The Games of the Gods, Book Two: Playing the Game
by vericus
Summary: Kari has been taken by the FBI, and Elrohir's dragged Glorfindel, Rachel, and friends back from Valinor to help him find her. Area 51 isn't going to know what hit it. THIS STORY IS ON AN INDEFINITE HIATUS. I APOLOGIZE FOR THE INCONVENIENCE.
1. Three Prologues

-The Games of the Gods, Book Two: Playing the Game-

WARNING: This IS a sequel. It is possible that you could understand it without reading the previous story, but my characters thrive on in jokes, and there is a fair bit of history that you won't catch - not to mention the prologues will be nearly ununderstandable - if you don't read book one, 'Setting The Board', first.

-Summary-  
Yes, everyone was married or courting at the end of our last tale - Yes, all was on the fast-track to being hunky-dorey fine - And yes, the universe did, in fact, end - But, in true Mary-Sue style, that doesn't mean that we can't have a sequel! Hang on to your hats, readers - Rachel and Glory are BACK!

-Disclaimer-  
Alas, I cannot do the fun disclaimers that I did last time due to rules, so I'll just stick to the plain and simple - Nothing belongs to me besides the characters of Rachel and Kari, and sometimes I wonder about them. The rest belongs to the brilliant genius that was JRR Tolkien...or reality.

-Prologue the First, Narative-  
-Time: Directly after the universe ended-

Darkness faded, revealing a lone ship in the midst of a great expanse of ocean. Two figures, one male, one female, stood in the bow of the ship, the female looking startled, the male, triumphant.

"See? The universe didn't end - we're not in some story!" the male declared. "That was likely just the passage onto the Straight Road to Valinor."

"No, it's much worse than a story. It's a sequel." the female said with a sigh. The male, looking annoyed, opened his mouth to reply, only to be stopped by a feminine voice, echoing through the universe.

"Come ON guys, we did this LAST story. It's old plot now." the Author said impatiently.

"Well Sooo-rry." the female on the ship said in mock-repentance.

"...I must dispise myself to make such willful and independant characters." the Author said with a sigh. "Well, let's just put a plot-hole patch over it and get on with the sequel." Then the sound of distant typing was heard throughout the world, and just as the female opened her mouth to speak, her eyes - and indeed, those of everyone in the universe - glazed over.

Moments later, Rachel stood in the bow of the ship on it's way to Valinor, her mouth open, wondering what she'd been about to say. She turned to her husband Glorfindel in confusion.

"What was I saying?" she asked. Glorfindel shrugged, looking equally confused.

"I don't know." he said. "But I have this vague urge to admit you were right about something..."

-Prologue the Second, Rachel's Point of View-  
-Time: December 3021 of the Third Age-

There was one slight disappointment about the entire journey to Valinor. There was no obvious transition point between when we were just a normal ship sailing, that could, conceivably, run into another ship out there on the big blue, and when we were on what the Elves referred to as 'the straight road', heading to Valinor. The only clue I had was that one morning I woke up to the lookout in the crows nest reporting that he could see Valinor ahead.

From the sighting of Valinor onwards, just about everybody was on deck for as long and as often as they possibly could be. I was absorbed in trying to see the legendary Undying Lands, myself, so I only casually noticed when Glorfindel, Elrond and Galadriel all disappeared at once, and that didn't even really register until I caught a flicker of dread coming across the bond from Glorfindel. I sent a questioning thought his way, but he insisted it was nothing, so I let it pass.

Soon enough we were docking, and everyone on board was quite amused at the fact that, upon seeing who was at the head of the crowd waiting for us, Elrond did not wait for a gangplank or any otherwise convenient form of disembarking. No, he just pushed his robes aside and vaulted over the railing of the ship onto the dock and met Celebrían with a hug and kiss that had half those present embarrassed, and the other half whistling or laughing. For my part, seeing that Celebrían was alright was probably one of the better things about coming to Valinor. It allowed me to let go of that niggling piece of guilt I had about not doing anything to stop the Orc attack.

Once the gangplank had been set up, the rest of us disembarked in a calmer fashion, and Galadriel was able to greet her daughter with a hug. Well, alright, she had to hug Elrond as well, since he didn't seem inclined to let go of Celebrían, but Galadriel didn't look as if she minded. The rest of us on the ship that knew Celebrían were then able to greet her, me being one of the last, as I knew Celebrían would probably need a moment or two to get over her shock, and would then want a brief explanation. I obliged, and just as I finished giving a brief explanation of how I'd 'died' and returned, that feeling of dread came from Glorfindel again.

I turned to look in Glorfindel's direction with a concerned frown, but Elrond had apparently caught a whiff of whatever Glorfindel was dreading, and caught my attention quickly and engaged me in a conversation, before I could focus on Glorfindel and whoever he was talking to. That, of course, only made me more curious, and I sent many questioning thoughts Glorfindel's way, but I got the impression that they weren't even reaching him. The answer eventually provided itself, however.

"Dammit, I want to see my Herald, Glorfindel! Get out of the bloody way!" The loud voice caused a momentary lull in the noise on the dock, and I turned with wide eyes to find none other than the High King Gil-galad pushing past a sheepish looking Glorfindel.

"Elrond! You finally made it here!" Gil-galad said as he strode up, completely ignoring me.

"And you made it out of Mandos' Halls." Elrond said with what looked suspiciously like a tight smile.

"I think he got tired of me." Gil-galad said with a grin as the two clasped each others arms in a roman handshake. At this point, Glorfindel appeared at my side and attempted to lead me away, but Gil-galad caught the movement and turned from Elrond to Glorfindel and me. He simply looked at us for a moment.

"So, you were not trying to keep me from Elrond after all, eh?" Gil-galad said, arching an eyebrow. "Who is this, then?"

"The purple monkey from Supercalifragilisticexpialidocious Land." I said with a straight face before Glorfindel could reply. Having recalled what Glorfindel said about Gil-galad's sense of humour, I now wanted to see if he was right about it. Gil-galad blinked at my response, and then slowly smiled.

"Welcome to Valinor then, Ms. Purple Monkey." he said solemnly. "We are always pleased to have Elves of different lands travel here."

"It's Mrs." I corrected. Gil-galad arched an eyebrow, and then noticed that Glorfindel was holding my hand. His eyes suddenly lit with understanding, and he grinned.

"So, our lovely substitute Sun finally got married, did he?" the High King asked.

"Yes indeed. Though the one he's married to shall have to express her concern over your referring to him as 'lovely'." I replied, quirking an eyebrow upwards.

"Oh, you do not have to worry." Gil-galad replied dismissively, and grinned impishly at me. "I'd be far more likely to pounce on you than him."

"Ew, High King cooties!" I said, making a face. Glorfindel couldn't hold in a snort of laughter. Everyone else was a little confused, not knowing what I meant, but Gil-galad got the gist of it and chuckled.

"You have a most interesting wife, Glorfindel." he said, turning to Glorfindel.

"Yes. I've yet to discover whether this is a good or bad thing, however." he said dryly. Gil-galad and I gave Glorfindel identical looks, arching our eyebrows at the same time. Glorfindel sighed. "I finally get you away from Haldir, and what does Mandos do? Release Gil-galad." Glorfindel grumbled, and I giggled.

"Oh come on, you know you love it." I said with a grin.

"Actually, I love you." Glorfindel corrected me. "The insanity just sort of follows you around."

"And this is a bad thing?" Gil-galad put in, just a step ahead of me. Glorfindel glanced between me and the High King, then shook his head and held up his hands in defeat. Gil-galad and I immediately turned to the much more interesting, and important, task of finding out just what each other's sense of humour was like, completely ignoring those on the dock who knew us both and shot somewhat despairing looks in our direction, especially when we set off away from the dock into Valinor proper discussing whether or not it would be possible to make a magnet big - and strong - enough to pull Vala's crowns off their heads. Which of course led to a debate over whether or not the Vala's crowns were even made of a magnetic metal...Glorfindel gave up discouraging me mentally after half an hour, and an hour after we set foot in Valinor, he had joined Gil-galad and I in our plotting.

-Prologue the Third, Narative-  
-Time: January 28th, 2004 A.D.-

:So the last thing I need to get is a few barrels of ice cream, and once we get those loaded, we can get out of here.: Kari announced.

:FINALLY: Elrohir grumbled inside her head. Kari glanced with amusement towards the wall of the store, beyond which was the parking lot containing her grumpy husband waiting in the car.

:Oh come on, it wasn't all that bad. Tell me you haven't enjoyed ice cream and pop and tequila.: Kari said as she moved her cart towards the frozen foods section. :Not to mention leather, modern music, water-proof fabric, indoor plumbing and electric heating...and the current women's fashion trends.: There was a short silence.

:Maybe that last one.: Elrohir admitted, and sent a random image of Kari on the beach a few years ago, when she had been wearing a particularly skimpy bikini. Kari chuckled out loud, getting a few odd looks, as she started to load up her cart with ice cream.

:I suppose I should just be happy that I was the star of that picture.: she said.

:Of course you were! Who else would I be thinking of in skimpy bikinis: Elrohir replied indignantly, and a wave of dread followed almost immediately on the end of that thought. Kari grinned to herself.

:Well, let's see...there was that model two years ago. And then that actress in 1990. And let's not forget the talent agent in 1981! Though, he would look odd in a bikini, I'll admit.: Kari was ready to continue as she, having finished loading up with ice cream, headed towards the check-out, but a mental blast of irritation from Elrohir stopped her mental speech, though she continued moving towards the check-out.

:And let's not mention your little adventures with that actor in 2000.: he said.

:Feh.: Kari muttered. :You just had to bring Hugh into this, didn't you? I've told you time and before, he doesn't count. No attempts at kissage, and I was hired as his bodyguard. Plus, he was, and still is, married:

:Oh yes, because HE didn't try and jump you, it doesn't count that you went all over the place with him, even if it was your job.: Elrohir retorted. :Do you think I WANTED to have all those models and actresses - or that agent, gaaah - jump me:

:Of course not.: Kari replied cheerfully, sending a wave of love in Elrohir's direction. Elrohir took the cue for what it was and didn't reply, letting Kari be while she focused on things outside of her head, such as paying the cashier.

They'd already spent hours teasing each other over the various people who had tried to jump them over the years, anyways. Though Elrohir seemed to have a particular grudge about the fact that Kari had managed to get a paying job as a bodyguard for one very attractive actor. Kari was sure that Elrohir, despite having paid jealous attention to everything she was doing while she was with the actor, thought that she'd done something with him. It was one of the many signs that it was time for them to leave, if Elrohir could believe, even subconciously, that she would betray their soul-bond.

Distracted as Kari was with paying for the food and contemplating Elrohir's mental problems, it was no surprise that she didn't notice something was off until too late. Of course, even she couldn't have expected an attack to occur in the middle of a grocery store, in front of dozens of people. On the other hand, it wasn't actually an obvious attack. The only thing the people in the store found odd about it, really, was that the 'medics' who carried her away after she fainted were wearing black suits instead of the usual paramedic outfits.

Of course, Elrohir, anxious to get out of there and to the sea - which had been calling to him for close to 300 years now - had been keeping tabs on his wife, and the instant he felt her mind go blank, he bolted from the car - which was probably the only thing that saved him. His mind barely registered the two men in black suits crouched behind his car, pumping something it, before he saw Kari being carried out of the store by more men in black suits. He stared for a moment, stopped dead in his tracks, half-way between the store and the car, and then whirled and ran.

He didn't stop until he reached Valinor, not even to find out if the FBI had bothered to officially put out a warrant for his arrest.

----To Be Continued...with masked elven party-crashers!----

-Authors Note:-

Ahhh, I'm back, writing a sequel to a story I swore I'd never write a sequel to! Scary, isn't it? I blame Glorfindel. And plot bunnies. Anyways, before anybody gets too excited, this story won't be updating very often - probably once a week minimum - but I'll do my best to keep it going.

Adding to the slow updating are the changes in Some major things have changed since I last posted a story on this site, and I'll be looking through them carefully over the next little while. So, please, just bear with me as I try to figure out what has done to itself...

And with that, I'm off for now...See you with the next update!

Crimson Starlight 


	2. Chapter 1: Valinor

-The Games of the Gods, Book Two: Playing the Game- 

-Disclaimer-  
Nothing belongs to me besides the characters of Rachel and Kari, and sometimes I wonder about them. The rest belongs to the brilliant genius that was JRR Tolkien...or reality.

-1: Valinor-

There was one thing about Glorfindel that everyone seemed to have forgotten, or simply neglected, to inform me of before we reached Valinor. And that is that he has a huge family. Mostly because his grandparents have literally been around since the beginning of civilization, which has given the family lots of time to grow, but also because everyone in his family seems to enjoy having kids - he has ten aunts and uncles, twenty-eight cousins (not counting his cousin-in-laws) and five younger siblings (and four siblings-in-law). It's really very scary, especially when you're not told ahead of time of how many relatives he has, and then you get to meet all his immediate family plus four aunts and uncles, five cousins and their significant others, all at once. And of course, Glorfindel didn't inform me that the people I was about to meet were all his family until he was helping me off my horse.

When he had a good grip on my waist and I couldn't run away.

I ended up practically hiding behind Glorfindel during the introductions to his family. He, of course, found it incredibly amusing, and when we finally managed to escape from Glorfindel's family later that night, he collapsed into laughter.

:You are afraid of the strangest things.: he declared mentally, as he was laughing so hard he couldn't speak.

"So I find large crowds of relatives scary. It's not that hard to conceive of, especially when the relatives are in-laws!" I replied defensively. "And I wasn't prepared for you having such a large family! You could have warned me!" Glorfindel calmed himself enough to talk verbally.

"One would think that you would have guessed, considering how old I am." he said, still chuckling slightly.

"You know I'm still getting used to this whole immortality thing." I said sternly. "Plus...honestly, Fëanor is the only Elf I'd heard of before now to have a lot of kids!"

"Well, he wasn't the only one." Glorfindel informed me.

"Damn." I muttered, which set Glorfindel off again. In revenge, I made him sleep on the floor that night. Ah, the glory of modern-day woman's lib. Of course, when I woke up, he'd found his way back onto the bed. Which was just as well, since his eldest younger sister - her name was Laurind - apparently had no compunction about walking in without knocking to inform us that breakfast was being served at some unholy hour of the morning. Glorfindel was up quickly, bright and cheery. After telling Glorfindel that I would run off with Gil-galad if he dared haul me out of bed at that hour, I went back to sleep.

I suppose that, since I first hid behind Glorfindel when being introduced to his family, and then skipped breakfast, it was completely understandable that his family got the wrong idea about me. But it actually was rather nice that they did, as only one or two approached me at one time after that. Then, of course, Glorfindel decided that I was out of practice using my sword. Never mind that there was no where to use it, except in practice, in Valinor. Glorfindel was adamant that I needed to keep in practice, however, so I changed into my custom-made trousers and tunic and headed out to the family practice ring (looking surprisingly like Glorfindel's study in Rivendell) with Glorfindel to practice.

Of course, as luck would have it, when we got there, Glorfindel's two younger brothers - Vanimonda and Tulcórë - were already there practicing. Upon seeing me, however, they gave up the practice ring to watch. And get the other family members to come see what Glorfindel's 'timid' wife could do. It wasn't like I was good enough to put up a decent fight against Glorfindel, but apparently everyone in the family knew how hard double-bladed swords were to use, and were more than surprised that I could use them. When Glorfindel finally decided that I'd had enough practice, the eldest of his sisters, Laurind, was the first of the family to approach me.

"I had no idea that you could use a double-bladed sword." she said cautiously. "Didn't even think you were the type to pick up a weapon, really."

"Well, large families scare me, especially when I'm not warned of them ahead of time." I said with a glare at Glorfindel, figuring that I might as well tell the truth. Glorfindel staunchly ignored me as he inspected his sword.

"He didn't warn you?" Laurind asked, arching an eyebrow.

"Nope. Seemed to find it funny." I replied, and Laurind promptly went over to Glorfindel and whacked him upside the head. I grinned, while Glorfindel looked up at his sister with innocent confusion.

"Oh, don't give me that." Laurind said with a snort, then proceeded to give Glorfindel a very nice long lecture about how just because he grew up in a large family doesn't mean everyone else did, and how some people find large groups of blood-related people scary. I just watched with amusement, adding occasional mental comments. When Laurind finally finished, I received a very meek mental apology from Glorfindel.

:I think I like your sister.: I replied with a smirk. :Apology accepted.: Glorfindel looked more than a little scared when I then left the practice ring with Laurind, chatting away about men. Larelin and Loselen, Glorfindel's other two sisters, soon joined us, and I found myself with a new group of mischief-makers to cause chaos with. Apparently Glorfindel's sense of humour is a family thing.

After that, I fit into Glorfindel's family scarily well. There was the ever-present disagreement over children, which I didn't want, but everyone in Glorfindel's family seemed bound and determined to convince me that I did want. Glorfindel wisely stuck to my side in that disagreement. Of course, eventually, I decided that having a kid was a good idea, after all, but that was only after Elladan and Mírëría (who had gotten married since we'd last seen them) arrived in Valinor after 500 or so years and informed me that Elrohir and Kari wouldn't be coming to Valinor for another several millennia. The explanation for that was amusing.

"Why?" I had asked Elladan, looking thoroughly confused, when he told me how long it would be before Kari and Elrohir came to Valinor.

"Well, Kari said something about 'it wasn't the Goa'uld, it was the Elves?'" Elladan said, looking just as confused as me. I stared at him blankly for a moment, not quite comprehending. Then I realized what Kari had meant, and I squealed, bouncing up and down. Elladan, Mírëría and Glorfindel all edged away from me.

"Rachel?" Glorfindel asked tentatively.

"It appears I was wrong about Kari and I being from a different universe or world." I declared.

"Oh?" Elladan asked, now curious.

"Yes. Apparently we're just from far in the future." I said. "And since she's immortal, Kari's probably going to wait around until the time we came from." There was a moment of silence.

"Why?" Glorfindel asked finally.

"Because there are some good things about the time we come from. Like leather clothing." I pondered that for a moment. "She better bring some of that with her when she finally gets here. In Glorfindel sizes." Glorfindel eyed me for a moment.

"I'm suddenly scared." he said, shaking his head.

"Don't be." I replied with a grin. "It can make human guys look about equal with Elf-lords. So just think what it will make Elf-lords look like." I went a little dreamy, picturing Glorfindel in leather - a picture which I then sent to Glorfindel. He spluttered some and squeaked mentally about it looking uncomfortable and tight. I informed him that even if it was, he wouldn't be staying in it long enough to be bothered. Glorfindel's response was a combination of mental words, pictures, and feelings, that resulted in our conversation with Elladan and Mírëría being cut short in favour of a trip to our bedroom.

At any rate, the revelation that Kari wouldn't be coming to Valinor to get all my jokes (Glorfindel tried, but it spoiled most jokes when I had to explain them to him, even if it was just mentally) prompted me to seek out a distraction, which came in the form of a child. Glorfindel was quite surprised when I announced that I wanted to have a child, actually. But then, I DID just announce it out of the blue, while he was in the middle of taking a drink. The whole point of announcing it at that instant was to get the spitting-out-drink-in-surprise response, though, so that succeeded nicely.

Of course, once we'd decided to have a child, and it had been confirmed a few months later that yes indeed, I was pregnant, there came the task of coming up with a name. Gil-galad had quite a few suggestions for that.

"You could call it Helcëhin!" he suggested cheerfully.

"Why? I hate ice." I said blankly.

"How about Úlairiraumo?" Gil-galad asked, and I looked at him strangely.

"Once again - why?" I asked.

"Well, any child of yours and Glorfindel's is bound to cause trouble." Gil-galad replied with a shrug.

"I will not have my child named 'Názgul Storm'!" Glorfindel growled.

"Oh, calm down." Gil-galad said, waving off Glorfindel's annoyance. "How about Airahelma?"

"Though that will probably aptly describe their appearance right after they're born, that will only last so long." I said.

"Ëarholme? Rómahin?" Gil-galad tried.

"Now you're just trying to find stupid names." I said, giving Gil-galad a weary look.

"Then it will be Ondoelen!" Gil-galad declared.

"VALAR NO!" I exclaimed. "I am NOT naming my child 'Rock Star'!"

"You are hereby banned from suggesting baby names." Glorfindel declared with a shudder (he having been in on my explanation of the entertainment industry of the future), and then clamped his hand over Gil-galad's mouth when the High King opened it to suggest another name. Gil-galad looked quite incensed with this and attempted to throw Glorfindel off, but Glorfindel can hang on like a monkey when he wants to, and he kept his hand over Gil-galad's mouth until the High King promised not to suggest any more baby names.

In revenge, Gil-galad actually accepted an invitation to another part of Valinor which would involve him being away for around sixty years. I really couldn't see who he thought he was taking revenge on...yes, it was boring without him, but really - he was the one who missed out. He didn't get to be there when Glorfindel's and my daughter Calenda was born, or while she grew up. Though it turned out to be advantageous in the end, as by the time Gil-galad finally came back, Calenda was already grown.

Which made it a lot easier for the two of them to fall in love.

It was really very odd. Within a month after Gil-galad coming back, I walked out into the garden one day to find my daughter and the High King making with the smoochies. The two of them, as well as Glorfindel, still love to tell the story of how that was the first time I ever fainted - and how I woke up laughing afterwards. Glorfindel still claims that I was mentally hysterical with laughter for the rest of the week, too.

Then, of course, I realized that this meant Gil-galad was going to be my son-in-law, and oh how I had fun teasing him about that. Calenda eventually told me to stop it before I scared him off. I stopped. At least until after the wedding, when Gil-galad was stuck with both my daughter and me.

From then on, life in Valinor became more interesting. With Gil-galad now related to me, and the apparent inheritance of my sense of humour by Calenda, Glorfindel's family's sense of humour, and Elladan as another partner in crime, I was collecting a group of crazy people. Finally, on the evening Calenda turned 200, while we were having a large party befitting the wife of a High King - which had most everyone actually related to the birthday girl utterly bored because it was so dull - Elladan suggested that was find some disguises and crash our own party. Well, he suggested it somewhat differently, but that was the gist of it.

That's what we did, anyways - me, Elladan, Laurind, Glorfindel's two brothers, Vanimonda and Tulcórë, and two of Glorfindel's cousins found matching, heavy winter cloaks, took the scarves that went with them and wrapped them around our faces, found a few musical instruments and a bottle or two of mirovur, and crashed my daughter's birthday party. We'd all shut our respective spouses out of our minds, too, so even they had no idea what was going on when seven masked Elves showed up and began handing out extremely strong alcohol while playing the tunes to some rather...interesting drinking songs. Glorfindel realized it when I started dancing with him, however - as did Gil-galad and Calenda when I (having had a little too much mirovur myself at that point) started singing 'The Bad Touch'. I sang in English, of course, but both Calenda and Gil-galad (along with Glorfindel and Laurind) had learned the language somehow or another over the years.

The whole thing was all over as a huge scandal the next day, of course, but as no one knew who had caused the trouble (we'd all managed to get out with our disguises intact, amazingly enough) there was no one to blame, and it soon became The Mystery of the Mischief Makers. Of course, after we realized what chaos we had caused in the calm serenity of Valinor, we could hardly wait to do it again. We pooled our resources, and got Larelin (who was an excellent sculptor) to make white, grinning porcelain masks for us - my suggestion - which we then decorated festively. Laurind, who was a fair weaver, made some sparkling silver cloaks and black tunics and trousers, which we left the way they were.

Two days after our 'outfits' were done, the same seven from the party, plus Larelin (who had insisted on being let in on the fun as payment for making the masks) ambushed the High King's hunting party and made a 'royal mockery' of it. In the end, we actually 'kidnapped' Gil-galad, though only the nobles in the hunting party minded. Gil-galad found the whole thing absolutely hilarious and insisted that he be allowed to join the fun next time.

It soon grew from there, with other Elves from around Valinor who enjoyed fun popping into our area long enough for us to be sure of their sense of humour and induct them into our craziness before going back to wherever they were from to spread the craziness. We actually developed an induction ceremony at one point, but it was soon abandoned in favour of the idea of an induction ceremony in which the only rules were that it had to be different from every other induction ceremony before it.

And so the Masked Masters of Chaos were born - or simply the Annoying Ones to those who didn't like us. Really though, Valinor needed some livening up. Even the Valar agreed with us. Tulkas' and Orome's honorary membership in the Masked Masters of Chaos attested to that. They deserved the honorary memberships, too, as they managed to crash one of OUR parties rather effectively by turning all the non-alcohol drinks at the party into mirovur, and turning all the alcoholic drinks into water - without changing the taste, so we didn't know what was going on until most of us were drunk. Plus they disguised themselves as Balrogs and scared the crap out of Glorfindel, which earned them points with everyone. (It had become a running joke that only two things scared Glorfindel - losing me, and Balrogs. Everything else just got him pissed off.)

Besides the two Valar's induction, the one other that was memorable was Ecthelion. It had taken him awhile to get out of Mandos' Halls, but once he did, he apparently stayed in one place only long enough to find out where Glorfindel was hanging out before making a beeline for that place. Of course, he happened to show up on a night when the MMC were having a planning session, and not only that, he snuck in hoping to surprise Glorfindel. The evening soon turned into some sort of bad horror film - every time we turned around, someone was gone. Finally, Glorfindel and I were the only ones left, with me scared out of my wits (I always hated horror films of any type) and Glorfindel royally pissed on my behalf. Then Ecthelion decided to speak up, still hiding in the shadows of the room.

"Dieing wasn't enough excitement for you, eh?" he asked loudly from the shadows. Glorfindel scowled, trying to pinpoint where the mysterious voice was coming from. "And neither was seeing the downfall of a Dark Lord not only once, but twice. Do you just have incurable boredom?" Something about that question seemed to spark Glorfindel's memory, as suddenly he started laughing. I peered at him for a moment, wondering what he found so funny, and then he straightened.

"ECTHELION! Get your sorry butt out here before I find a Balrog to drag it out!" he called, and Ecthelion, grinning, did as demanded.

"It took you long enough to figure out who it was." he said.

"Well last time we had a party crasher it was Tulkas and Orome." Glorfindel said with a roll of his eyes as he and Ecthelion shook hands and then hugged. "Now where have you hidden my daughter and the rest of our friends?"

"Your daughter was among those?" Ecthelion asked, then tsked. "I would have thought you would teach your offspring better."

"He hasn't exactly had the need." I piped up, stepping forward. Ecthelion looked over at me and I stuck out my hand. "Hi, I'm Rachel. Or Elenlómë, depending. I assume you're Ecthelion of the House of the Fountain." Ecthelion nodded, looking amused as he shook my hand.

"I gathered as I was watching that you and Glorfindel are married, which was why I let you be." he said.

"Which was probably a very wise idea." I said with a wry smile. "Since I bite and kick where it hurts." Ecthelion arched an eyebrow.

"She's also one of the ones responsible for the formation of this mass of mischief makers." Glorfindel put in. "Which brings to light the fact that you still haven't told us what you've done with them."

"I locked them in the kitchen." Ecthelion said with a shrug.

"The kitchen doesn't have a lock?" I said with confusion.

"It does now." Ecthelion replied with a smirk. Glorfindel rolled his eyes.

"Have you been re-arranging furniture again Ecthelion, despite Turgon's orders not to do so ever again?" he asked.

"Only a little." Ecthelion said with a smirk, and I gaped at him.

"Dude. That sounded exactly like Jack Sparrow." I said in wonder, then squealed and glomped onto Ecthelion. "You're my new second-favouritest Elf-lord!"

"Um...thanks?" Ecthelion said, looking distinctly weirded out as he glanced to Glorfindel for explanation.

"She's insane." Glorfindel supplied helpfully. I didn't even bother to glare at him, as I would have given the same explanation.

"Mmhmm. So I'm beginning to gather." Ecthelion said. "But we should probably go let the others out of the kitchen?"

"Yes, we should. Time to let go, Rachel." Glorfindel said, attempting to pry me off of Ecthelion. I refused, however, and eventually ended up holding onto Ecthelion in piggy-back style, at which point I insisted that as punishment for scaring me out of my wits, he was going to carry me to the kitchens. Ecthelion looked somewhat pleadingly at Glorfindel, but Glorfindel just shrugged.

"Why are you on her side?" Ecthelion asked with disbelief.

"He's on my side because I'm his wife and the mother of his child, Jack. Now move it." I said, giving Ecthelion a slap on the shoulder. Ecthelion grumbled, but then set off for the kitchens grudgingly.

"Jack?" Glorfindel asked as we went. I shrugged.

"Sounds good. I'll come up with a better one later." I said.

"Another what?" Ecthelion asked.

"Nickname." I replied. There was a moment of silence.

"Please tell me you don't mean you're going to now call me 'Jack'." Ecthelion almost pleaded.

"Within a week of knowing Glorfindel I was calling him 'Glory'. Ten minutes after meeting Gil-galad I started calling him 'Gilly'. Galadriel is now and forever shall be 'Gal', and Elrond has been 'Rondy' since Celebrían commented on his lack of a nickname. You are now 'Jack' until I decide otherwise. And there is no way you will change my mind." I declared, deciding it was best not to mention how Haldir had managed to blackmail me into dropping his nickname.

"Actually Rachel, the only reason I knew anything about double-bladed swords was because -" I cut Glorfindel off.

"DON'T EVEN SAY IT." I exclaimed. "I deny it! I will not give up another good nickname!"

"Ow, those were my ears." Ecthelion said with a wince as we arrived at the kitchen. I jumped off of him and looked with amusement at the large chests that were piled in front of the door, and which occasionally shook as someone on the other side tried to open the door.

"Turgon would be so disappointed that you so easily forgot his command." Glorfindel said with a sigh.

"Hey, I died helping his daughter escape from Gondolin unharmed, I think that excuses me from any of his unnecessary commands." Ecthelion said defensively.

"Someday, I want to here the story of how Turgon ordered you not to move furniture. For now, let's get Gilly and the others out so we can induct you." I said.

"Induct me?" Ecthelion asked with surprise.

"Of course." I said as Ecthelion and Glorfindel set to moving the chests in front of the kitchen door. "You crashed an MMC party. Anyone who does that successfully gets instant membership." Ecthelion looked at Glorfindel, who shrugged.

"She's right. Now help me move these chests." he said, grabbing the end of one of the chests in front of the door. Ecthelion sighed, grabbed the other end, and the two set to removing the chests until they both had to jump back as someone on the other side was able to push the door open. After that, everyone poured out of the kitchen, demanding to know what was going on, and when it was finally explained, they all agreed that Ecthelion deserved an immediate induction. So we inducted him, got him rip-roaring drunk - and locked him in the kitchen. The MMC may love mischief and making chaos, but they also have a strong sense of revenge.

Sadly, though, after that first meeting, Ecthelion rarely participated in the MMC. Glorfindel said this was typical for Ecthelion, who liked to hide in the background. The MMC tried to draw him out after that, of course, but Glorfindel held them back from their full potential, and in the end, Ecthelion just became another honorary, never-present member like Tulkas and Orome.

And of course, we can't forget Haldir. Who snuck into Valinor and hid on the opposite side of the continent from me for almost 500 years before I discovered him. Unfortunately for him, by that time I was not only mother-in-law to a High King, but the MMC was at it's height. Poor Haldir didn't figure out what was happening for almost a decade, as he became the MMC's primary target. When he finally did figure it out, he paid me a rather stormy visit which ended up being just one step short of another kinslaying.

In the end, Glorfindel and his family, along with Haldir's family, decided that it was best to keep the two of us apart from then on, and actually managed to do so for another 500 years. One of the Valar - Haldir and I have yet to figure out which one, though Tulkas and Orome are the prime suspects - decided that Haldir and I needed to settle things, however. We woke up one morning to find ourselves in the middle of the largest patch of wilderness in Valinor, completely alone, and weaponless. After two days straight of constant arguing, Haldir and I realized how incredibly stupid our on-going antagonism was, and a week later - having finally arrived back at civilization - Haldir and I were on horses heading back to where I lived with Glorfindel (and his family...huge estate, great fun to live on). With a bottle of mirovur each. Needless to say, we arrived very, very drunk, singing the worst songs we could think of. Or think up.

From then on, Haldir and I were as close to friends as we were ever going to get - we wouldn't normally go visit each other or spend time around one another, but whenever one of us felt the need to just get away from everyone and everything, we'd go kidnap the other and we'd ride through Valinor, drunk off our asses, singing dirty songs. Valinlot - who was now, unsurprisingly, married to Haldir - and Glorfindel completely flipped out the first time we did our little drinking-and-singing ride-about, but they soon came to accept our strange little way of getting along with one another. Though both Haldir and I had to endure endless jokes about us not being able to get along with each other UNLESS we were at least partially drunk.

Anyways. That's the basics on how I spent over five thousand years in Valinor. If you want specifics as to politics, lands, who did what, don't look at me - I barely paid attention to most of that stuff, unless it was to cause chaos. Sure, I was the mother-in-law of a High King, but Elvish politics were infinitely less complex and cut-throat than human ones (unless you involved wood-elves, and even then, they were more stubborn than cut-throat).

Surprisingly, technology didn't advance too much, either. Elves are clever - but apparently it takes a limited lifespan and the insatiable curiosity of humans to cause fast-paced advancements in technology. Plus...well, the Elves didn't really seem to have any interest in advanced technologies. I mean, when you had magic, lived in a virtual paradise, and could regularly speak with gods if you wanted to, what's the point in having fancy gadgets like TVs and Computers? I missed my science fiction, of course, but...hey. Some sacrifices aren't all that hard to make when you're submerged in a world where myths, magic, and gods are reality.

----To Be Continued...with Elrohir!----

-Important Information-  
Gil-galad's 'suggestions' for baby names translate as follows:  
Helcëhin - Ice Child  
Úlairiraumo - Názgul Storm  
Airahelma - Ruddy Skin  
Ëarholme - Sea Odour  
Rómahin - Loud Child  
Ondoelen - Stone/Rock Star

Glorfindel's immediate family, in order of age, are as follows:  
Loseren (Snow Steel) - father  
Laurafanya (Golden Cloud) - mother  
Glorfindel!Laurind (Golden Heart) - eldest younger sister  
Vanimonda (Fair Hearted) - eldest younger brother  
Tulcórë (Strong Heart) - youngest younger brother  
Larelind (Summer Song) - middle younger sister  
Loselen (Snow Star) - youngest younger sister

-Authors Note-  
Muha. OK. Hope y'all enjoyed the first actual chapter of the story. It was a little troublesome for me to write - it's been awhile since I read the Silmarillion, and even though I now OWN a copy of it...I don't really want to read it again right now. So I just erred on the side of caution where I could.

And, hm, I suppose I should say 'thank you' to all my reviewers...though 'thank you' doesn't do all of you justice. 24 reviews just for the prologues! You people are amazing. I'd give you all batches of home-baked cookies if I could, but unfortunately you'll have to settle for some cyber-cookies instead. hands out cyber-cookies to everyone

Now, I go! zhoom See ya...whenever I get around to updating again!

-Crimson Starlight


	3. Chapter 2: Arrival

-The Games of the Gods, Book Two: Playing the Game-

-Disclaimer-  
Nothing belongs to me besides the characters of Rachel and Kari, and sometimes I wonder about them. The rest belongs to the brilliant genius that was JRR Tolkien...or reality.

-2: Arrival -

Of course, things didn't stay all hunky-dory fine. They never can. You'd think someone or something would have given us some warning, though - but nope, we hadn't a clue that anything was going on until the day Elrohir burst in one day when Glorfindel, Gil-galad and Ecthelion were sparring against me, Laurind, and Calenda. Yes, three on three - and it was a fair fight. I had learned over the years...both skillwise, and in how to distract Glorfindel so thoroughly that he'd trip over his own feet.

Glorfindel had just done that, actually - tripped over his own feet - and Gil-galad was in the middle of making some rather crude jokes about where Glorfindel's brain was, with Calenda twitching and obviously just about to tell him to shut up because Glorfindel WAS her dad, when Elrohir tumbled into the practice yard. No one recognized that it was Elrohir, of course, all of them thinking it was Elladan at first, despite the fact that he sported short hair instead of the usual long hair of Elves. I, however, noticed the haircut, as well as the jeans, hiking boots, and t-shirt underneath his cloak.

"Elrohir? What the purple blazes!" I exclaimed as everyone else finished with their various forms of 'Hi Elladan'. They immediately stilled at my words, even when Elrohir staggered forward a few steps and just about collapsed, only to be caught by me. Glorfindel sent an incredulous, questioning thought my way, and I sent back a mental close-up of Elrohir's clothes. 

"Why the hell did you have to live so far from the coast?" Elrohir muttered as I helped him to one of the seats that was scattered around the practice ring for spectators and resting sparrers.

"It's where Glory's family lives." I replied. "What's the matter, Elrohir? Where's Kari?"

"Gone." Elrohir said, heaving a sigh of relief as he sat down on the bench.

"Gone? Not..." Glorfindel trailed off as he came closer.

"No, she's not dead. She might as well be, though." Elrohir said bitterly. "I don't know what happened, I only saw men in black suits carting her away, but since they'd evidently knocked her out somehow, I just ran. I got a fuzzy mental message from her just as I was heading for the coast that 'the FBI sucks'. So I figure they did it."

"I always knew there was something fishy about the FBI." I said grumpily.

"There was something about Area 51 in her message, too." Elrohir added with amusement, glancing up at me.

"Really? HAH!" I exclaimed, and then paused. "Wait. Bad FBI. They're supposed to kidnap aliens, not Elves."

"Same thing to them, I'm afraid. Never mind that we were there first." Elrohir said with a sigh.

"Um, I'm confused." Calenda said at that point. Elrohir, seeming to notice her for the first time, frowned lightly, and then glanced at Glorfindel and I. He cocked his head to one side, glancing between us two and Calenda almost suspiciously.

"Elrohir, meet my daughter, Calenda. Calenda, the purple twin." I said. Elrohir groaned.

"6000 years!" he exclaimed. "Six thousand! You'd think she'd forget! But noooooo..."

"Rachel has a very long memory." Glorfindel said dryly, and then amended, "About certain things." I chuckled.

"Still confused, here." Calenda pointed out.

"As am I." Gil-galad added.

"Me three." Laurind said.

"Me four." Ecthelion put in.

"Alright, alright, I get the hint...nobody who hasn't either lived in the modern world or has a tap into my brain understands what's going on!" I exclaimed. "You don't have to pester me about it! It's a hard thing to explain, anyways."

"The FBI is an agency of intelligence gatherers for one of the largest nations now on Earth. They have been surrounded by rumors and stories ever since people were able to communicate with each other reliably, frequently, and quickly. Most people believe those rumors and stories to be false, however, especially the one about a supposed secret base, named Area 51, where the FBI - supposedly - does secret experiments on creatures that aren't from this world." Elrohir rattled off. "But apparently Area 51 does exist, only they don't have creatures from another world to experiment on - they have my wife." There was silence for a moment.

"Nice summary." I commented finally.

"Thank you, I thought it up while I was sailing and galloping here. You and Glorfindel are wonderful, but I don't think even you can break into one of the most secret and guarded bases in the US of A all by your twosies." Elrohir said.

"This is true." I said wryly. "Alright, so we bring Gil-galad, Ecthelion and Elladan along."

"Six?" Elrohir arched an eyebrow.

"Calenda and Mírëría too, then? But Mírëría doesn't know English." I said. Ecthelion had learned English somewhere along the way, too - I think Gil-galad taught him.

"Gil-galad, Ecthelion, Elladan and your daughter do?" Elrohir asked in surprise.

"Yeah, it sucks - I can't say nasty things about them to Glorfindel anymore." I said with a mock scowl.

"Yes you can." Calenda said, and then pointed to her head. "You can do it mentally."

"She's too busy making kinky suggestions mentally to badmouth us that way." Gil-galad put in.

"By the Valar! These are my PARENTS, Gil! Would you PLEASE lay off the mental image-spawning remarks for at least a little while!" Calenda said despairingly.

"Never!" Gil-galad declared, only it came out more like 'Nevah!', which made me giggle. Calenda sighed.

"I guess I'll have to occupy your mouth, then." she said, and promptly kissed Gil-galad. When the two didn't show any sign of stopping after a few minutes, I shook my head and turned my back on them, ignoring them as best I could. The others followed suit.

"And she wonders why he won't stop making such comments." Ecthelion muttered. I snickered.

"I missed something here." Elrohir said, arching an eyebrow.

"Calenda and Gil-galad are married." I said with a dismissive wave of my hand.

"Oh Valar. You, related to royalty?" Elrohir groaned.

"And she's the head of an organization which counts Tulkas and Orome as two of its members." Glorfindel said dryly.

"Gah. Are you people all crazy! The last person you want to let have power is Rachel!" Elrohir exclaimed. I opened my mouth to reply, but the door to the practice arena slammed open once again, stopping me, and a green, gold, brown and beige blur slammed into Elrohir, knocking him off his seat. Elrohir yelped, and then a loud slurp was heard.

"Oh, 'Dan, gross!" Elrohir exclaimed. "Go do that to your wife!" The blur, now recognizable as Elladan, grinned as he stood up, offering his hand to his twin. Elrohir ignored the hand, eyeing it and its owner suspiciously as he got to his feet by himself while edging away from Elladan and wiping his cheek on his sleeve.

"Apologies, but I was just so terribly happy to see you again." Elladan said cheerily, bouncing up and down as he hummed, almost visibly holding himself back from latching onto his brother once again.

"How did you even know he was here?" Calenda asked from behind me, apparently having finally stopped smooching her husband.

"Mental connection. Not incredibly strong, but enough to sense the other's presence when we're both on the same side of Valinor, and to generally sense the other's emotions if we're close." Elrohir said with a sigh.

"Speaking of which, you need sleep." Elladan commented, then lost control of himself and let out a little squeal before enveloping Elrohir in a bear hug.

"Rachel? A little help?" Elrohir asked in exasperation.

"I thought you thought that I was the last person that should have power?" I replied with a smirk.

"And your tendency to use it for your own purposes is why." Elrohir said with a sigh.

"Alright, alright...Glory? Jack?" I said, turning to Ecthelion and Glorfindel. Yes, Ecthelion's nickname had stuck - but that was only because he continued to act disturbingly like Jack Sparrow on some occasions.

"Why us?" they asked at the same time.

"Because if Glory doesn't help, he isn't getting any tonight, and if Ecthelion doesn't help, I'll use my powers to see that he's the next victim of the MMC, never mind that he's a member." I said. Glorfindel and Ecthelion glanced at each other, then hopped to and pried Elladan off Elrohir, forcing him down to the ground and sitting on him for good measure.

"Good doggies." I said with a purr. The two former lords of Gondolin glared back at me, and I grinned before returning my attention to Elladan.

"Alright, so you need help getting Kari back. Glory, Jack, Calenda, Gilly, Laurind and Elladan know English. Anyone else that we bring will need to be taught it, or have to stay out of the way." I said.

"Well...they might do." Elrohir said cautiously.

"Don't forget the grand ol' lesson of the War of the Ring. A few can go where an army cannot." I pointed out. "Keeping the group small is probably the best way to ensure success." Elrohir sighed.

"Yeah, I know." he said.

"We're talking about going back to earth in your time, right?" Glorfindel asked suddenly, and Elrohir and I nodded. "Laurind and Calenda aren't going." The two in question turned to Glorfindel with surprised, confused looks. I joined them.

"Why the heck not?" I asked. In response, Glorfindel mentally echoed back some words of mine from years before when I had been in a cynical mood and described the crime rates and types of crimes in my world.

:If they stick with us, they won't be in any danger...plus, they're probably better trained in defending themselves while unarmed than the damned police are.: I told Glorfindel.

:I will not stick my daughter and sister into that world. If I thought I could get away with it, I'd say you couldn't go, either.: Glorfindel said. I sighed out loud, and Laurind and Calenda turned their confused looks my way.

"Glory's being protective." I explained. "Earth around now can be a little...rough in spots." I glanced at Gil-galad, then at Laurind and Calenda, then to Elrohir. "What do you think, Elrohir? Would it be safe for them to go wandering around Earth?" Elrohir looked uncertain.

"That's answer enough for me." Glorfindel said firmly. "They stay."

"And I get stuck with five guys?" I said, making a face. "I don't think so. Calenda comes."

"Hey, why Calenda and not me? I'm older and have had more experience!" Laurind objected.

"You won't have a hubby along that can let us know if you're in trouble or...help you should you get in trouble and we not be able to get there in time." I said carefully.

:You are aware that this is your DAUGHTER that you're talking about throwing into your world.: Glorfindel said mentally, sounding distinctly annoyed.

:Yes, I am. I also know that she deserves to know where I come from.: I replied. :Plus I think she'd love it there. Your sister would, too. Hell, your whole family would...actually, they might turn the world into utter chaos.:

:All the more reason to keep them away from it, yes: Glorfindel suggested, and I nodded.

"Alright, any of those named not WANT to go?" I asked, turning to the group of elves. Gil-galad, Ecthelion, and Calenda looked at each other.

"Bored." Gil-galad finally said, pointing to himself.

"Out of my wits." Ecthelion added, also pointing to himself.

"Now who has incurable boredom?" Glorfindel said with a chuckle.

"I follow him." Calenda said, pointing to Gil-galad.

"Just like Elladan will be following Elrohir?" I said with amusement.

"Except that I doubt-" Gil-galad was cut short by Glorfindel putting him in a headlock.

"I looked after those twins when they were babies and tutored them when they were older. I do NOT want to hear what you were about to say." he announced.

"Us either." Elladan and Elrohir chorused.

"And on that topic, Rachel, I have something to thank you for." Elrohir said, turning to me. I eyed him warily.

"You do? On THAT topic?" I asked, and Elrohir nodded.

"Thank you for refusing to tell me and Elladan what incest is." Elrohir said earnestly.

"You're very very welcome." I replied just as earnestly.

"But now you know, so there's no point in keeping it a secret from me, so what is it?" Elladan asked, obviously very curious. Elrohir glanced at me, mischief in his eyes.

"No, don't you dare. That would be squicky. And I'd be forced to tell Kari. And Mírëría." I said with a scowl at Elrohir. Elrohir pouted. "Though Kari might just ask me if I managed to take a picture." I said with a frown.

"Of what?" Elladan interrupted. "Stop wiggling around the subject and answer my question? What is incest?" As I turned to Elladan to give him an explanation, Gil-galad suddenly burst out laughing. I shot Glorfindel, who still had Gil-galad in a headlock, a confused look.

:He asked if it was related to his non-spoken comment.: Glorfindel said with a shrug.

:And what did you say? Like a bee to Manwe's nose or something equally random: I asked, giving him a weird look.

:I just told him it was the same thing.: Glorfindel mentally muttered.

"Gilly, yo humour is whack, yo." I told Gil-galad with a shake of my head, then turned to Elladan. "You want your answer?"

"Yes." Elladan said emphatically, nodding.

"You know what you do at night with your wife? Do that with him -" I pointed to Elrohir. "- and you have incest. Actually, twincest, to be precise. If it was Arwen, it would just be plain incest." I explained. Those to whom my explanation was an actual explanation and not merely a repetition of known facts looked at me blankly for a moment, then made creeped out or disgusted faces.

"Oh Valar, yes, thank you for not telling me before. Actually, I wish you still hadn't told me." Elladan said, shuddering and edging away from his twin.

"And just think, back on earth, there are teenage girls who write stories about that. With us as the characters." Elrohir said with an evil grin.

"Not to mention just plain incest with Haldir and...well, most often Rumil." I pointed out.

"And there was the one with father, me, 'Dan AND Glorfindel." Elrohir added.

"Oh, you found that one?" I said in surprise.

"The summary, at least." Elrohir said with a shudder. "Then I ran off and distracted myself with Kari."

"Not surprising. Find any Boromir and Faramir ones?" I asked.

"One or two." Elrohir said with a shrug. Our conversation finished, Elrohir and I turned our attention back to everyone else - to find them staring at us in horror. Well, everyone except Glorfindel.

"Yep, you can all be glad that either you don't have siblings, or your siblings aren't well known back on earth." I said with a grin.

"Of course, we won't mention the stories written about dear Glory and Ecthelion." Elrohir said dryly.

"Oh Valar, please don't remind me." I said with a shudder. Elrohir opened his mouth to reply, but I cut him off with the wave of a hand. "No, no I'm not worried. Glory is mine and mine alone. Ecthelion knows that just as much as anyone else." I said firmly.

:Can we PLEASE get off this topic: Glorfindel muttered in my mind, watching Ecthelion edge away from him as what Elrohir and I were talking about sunk in. I sent back a mental agreement, but Gil-galad wasn't quite done.

"Out of curiosity, do these stories mention me at all?" he asked. I noted that Glorfindel had let him out of his headlock at some point. I only noted this because Glorfindel promptly put him back in one.

"How well do you like Elrond, Gilly?" I asked dryly. "Or Círdan? How about one of Fëanor's sons? Maybe Celebrimbor? Elendil? Isildur? Elros? Erestor? And there is, of course, always Glory." :Man-whore of Middle-earth.: I added mentally. Glorfindel replied with a rather dirty suggestion about showing me what he'd learned during his man-whoring. At this point, Gil-galad, whose eyes had been steadily widening as I went down my list, finally managed to let out a little squeak. "Well, you asked." I said.

"It's a worse list for father, trust me." Elrohir said with a sigh.

"Actually, Glorfindel has the worst." I pointed out.

"Glorfindel? Is there something you haven't been telling me?" Laurind said, speaking up for the first time in awhile and arching an eyebrow at her brother.

"Like that he's so unspeakably, deliciously hot that no fan girl can conceive of anyone being able to resist him?" I replied for Glorfindel.

"Your opinion." Calenda pointed out.

"But the most trustworthy opinion of all. Also proof of the fan girl's belief." I said. "I did run away from him -"

"Twice." Glorfindel interjected.

"- and now I'm married to him!" I finished with an expansive gesture.

"Which makes him all yours, your very own, your -" Elrohir started, an evil glint in his eyes, but I clapped a hand over his mouth.

"No. No one but me does Gollum impressions." I hissed at Elrohir to emphasize my claim. Elrohir, amused, nodded in acceptance. "Feel free to do other impressions, though. Just not Jack Sparrow. Ecthelion would outclass you there, anyways."

"Ecthelion?" Elrohir asked, arching an eyebrow and glancing at the Elven lord. "How...?"

"I don't now, but it's scary, dude." I replied, then turned to Ecthelion. "Show him." Ecthelion looked at me blankly. "Aw, come on, every time I squeal and latch onto you it's because you've sounded like Jack Sparrow. So just pick one of those times and repeat what you said in the specific way you said it." Ecthelion thought for a moment, then cleared his throat before speaking.

"Actually, I borrowed it. Borrowed without permission. But with every intention of returning it to you." he said, in a perfection imitation of Jack Sparrow, down to the facial expression. Elrohir gaped at him.

"That's freaky." he almost whispered after a moment.

"Hence why I call him Jack." I said with a nod.

"I wondered about that." Elrohir said, then suddenly let out a jaw-cracking yawn.

"You've been picking up some human habits." I observed.

"Damn things are contagious - only disease an Elf can catch." Elrohir muttered.

"Doesn't change the fact that you need sleep. When did you last sleep?" Elladan said, almost scoldingly, as he eyed his brother.

"Um..." Elrohir's eyes went unfocused as he thought back, muttering to himself and absently counting on his fingers.

When Elrohir got past fourteen, Elladan shook his head and sighed. Then, in a distinctly MMC moment, he brought his hands up to his face, wiggled his fingers in the direction of Elrohir, and went, "Sleeeep..." There was little change in Elrohir's appearance, but Elladan and I moved forward as one and caught Elrohir as he fell asleep.

"He'll hate me for that in the morning, but he really needed it." Elladan said conversationally as I moved and grabbed his brother's feet, Elladan taking Elrohir's arms.

"Guest bedroom, two doors down from yours and Glorfindel's." Laurind supplied.

"My thoughts exactly." I said as Elladan and I started moving. Several of Glorfindel's siblings followed us to the room, out of curiosity, when they saw Elladan and I hauling a sleeping elf identical to Elladan through the corridors. Elladan and I quickly shooed them out of the room, however, and after getting Elrohir tucked into bed, headed back to the practice arena, only to be stopped by a mental comment from Glorfindel.

:Come to the dining hall - it's an easier place to discuss things.: Glorfindel said. :Plus all my family wants to know what's going on, and it's easier to explain it to them all at once in the dining hall.:

:Aye aye, Cap'n Crunch.: I replied. Glorfindel, after getting a brief mental explanation of the reference, replied something to the effect of 'munchies later, business now'. Only he phrased it somewhat dirtier. Gil-galad and Glorfindel seemed to have developed identical dirty minds, some days - the only difference was that Gil-galad's was more perverted and often expressed out loud. Glorfindel's dirty mind was well hidden, accessible only to me, which I approved of greatly.

So Elladan and I headed for the dining hall, where we had to explain to all of Glorfindel's very curious family that Elrohir had showed up, without his wife, because his wife had been captured. In true House-of-the-Golden-Flower style, they were immediately in an uproar and wanted to go rescue her, and couldn't understand when I explained that only six of us would be going back to rescue Kari, even with the language problem.

:Hmm...: I said thoughtfully to Glorfindel as I eyed his family, arguing amongst themselves about rescuing Kari.

:What are you pondering: Glorfindel asked warily.

:I'm trying to figure out how to explain machine guns, tear gas, and tanks.: I replied, showing Glorfindel mental images.

:Why not just explain to them the device you described to me? The A-bomb, I believe you called it: Glorfindel suggested after a moment.

:I suppose that'll do.: I said dubiously.

"Yo! Golden Flower people!" I exclaimed out loud, getting everyone's attention. "You want to know WHY we're only taking a small group and trying not to be noticed? Two words: weapons and technology."

"That's three." Ecthelion pointed out.

"The 'and' doesn't count, dummy." I said with irritation. Ecthelion blinked at me in surprise. "Yes, I'm annoyed. Why? Because I don't like the thought of all of you getting blown into pieces so tiny over such a large area that even an Orc couldn't smell them.

"Since you're all immortal Elves who haven't advanced much in technology and weaponry because there's no need, and the last time you saw humans, they were still poking each other with pointy pieces of metal and throwing rocks at buildings, I'll forgive your ignorance. But now you will listen to me, and listen well - because humans have changed since you last saw them. They've grown, and advanced in knowledge. They know how to heal diseases that probably no one in Valinor besides the Valar even know OF, let alone know how to cure. They also know how to kill and injure more people with one weapon than the Valar would even contemplate doing.

"There's a weapon that they created, less than a century ago, that when set off, will cause an explosion that will devastate the landscape for over four leagues around it. And after that, it will poison the land it destroyed, and the lands and people around it, for generations. It's only been used twice in active combat since it was developed, and every nation on earth has decided that it is too harmful to be used again.

"And that's just the most destructive weapon. There are smaller weapons, that anyone can buy and operate if they learn how, that will shoot out a small piece of metal going at speeds many times faster than an arrow. The small piece of metal can go through plate armour. Hell, they could probably go through a Balrog's skin...maybe even a Vala's. In the country where Kari is being held, EVERY PERSON has a right to own one of these weapons, and most of them make use of that right.

"And we won't even mention the weapons that the army of that nation has access to - the clouds of poisonous gases that will eat through your skin, the large tanks that are like bigger, stronger, more unstoppable versions of siege engines, and can shoot explosive devices - like the one Saruman used to bring down the walls of Helm's Deep, only more powerful - not to mention the damage the tank can do by just rolling over someone. And there are the weapons, like the small weapons that everyone in the country can own, that can fire hundreds of those pieces of metal in a MINUTE. One of those could most likely take down an entire charge. And that's just offensive weapons.

"Pressure-sensitive floors, where even the slightest difference in weight - even that of an elf - would set off an alarm. Special devices that act like remote eyes, allowing a small force to watch over a large building. Invisible beams of light that will set off an alarm if they are interrupted between their source and their destination...and most of those can be combined with offensive weapons to create something that can kill somebody without them ever actually seeing their enemies face!" I stopped and took a deep breath, realizing that I was ranting, and that everyone in the room was staring at me in wide-eyed surprise.

"No, now is not the time to fuck with humans. They have incredibly strong weapons, advanced knowledge, and superior forces - and not the wisdom to use any of it properly." I said calmly. "Six of us will go. Only six...and I'm not too sure we'll all return. But we will go, and we will try. Because while most humans have outgrown, or claim to have outgrown, torture and rape, they have other means at their disposal - and I, for one, don't want to see what happens when you give a human, with all their flaws, the power of an elf, and train them to kill an enemy." Silence reigned.

"Mom, can I change my mind about going?" Calenda asked nervously after a moment.

"Oh, don't worry. We'll only come up against those weapons if we're caught." I replied with amusement. "But if you want to, you can stay here. I'm not taking anyone back to earth who doesn't want to go. It might be a little tricky rescuing Kari with just me and Elrohir, but we could probably do it."

:Like I'd let you go without me.: Glorfindel stated mentally, shooting a slight glare my way, while Calenda glanced at her husband. Unspoken words were exchanged between my daughter and son-in-law, and then Calenda nodded.

"I've changed my mind about changing my mind. I'll still go." she said finally.

"Good." I replied cheerfully. :Now I'm going to go find some alcohol or sugar and hide in our room because that rant got me all depressed.: I added mentally to Glorfindel. He started to rise, and I felt his intention to follow me, but I shook my head. :Your family, and our friends, will still have a lot of questions. You're the only one here who can answer them.: I turned and left, going, as I had told Glorfindel, to find some alcohol before going to our room and huddling on the couch to drink, morbidly going over what Kari could be going through, and all the various problems of the human race.

In the background of my mind for several hours, I felt Glorfindel answering the questions of family and friends, with an occasional mental touch as he drew an answer from my memories, and the more personal caress and general feeling of love and comfort that he always added before he withdrew to return his attention to answering questions. Eventually, I felt the questions turn to planning and other practical matters, and then there was nothing from Glorfindel, except the sense of coming closer with every second. Then Glorfindel was there - and holding me as, for the first time since Boromir died, I cried out my grief over someone. Fortunately, this time, Glorfindel was willing and more than able to cart me to bed and take my mind off my troubles, if only for the night.

----To Be Continued...with Pervert!Glorfindel...----

-Authors Note-  
Tada. Chapter 2! Not AS funny as the last few, but still has some humour in it. Speaking of the humour - for those of you who may be interested, all the slash combinations mentioned are they're real. I've run across them in stories.

As for the not so funny stuff, anyone wishing to object to Rachel's cynical view of the human world - take into account she's lived, basically, in paradise for the past 5,000 years. Also, she's trying to scare the crap out of the family of someone who stood up to a Balrog.

Oh, and my apologies for the messed-upedness of the lists of 'useful info' at the end of last chapter. They are fixed now.

Aaand...I can't think of what else to say. So, I'll just do the traditional thanks to all the reviewers to whom I either didn't get around to replying to, or who I couldn't reply to for whatever reason. (It wouldn't hurt for some of you to log in. -hinthint-) And to all of you that read but didn't review - shame! Review this chapter while you're still redeemable! Eh, and whiel I'm being thankful, thanks to all the reviewers that I already thanked, too.

And now...I go. -flee-

Namarie!  
-Crimson Starlight 


	4. Chapter 3: Oz

-The Games of the Gods, Book Two: Playing the Game- 

-Disclaimer-  
Nothing belongs to me besides the characters of Rachel and Kari, and sometimes I wonder about them. The rest belongs to the brilliant genius that was JRR Tolkien...or reality.

-3: Oz -

The next morning we were all woken by Elrohir tearing strips out of Elladan. Almost literally, as he'd discovered a whip somewhere. Fortunately, he found that he had to use it to tie Elladan's feet together, otherwise his twin would run off, and he had caught Elladan in a sitting room, so there were no other weapons available except his voice. But the whole manor heard him as he ranted at his twin for putting him to sleep.

"Uh - Elrohir? You did need the sleep." I interjected after a moment of open-mouthed awe as I watched Elrohir go at his twin in full wrathful Elf lord mode - he was, truthfully, scarier than Elrond when he got mad. At my comment, however, Elrohir instantly calmed and turned to me.

"It's the principle of the matter. Before he came here, we always had a strict policy of not messing with each other's minds. Other people's, yes - each other's, no. He broke that rule, even if I was half-way asleep already, and he must be made to see the seriousness of what he has done." Elrohir then returned to reaming out his brother. I glanced at Glorfindel.

:Has to be your world.: Glorfindel stated. :The Silmarils are all gone, and anyways you never saw them, and yet you are unpredictable and odd, and now so is Elrohir.:

:Makes me wonder what chaos we'll be unleashing taking Gil-galad with us.: I mused. Thoughts of Gil-galad in a strip-club flashed through my head. Glorfindel shuddered. I eyed him, then mentally switched it so it was me doing the stripping instead of Gil-galad. Glorfindel eyed me appreciatively.

"Dirty old man." I said, poking Glorfindel.

"(A) Not man, elf. (B) I'm married to you, I can leer if I want." Glorfindel said solemnly, grabbing my wrist and pulling me to his side.

"I really don't want to know what goes on inside your heads." Laurind commented with a sigh from a few feet away, and I realized that the rest of the household was gathering out in the hallway to listen to Elrohir's rant.

"Eh, guess we'd better break this up." I said absently, looking at the twins. Elladan was cowering at the foot of a chair, the whip wrapped around his ankles, while Elrohir loomed over him, currently going on about the sanctity of promises between blood-brothers, especially twins.

"Hm, maybe a few more minutes? This is amusing, and I think Elrohir needs to take his frustration out on someone." Glorfindel said.

"He's waking the whole house, and it would be better if he saved his frustration for FBI agents." I replied, and Glorfindel gave a long-suffering sigh.

"Fine then." he muttered, crossing his arms across his chest and mock-sulking.

:I'll see if I can manage to keep the whip.: I said, grinning evilly. Glorfindel's eyes widened - after Kari's blithe remark in Lothlorien oh-so-long ago, Glorfindel had kept me well away from whips of any type. Fortunately for Glorfindel, that was purely Kari teasing, and I just tossed the whip away when I unwound it from Elladan's ankles. I didn't know how to use it, anyways. At any rate, Elrohir immediately protested when I freed his twin, but I gave him a stern look.

"You've woken up everyone, and I'm sure you've gotten your point across by now. Elladan will never do it again, right?" I turned to Elladan.

"Right." he said meekly. I returned my gaze to Elrohir.

"Right now, you have more important things to do than ream out your brother. Like eat. And say 'hi' to your parents. And sleep." I said.

"But Kari -" Elrohir started irritably, but I cut him off.

"Will have to hold out a little while longer. The USA is supposed one of the more civilized, advanced countries. I doubt they will resort to any extreme measures unless they've tried everything else first. And they're going to take awhile trying everything else, especially if Kari warns them, as she likely knows it is best to, that she'll go and fade away on them if they cause her unbearable grief or pain." I said. "Furthermore, we can't get ready within a day. It would be harmful to the entire venture to try. Now come get something to eat while we send someone to get your mother and father." Elrohir meekly allowed me to grab his wrist and lead him down to the dining hall. Elladan followed a safe distance away.

The morning calmed down after that, and all was calm until Celebrían and Elrond showed up in the afternoon. Elrond, most surprisingly, took serious umbrage at one of his daughters-in-law being kidnapped, and tried his damnedest to get us to take him with us. He seemed ready to tear through the entire US army with his bare hands if he had to - which, Glorfindel conceded, he could probably have done if Vilya had still worked. In one of my rare exercises of my power as mother-in-law to the High King, however, I had Gil-galad order him to remain in Valinor.

"I don't get why you're so vehement about Elrond remaining in Valinor." Glorfindel admitted to me later, as we took a walk in the gardens after the evening meal, which had been tense all around. Glorfindel's confusion was clear on his face, and I smiled wryly - sometimes my reasons were so obtuse that not even someone who could literally read my mind could understand them.

"Celebrían." I said by way of an explanation. "Though both she and Elrond have said they understood why I couldn't warn them of Celebrían's capture by orcs way back when, I still feel guilty about it. This rescue mission might be long, and is definitely dangerous - I just don't feel right taking Elrond from Celebrían again, even if he does want to come. Plus Rondy is angry enough that he might just assume the FBI is violating Kari the same way Celebrían once was, which I'm fairly confident they're not actually stupid enough to do."

"So there's some concerted thought behind this." Glorfindel said with a nod.

"Yep." I replied. "Amazingly enough." There was a moment of silence.

"It's just as well. I think for all that he was born half-elven, his brother chose to be counted as a Man, and how Elrond succored the line of Gondorian Kings, he has come to dislike Men." Glorfindel said softly. "The only reason he may have ever actually liked them was because some of them carried Elros' blood. I think Aragorn stealing his only daughter away cancelled any of his remaining sense of duty to Elros' descendants."

"Welcome to Valinor, Mr. Anderson." I quoted absently to myself, somewhat amused. "Remind me to bring back sunglasses for Rondy. And a script for The Matrix. It would be way too amusing to make a play of it with Elrond as Agent Smith." Glorfindel eyed me.

"You're going to bring back entirely too much stuff, I can tell." he said.

"Only if we have time." I said with a shrug. "With you coming with us, I won't have to bring back any clothing, and sunglasses are a small thing." I grinned up at Glorfindel.

"Well, in that case..." he said with an overly-dramatic relieved sigh.

"I'll just leave the Ferrari, desktop computer, and home theatre system for you to carry back." I said innocently, knowing completely that Glorfindel might have managed the desktop, but neither of the other two, and definitely not at the same time, carefully blocking what those objects were from my mind so Glorfindel wouldn't know. I cackled at the confusing look Glorfindel gave me. "I am going to have such FUN!" I exclaimed.

"Remember, we're going to rescue Kari." Glorfindel said sternly.

"If we do it right, we'll have time to enjoy ourselves once we do rescue her." I retorted. "And oh, the fun we'll have. Hm, I need to see if the 'elves drunk off Pepsi' supposition is correct. I wonder if Elrohir knows." I darted for the house, and heard Glorfindel give an exasperated sigh before following.

:I AM glad you're feeling better.: Glorfindel did say mentally as I headed for Elrohir's rooms.

:Better? I was worse: I sent back in innocent cheerfulness, as usual, denying grief unless I was outright faced with it. Glorfindel just sent back a mental caress, and then I had reached Elrohir, and had to explain to him why I wanted to know if Pepsi got elves drunk before he informed me that no, it didn't - but it did make them hyper. Truly, scarily hyper. Which led to tales of what Elrohir and Kari had done while hyper from Pepsi and coca-cola - Elrohir was of the opinion that, if Rome HAD been built in a day, two hyper elves could have accomplished it.

At any rate, after that day followed a hurried move to the coast where a month of frantic planning and packing commenced. Most, if not all, of the MMC showed up during that time to either help or offer words of encouragement, which was nice, and they all promised to hold down the fort and keep the craziness in Valinor alive. Even Tulkas and Orome stopped by - though they were more somber than the other MMC members, as they came as official representatives of the Valar. They also had some nifty daggers for everyone, as well as a funky necklace for me. Only no one but me and the Valar knew about that necklace, as Tulkas gave it to me one night when I was alone, watching the sea and thinking.

"It will allow you to contact us once." he explained. "It will also mask the glow of you and your companions."

"Aw, and I was looking forward to seeing a Glowing Glory again." I said with mock sadness as I took the necklace. It was a simple chain, with an eight-pointed star for a pendant, and seemed to be made of a silvery-blue metal. "Mithril?" I asked when I noticed its unusual colour, and Tulkas nodded.

"Should you lose it, or a human wear it, it will lose all it's powers and be transformed into a simple silver necklace." he said gravely.

"Right, so, no losing the pretty, useful necklace." I said with an emphatic nod. Tulkas smiled slightly, and then said goodnight and headed off, leaving me to stand, staring thoughtfully at the necklace with the sudden feeling that I was making one of the biggest mistakes of my long, long life in going.

----To Be Continued...with the brave ship Enterprise!----

-Authors Note-  
Sorry for the short chapter, I'll try and post a longer one on Sunday...If I'm not incredibly hung over from my 19th birthday celebrations. Horray for becoming legal drinking age? Ah well.

So, thank you muchly to all those who review - especially those who signed in to review! This new 'reply to review' thing has going is actually one of the better things they've done in a looooong time. Well, the strange 'forum' feature seems worthy of more investigation, too.

Now, I believe, I shall leave you, with the wise advice that you should Review! _-nods sagely-_

-Crimson Starlight


	5. Chapter 4: Return

-The Games of the Gods, Book Two: Playing the Game-

-Disclaimer-  
Nothing belongs to me besides the characters of Rachel and Kari, and sometimes I wonder about them. The rest belongs to the brilliant genius that was JRR Tolkien...or reality.

-4: Return -

"I swear I saw a cruise ship!" I insisted.

"It was an oil tanker!" Elrohir shot back.

"It was not! It was white! Since when do they paint oil tankers white!" I demanded.

"It wasn't white! That was the sun reflecting off of it into your eyes!" Elrohir exclaimed.

"Children!" Gil-galad interrupted with exasperation. "Does it really matter?" Elrohir and I glanced at each other.

"Well, no, not really..." I admitted.

"Then let's just say that we'll never know and leave it at that, hm?" Gil-galad said sternly, resting his hands on his hips and looking very much like a stern mother scolding her/his children. I giggled at the mental image of Gil-galad in an apron and dress, holding a wooden spoon. Gil-galad just sighed, shook his head, and stalked off.

"I think we annoyed him." I stage whispered to Elrohir.

"Really? I thought he was amused." Elrohir replied in kind, and we both ducked as Gil-galad chucked a fish at us. Yes, a fish. It had become the projectile of choice onboard our little ship ever since an unfortunate fishing incident that had resulted in Ecthelion getting hit in the head with a tuna. That had prompted Elrohir and I to recall that a once-favourite threat of Kari's involved beating someone with a trout, and we had felt obliged to carry the tradition onwards. Only no one on board had actually believed that we'd hit them with a trout, so we'd actually had to throw a few fish at them before they took us seriously. Which, of course, led to the quibble that we hadn't actually thrown trout at them, but my response to that was that I couldn't tell a tuna from a salmon from a trout anyways, so who cared?

Yes, we were all going slightly more crazy than normal on the passage from Valinor to Earth. When we'd finally set out, we'd all been so eager to reach Earth that none of us had stopped to realize that it would take us several weeks to get there, just as it had taken several weeks to go from (Middle-)Earth to Valinor. So we'd been all excited and high-strung, and as the days dragged by, it led to some pretty ridiculous things. The argument about the oil tanker/cruise ship had sprung up when, after three weeks, while Elrohir and I were on watch one day, we swore we saw a ship on the horizon. It was probably just us being hopeful that we'd finally crossed over the barrier between the Straight Road and the plain ol' ocean, but Elrohir and I in particular both wanted so badly to get to Earth and rescue Kari that we had clung firmly to the belief that it was another ship. Tension had created the argument about what type it was.

"So I just thought of something." Calenda said, suddenly dropping down from the rigging in front of Elrohir and I. We both squawked and jerked backwards.

"Do not DO that!" I exclaimed - Calenda had proved especially adept at maneuvering in the ship's rigging, and had taken to dropping down out of it unexpectedly and scaring everyone, like she just had with Elrohir and I.

"Sorry Mother." she said with a roll of her eyes. "Anyways. We've been listening to your and Elrohir's tales about Earth for the entire journey - and the month before - and I just realized something. From what you've said, both our ship and our clothing will stick out like an Orc in Valinor. And yet we plan on sneaking into one of these military bases, supposed heavily guarded against intruders. How?"

"There are people who like to recreate the 'good old days', which is how we'll explain the ship, and we have the clothes that Kari and Elrohir packed into the ship when they were getting ready to come to Valinor." I replied.

"Where do you think we got the hat for Jack?" Elrohir said, nodded towards the helm, where Ecthelion was currently steering. It turned out that Kari had somehow managed to buy a replica of Jack Sparrow's hat in the 'Pirates of the Caribbean' movie, and when Elrohir and I had discovered it while searching through the clothing Kari had packed, we had instantly given it to Ecthelion and insisted he wear it while he was on the ship - which was, by the way, named 'Enterprise'. Just because it sent Elrohir and I into convulsions of silent laughter whenever it was mentioned. Either that or we started quoting the 'Star Trek: Generations' movie. Data's life-form song was a particular favourite, as was random personification of objects which were then called 'Mr. Tricorder, Prototype insert any number here - and sometimes letters, too'.

"Oh. Right." Calenda said with a frown.

"But don't worry, we'll still have to go shopping!" I insisted cheerfully. Elrohir groaned.

"I should never have mentioned that Kari and I still had a large amount of money left." he said.

"No, you shouldn't have. But you did, so too bad." I said with an impish grin - though it truly was a good thing that Elrohir and Kari hadn't spent even half of the money they'd saved up, as that eliminated the worry of having to get a hold of some money in order to have some place other than the ship to stay in.

Actually, all our plans were somewhat contingent on where we ended up, no matter that we had quite a large amount of money at our disposal. Elrohir had left from the west coast of North America, but all the Elves before him had left from what was the equivalent of the west coast of Europe, and when the Noldor had gone from Valinor to Arda way back when, they'd ended up on the same coast most Elves left from - the equivalent of the west coast of Europe. So there was a strong supposition that we'd end up on the coast of Europe. This was, however, slightly inconvenient for us, and so both Elrohir and I had spoken with Tulkas and Orome about it before we'd left and asked them to see if they could do anything about it. We were all hoping they had, as it would mean several more months of sailing otherwise.

Anyways, once we got to the USA, we had a very simple plan. Return to Kari and Elrohir's house - there was a convoluted reason as to why they hadn't sold it yet - find out the lay of the land, see if we could track down any way to get into Area 51, and then, one way or another, move in and snatch Kari. Elrohir seemed extremely confident that we'd find some type of information about how to get inside, which led me to believe that he had some contacts he wasn't telling us about. Which of course led to teasing. Everything led to teasing between Elrohir and I. And half the teasing no-one else could understand, which made it all twice as amusing to Elrohir and I.

In the end, it turned out that either there was some weird navigating going on, or Tulkas and Orome had pulled through for us, as around a month after we'd left Valinor, San Fransisco came into sight. At that time, Elrohir and I realized that not only had we ended up on the west coast of America, but we'd showed up INSIDE the coast guards major border patrol - which we'd forgotten until that moment, since Elrohir had been too concerned about stopping for the coast guard when he'd been leaving last time. Elrohir and I both promised to each other that we were going to start a church to Tulkas and Orome while we were here as thanks, and then directed the boat to be steered along the coastline to Elrohir and Kari's cottage, where the boat had originally been docked before Elrohir had made his run to Valinor.

Then, we set about changing clothes. Which sounds a lot simpler than it was. Especially since we had to first drag everyone away from the various modern appliances in the cabin before one of them hurt themselves - they seemed to be attracted to all the things with sharp parts, or parts that heated up or cooled down rapidly. It was sort of amusing, in an aggravating sort of way - if one was ever bored, and had a spare Valinorian Elf lying around, introducing them to blenders, stoves, and freezers would be an excellent way to stop being bored reeeeal quick.

Even once we got people into the bedrooms changing, most everyone had a complaint about their clothes, and we spent quite some time swapping pieces of clothing before everyone was satisfied. Then Calenda and I had to spend about five minutes just staring dreamily at everyone else (mostly our husbands, of course)...because they all looked damned fine. Gil-galad was, scarily enough, pulling off a perfect cowboy look, Ecthelion had gone for a more sophisticated, casual-suit type look (having, sadly, ditched the Jack Sparrow hat), Elladan was wearing (of course) bright Hawaiian-print clothing (and he knew exactly how amusing it was for him to be in such clothing - that's why he was wearing it), while Glory and Elrohir had opted for plain old jeans and a t-shirt (Glorfindel's t-shirt, amusingly enough, read 'Pervy Elf Fancier'...I'd actually heard him try and get rid of it, but Elrohir hadn't let him). Calenda actually tried to drag Gil-galad off to one of the rooms, but Elrohir and Elladan dragged her back, much to her dismay. And Gil-galad's dismay, too, actually, since Calenda was sporting a very tight pair of jeans...along with a few other clothes that actually made her sort of match her cowboy-ish husband. As for me, well, there was a reason Glorfindel was wearing jeans and a t-shirt - he'd just asked me what type of clothing I liked and gone off of that.

Anyways, once we were all changed, we riffled around in Kari and Elrohir's kitchen and found some non-perishables to combine with the leftover food from the ship journey in the hopes of creating a palatable meal. Surprisingly, thanks to the almost 50,000 years of cooking experience we had between us all, we succeeded in our endeavor. After eating, we headed out to load our things into Kari and Elrohir's vehicle - or at least the vehicle they kept at the cabin, which handily enough turned out to be a nice, big truck.

"We needed it to transport all the junk Kari wanted to bring back with us." Elrohir said dryly as he and I started loading our stuff into the truck. The other five were too busy eyeing the truck suspiciously to help - we'd told them about the vehicles of this day and age, so they didn't ask any silly questions like where the horses were, but they weren't entirely trusting of a piece of machinery which we told them could go as fast, if not faster, than a ship at sea, only on land, and without any visible means of propelling it.

Eventually, Elrohir and I convinced everyone else to pile into the truck, and we headed off. Glory, Ecthelion, Calenda, Gil-galad and Elladan, of course, immediately let out startled exclamations about the speed, and then glued their faces to the window.

"Where is your and Kari's house, anyways?" I asked Elrohir after I saw that our other companions were suitably occupied - Elrohir and I had nabbed the front of the truck, crammed Glorfindel in behind us, and then everyone else was in the far back of the truck - which actually had one of those roof-thingies over it - and we'd left the window between open so all could hear, if they so desired. Most of them were too occupied watching the scenery go by to pay us any attention, though.

"Depends on which one you're talking about. I'm heading for the one in LA, currently, because I know a few people there that could help." Elrohir said.

"Ha, I knew you had contacts!" I declared, but Elrohir just shrugged - he'd been steadily sobering up since we set foot on dry land again, and now seemed to be entirely focused on finding and rescuing Kari.

"Are you getting anything from Kari?" I asked softly after a moment.

"No." he said, and the pain and worry Elrohir put into that single word was heart-wrenching. Silence fell. Then Glorfindel, having become tired of the scenery and now being bored and uncomfortable, set about wriggling through the window into the back of the truck, since there was more room back there. I took the opportunity to smack his butt a few times...which resulted in him lifting the lyrics to a few annoying traveling songs from my mind, causing me to first squawk in alarm, and then groan.

Shortly, all the passengers in the back of the truck, having been hauled away from the windows by Glorfindel, were to be heard singing '100 bottles of mirovur on the wall'. It was amusing enough for the first couple verses, as Glorfindel did a passable imitation of a conductor directing a chorus, but then it just because what that song always is - annoying. Elrohir and I decided discretion was the better part of valor, and shut the connecting window. The song quieted by only a few decibels.

After a short tactical discussion, Elrohir and I then determined that the best defense was a good offence, so we opened the window the back again and flipped on the radio. To the rock station. Ecthelion was the first to break under that, leaning through the window far enough that he could push a button - any button - on the stereo. He happened to hit the button that changed from radio to CD - and Britney Spears began blasting over the speakers, before Elrohir quickly flipped the stereo off. I stared at Elrohir in shock, while Ecthelion returned to the back of the truck, everyone back there sighing in relief.

"You...listen to Britney Spears?" I finally managed to ask.

"No, it's Kari's CD." Elrohir said flatly.

"Liar. She hates Britney Spears." I accused.

"No, it's hers!" Elrohir said defensively.

"I don't believe you." I declared. Elrohir glanced at me, and then sighed.

"We ran into Britney Spears once, and she flirted with me for an hour before giving me a signed CD - seemed completely oblivious to both the ring on my finger and Kari. Kari has since played the CD every opportunity she gets, just to aggravate me. So, it is Kari's CD." he said, glancing at me in irritation, as I had started laughing halfway through his explanation. He finally just shook his head and started ignoring me, making it a rather boring drive down to LA. Well, until I found a pad of paper and a pen, and then coerced random people in the back to play random traveling games with me - when they weren't oooing and aaahing over the scenery again, that is.

Elrohir finally announced that we were nearing his and Kari's house, however, and I began to pay attention - and blinked in surprise at my surroundings. I could see maybe two houses from where I was - because the houses surrounding us were not houses, they were estates, and you could only ever see one or two at a time from any give spot on the ground because they and their grounds were just that big.

"Wow. How much money DO you two have, anyways?" I asked, peering around myself.

"Well, in the banks, only about ten million." Elrohir said with a frown. "Our total assets, however, are somewhere over two billion. We have it set up to be distributed to various charities and scientific research organizations once we 'die'." I gaped at Elrohir, and then shook my head.

"Of course. Kari would have been able to play the stock market like a puppet." I said, somewhat dazedly.

"Mm, indeed." Elrohir said, and then paused before continuing, "And we're actually responsible for Tolkien writing the books that you read about the War of the Ring."

"Really?" I said, staring at Elrohir. Elrohir squirmed uncomfortably.

"Well, see, I got drafted to the war, and got wounded, and ended up talking deliriously to Tolkien." he said. "He actually had most of Middle-Earth already made up - I think the Valar might have been subtly influencing him for whatever reason, remind me to ask them about that when we get back - but I rambled on about the last time I was wounded so badly, which was during the War of the Ring, and...Well, you can guess the rest."

"He took the story you told him and set it in 'his' world, and tada." I said with amusement, and Elrohir nodded as he pulled into a driveway of a particularly graceful - and generally Elvish-looking - manor. He stopped at the gate and keyed in the access code, and then we were on our way into the estate. A butler met us at the door to the main building.

"Welcome back, Master Perethil." he said solemnly. Glorfindel and Gil-galad suppressed snickers at the name.

"It's good to be back, Bernard." Elrohir said, shooting a warning glare at the two Elf Lords behind them.

"How was your trip?" Bernard inquired politely as he led us through the house to a sitting room.

"Interesting, to say the least. Has anyone been looking for me?" Elrohir asked.

"Quite." Bernard replied. "Several government agencies were here looking for you." He gave a disdainful sniff. "Made a horrible mess of the floors - I had to throw out a few carpets. Still, they were better than the army."

"The army was here?" I asked, my eyebrows shooting upwards, and then turned to Elrohir with an appreciative whistle. "Well, that settles it. This has gone beyond the FBI. Looks like we're dealing with the entire US government now." Elrohir sighed and nodded as we entered the sitting room Bernard apparently had in mind. The rest of our group immediately began investigating the place, but Elrohir and I sat.

"What did you tell them, and has there been anything on the news about it?" Elrohir asked the butler.

"I told them nothing, Master Perethil." Bernard replied stiffly, looking highly insulted that Elrohir even had to ask, but then admitted, "I knew nothing to tell them, anyways."

"And the news?" Elrohir pressed.

"Nothing, Master Perethil." Bernard answered. "Not even in the tabloids."

"That's something, at least." Elrohir said with a frown. Silence fell for a moment, as both Elrohir and I thought about what one was to do when the entire government was hunting you but wasn't admitting that they were hunting you, and you didn't want the public at large to know that they were hunting you because then they would probably WANT you hunted. Bernard broke the silence finally.

"If I may inquire, Master Perethil - will Mistress Perethil be joining us shortly?" he asked carefully, and Elrohir winced, a haunted look entering his face.

"Mistress Perethil is the reason that the government agencies and the army were here." I said, hoping to spare Elrohir some of the pain, while at the same time, my mind was working furiously as I came up with an alternate story to tell this butler - loyal though he may be - so that, should he be questioned again, he would know nothing that the government wished to know. "They have erroneously concluded that she was responsible for trying to smuggle several tactical missiles to Cuba." Bernard let out a startled exclamation, and Elrohir sighed.

"This is a fact." he said with a small spark of amusement, and then started and suddenly stood, glancing nervously around the room. He turned to me then, and said something that, at first, sounded like gibberish. I stared at him, not understanding.

"Is nole?" I asked in confusion, and then a long-buried memory surfaced as I recalled the made-up language Kari and I had created, and my eyes widened. "OH! Izno'l!" I exclaimed, then looked at everyone else, and glanced at Elrohir curiously. He shook his head, and then turned to Bernard.

"I'm afraid we must leave now, Bernard." he said with a regretful sigh. "This was but a stop on our way, I'm afraid. It was nice to see you."

"Surely you can stay for afternoon tea, Master Perethil?" Bernard asked with a frown.

"I'm afraid not - we really must be going." Elrohir insisted, and then he and I ushered the rest of our - confused - group out of the manor and back to the truck. This time, I forced everyone into the back, and sat there myself, while Elrohir drove out of the estate at a break-neck speed. Within half an hour, we were far away from his and Kari's house, trapped in rush hour traffic on our way to down-town LA. Finally, we managed to pull into a Dairy Queen Restaurant's parking lot, and after ordering everyone ice cream, we sat in the truck, and Elrohir and I explained about surveillance, bugs, and other reasons why it wasn't safe to return to any of Elrohir and Kari's houses.

"There's one exception to this avoidance, however." Elrohir said once we'd finished. "In case of an emergency like this one, Kari and I put a million dollars and an apartment building in New York under a different name." Elrohir glanced up at me with amusement. "Your name, in fact. We had to clear up some confusion with the bank, since they thought that we actually did mean you." I stared at him blankly for a moment, then squawked and fell off the tailgate of the truck, just narrowly avoiding hitting my head against the concrete. After I recovered, I glared at Elrohir accusingly.

"You scared the hell out of me! Gods, did you two PURPOSELY dress like some misbegotten, ugly vampires!" I demanded, and started throwing chunks of grass at Elrohir, who yelped and tried to hide behind Glorfindel.

"What happened now?" Elladan piped up, looking curious.

"In order to clear up the 'misunderstanding' with the bank, Elrohir and Kari had to come to a meeting with me and one of the bank managers." I growled. "They disguised themselves thoroughly - and scared the bejeezers out of me. They were the creepiest, scariest, all around evilest looking people I'd ever run across. Not to mention butt ugly." Elrohir grinned.

"Well, Kari HAD just come off of being a make-up artist in Hollywood, and we couldn't very well have your younger self recognizing Kari, now, could we?" he said.

"She is a disturbed freak." I muttered, sitting on the tailgate of the truck again and scowling.

"Consider it delayed revenge for the purple." Elrohir said with a smirk, and I glared harder at him. After a moment, Gil-galad broke the silence.

"So we shall be going to this 'New York', then?" he asked. Elrohir shook his head.

"It's too far away, and besides, Kari and I haven't been on that side of the US in years. I know of no one there that could, or would, help us. All our contacts for this era are here." he said. "So we'll have to tap into our bank account and rent an apartment here. But that limits our funds considerably."

"So no black-market buying of P90's for the entire group?" I said, a smile twitching at the corners of my mouth.

"No, I'm afraid not." Elrohir drawled in reply. "Though that is a good idea."

"Well, it would probably be a good idea to buy Kevlar body armour for everyone, anyways." I said. "And THAT costs a pretty penny."

"Mmm, about a grand a vest. If you get it legally." Elrohir agreed, and I made a face.

"I thought you said armour isn't any use in this Age?" Calenda asked curiously.

"The armour you're used to isn't of any use, no." I replied. "But this Age has developed its own type of armour to deal with its own weapons. It's about as reliable as the armour you're used to, at any rate - though it usually only comes in vests, protecting the heart and chest area."

"Helmets, too." Elrohir added.

"But we can discuss this later, once we find out more about where Kari's being kept and how to get there." I said. "And speaking of that, we'd better get moving."

"Yes. Off to the bank, then the seedy side of LA to rent an apartment." Elrohir said, heading for the front of the truck. The rest of us scurried into our places - Elladan claimed the front seat on this ride - and we were off to the nearest bank.

----To Be Continued...with furniturization (AKA, Rachel making up words again)!----

-Authors Note-  
So, for those of you who didn't see the review I left on my own reviews page, the reason I didn't manage to update on Sunday is that I got sick. On Saturday. Worst timing a cold has EVER had. Not only hit on my 19th birthday, but on my last day of work before four straight days off. So, instead, I got five days off and have spent most of them sick and/or recovering from being sick. Joy.

Anyways. This cold resulted in me getting severely behind in all my review replying - I'm not sure who I've replied to, and who I haven't, so as a result, I'm just going to do a general thank-you to everyone, and reply to all the reviews for the next chapter diligently! Those that aren't anonymous, at any rate. -peer- I like to leave anonymous reviews on, but please, dear readers, I like it better when you sign in! It enables me to express my personnal heartfealt gratitude for each and every one of your reviews!

Now...I go! -ninja flee-  
-Crimson Starlight 


	6. Chapter 5: Searching

-The Games of the Gods, Book Two: Playing the Game- 

-Disclaimer-  
Nothing belongs to me besides the characters of Rachel and Kari, and sometimes I wonder about them. The rest belongs to the brilliant genius that was JRR Tolkien...or reality.

-5: Searching-

"Blood."

"Alcohol."

"Blood!"

"Brandy!"

"Blood!"

"Wine!"

"Does it matter?" Ecthelion asked with a sigh.

"Well, no." I admitted.

"Not really." Elrohir confirmed, and with that, we stopped debating over the source of the mysterious brownish-red stain we'd discovered on the floor of our new apartment. Instead, we returned to looking around, and discovered that, considering we were in a neighborhood were you were more likely to get mugged than not if you took a walk, it was actually fairly decent. Which was just as well, as Elrohir had been unable to scrounge up any other place that could hold seven people.

It was still rather small for seven people, though, being just a simple two-bedroom place, with one bathroom, and a kitchen crammed into the corner of the living/dining room, where everyone was currently standing. The nondescript brown floors, walls and ceiling hid most of the damage to the apartment, but the appliances showed the wear, as they were now rusted so badly that you could barely tell they were once white - and we won't even mention the mud that we found in both kitchen and bathroom sinks. Elrohir and I hadn't summoned up enough courage yet to check on the status of the toilet or bathtub.

And anyways, the bathroom, and one of the bedrooms, were missing their doors - and the other bedroom, which Elrohir and I had peeked into before shutting the door and refusing anyone else entrance, had a large mirror on the ceiling, and a bed with tattered, bright pink covers and rusty handcuffs locked around one of the metal bed frame's support posts. It didn't take much imagination to realize who used to live in this place. On the plus side, however, there were solid iron bars over the windows and the main door to the apartment was sturdy, with six different locks on it, which Elrohir and I both now had the keys for - and, thanks to some sleight of hand, the land lord only had keys for five of the locks. The place did seem solid enough, if a little dirty and lacking in furnishings - besides the necessary stuff for the kitchen and bathroom, the only furnishings in the apartment were two rusty beds and a couch. There weren't even any lights - there was a socket for a bare bulb in each room, but the light bulbs themselves were long gone.

"So, what shall we do now that we have a base of operations?" I asked as I flopped down onto the very old and ratty couch, which sat on the far side of the apartment, facing the kitchen. A disturbing creak came from the couch, as well as a suspiciously mouse-sounding squeak. Glorfindel eyed the couch and fingered one of his knives, obviously debating whether it was worth the effort to go mouse-hunting, while everyone else took it as a sign to continue their boycott of the furniture. And boycott of the floor, in Calenda's case, who was rather amusing in the way she minced around the apartment, watching the floor warily. I had a running bet going with Glorfindel as to how long before Calenda decided to use her husband in her endeavor to spend as little time as possible in contact with the floor.

"Well, I was going to go out tonight and contact a few people I know. Figured I'd take Jack and/or Glory along as 'hired muscle'." Elrohir said with a wry smile.

"Awwww, can't I come?" I asked with a pout.

"Not unless you want a night with you to be part of the price for the information." Elrohir said dryly. I pretended to ponder that for a moment, and everyone else looked at me in surprise, except Glorfindel, who knew that I would never even consider it.

"No, I guess I'll stay here, then." I said.

"Actually, I have a better idea than you staying here." Elrohir said, and tossed a credit card my way. Glancing at it, I was slightly disconcerted to find that it bore my name. "Go shopping, buy some furniture and food. I, personally, would rather burn the two beds than sleep on them, and I don't know how you can stand sitting on that couch."

"Second-hand stores for the furniture, I'm guessing?" I said with a chuckle, and Elrohir nodded. "But don't you need the truck?" Elrohir shook his head.

"No, the people I need to see are within walking distance. The truck would probably get stolen where I'm going, anyways." Elrohir said with a chuckle.

"And it won't here?" I asked, arching an eyebrow.

"No, this neighborhood knows better than to mess with me." Elrohir said with a smirk. "So as long as either Elladan or I stay around here, they won't touch my stuff." I eyed Elrohir for a moment.

"Alright, who did you kill?" I demanded.

"No one!" Elrohir protested, looking extremely offended. Then he looked at me with the most innocent expression he could muster and added, "I may have caused several hired 'muscle men' to gain nicknames like 'lefty', 'one-eye' or 'peg leg', however." I chuckled.

"And how did you do this?" I asked.

"With a dull, rusty butter knife!" Elrohir declared, then, after a pause, amended, "Or a machete I stole from one of the men now bearing one of those nicknames. Take your pick."

"Dull, rusty butter knife it is!" I said cheerfully, and then shuddered. "As long as you didn't scoop anyone's eyeballs out with rusty spoons or forks." Elrohir snickered.

"You have very gruesome imaginations." Gil-galad put in at this point, and Ecthelion and Calenda, looking slightly green, quickly agreed. Ecthelion, at least, had seen wars, of course, but that was usually a little more clean-cut than using rusty flatware to mutilate people.

"Actually, they're talking about something Kari wrote." Glorfindel said with a mixture of horror and surprise, 'hearing' the memory in my head.

"Say what?" Elladan asked, looking curious.

"Nothing, nothing. I'll explain - or show - you later." I said, dismissing it with a wave of my hand. "First off, we need to decide how to furniturize this place."

"You mean furnish?" Elrohir asked.

"Whatever." I said dismissively, and then added after a pause, "We also need to find some fresh peas when we go out shopping."

"Peas?" Elrohir asked in confusion.

"Yeah, did you know that there are no peas in Valinor?" I asked with a frown. I had been quite shocked to discover that a few centuries after arriving in Valinor. "I tell ya, you never really notice something until it's gone. And I've been craving fresh, garden peas for...well, ever since I was pregnant with Calenda." Elrohir chuckled.

"We'll have to buy some packages of pea seeds for our return voyage." he said.

"Indeed we shall. Now, furniture? What do we have that's usable?" I asked. And the couch chose that moment to collapse underneath me, sending three mice scurrying for cover, squeaking furiously. Calenda let out a slight yelp and jumped onto Gil-galad's back, causing him to sputter out an 'oof!'. "Right, nothing it is." I said, eyeing the direction the mice had gone in. "What do we need, then? And what's the credit limit on this card?"

"Limit is 20k." Elrohir said. "As for what we need..." Elrohir pondered for a moment.

"Two double beds." I said with a frown. "And a hideaway - you and Elrohir can have that. And another couch for Ecthelion."

"How about just three separate couches?" Elladan asked with a wary look at his brother. He obviously didn't know what a hideaway was, but the thought of he and Elrohir sharing anything at the moment apparently brought up memories of my description of incest.

"Because we'll be lucky to find one long enough to fit an Elf-Lord, let alone three. If you insist, however, we'll try looking for cots long enough." I said.

"We'll need the extra sitting space of having two couches, though." Elrohir put in. "Unless all of us here fancy sitting on the floors?" Calenda, still clinging to her husbands back, shuddered.

"No thank you." she said.

"Alright. We'll probably still want an extra chair or two, and we'll need a decent coffee table. Lights, obviously." Elrohir said, then did a circle around the main room, eyeing everything critically. "A new fridge wouldn't hurt."

"That's electronics; we'll deal with those tomorrow." I interrupted. "Tonight, we'll just focus on basic furniture and some quick food. Did Mr. Landlord say whether or not the stove worked?"

"'Off and on', I believe his words were." Elrohir said with a wry smile.

"Alright, take out it is." I said, and then suddenly grinned. "Valar, I'm dieing for some authentic, greasy, unhealthy American pizza." Elrohir chuckled.

"Please, we really don't want to find out if an Elf can have a heart attack." he said.

"Once can't hurt!" I quipped in reply. "Now, who's going to go where? Obviously I'm going shopping, Elladan's staying here, and you're going to look for your contacts, but what about everybody else?"

"Hmm, Jack can come with me," Elrohir said, completely ignoring Ecthelion's annoyed 'I have a name, you know!'. "And I vote Glorfindel stays here, so that between him and Elladan, we'll know if either you or I get in trouble. Plus they can use the time to clear the remaining furnishings out. That means Gil-galad and Calenda can go with you."

"I get two and you're only taking one?" I asked, cocking my head to the side.

"Well, you're dealing with the heavy stuff." Elrohir said with a shrug, and then turned to Ecthelion. "How many knives and weapons can you conceal on your person?" Ecthelion blinked in surprise, and then frowned.

"42." Glorfindel answered for him.

"Really?" Elrohir asked in surprise, and Glorfindel nodded.

"We, um, had a little contest one night in Gondolin." Glorfindel said, suddenly looking uncomfortable. Curious, I mentally 'pushed' at Glorfindel, trying to get him to explain the whole story. He shot me an exasperated look, but then, when he noticed that the rest of the group - except for Ecthelion, who was trying his best to be swallowed by the floor - were giving him similar curious looks, he caved. "We got drunk. Very drunk. And we decided to test Turgon's guards, as they're supposed to see to the removal of all weapons on someone's being when entering the King's private rooms. So we hid as many knives, daggers, swords, and other sharp objects on ourselves as we could. I managed around 39, Ecthelion got 42."

"And we only know that because of the nice, long lecture we got from Turgon the next morning about trying to sneak so many weapons into his quarters." Ecthelion said, sounding miserable. "The only comfort was that Turgon's personal body guards got reamed out, as well, because they missed two knives on me and three on Glorfindel."

"You tried to sneak 81 various weapons into Turgon's chambers?" Gil-galad asked in surprise, and Ecthelion and Glorfindel nodded glumly.

"I can still remember the vibrant, pulsing pink of the sword and knife handles that he forced us to carry with us for the next two years." Ecthelion said with a grimace. Elrohir and Elladan shook their head and chuckled.

"Well, now you get to see if you can do it again." Elrohir said. "Since the more weapons you can have on you during my little foray, the better. You probably won't have to use even one, but if you have a few visible, and a few suspicious bulges, my contacts will realize you're not to be trifled with."

"Just who are these contacts, anyways? The mob?" I asked.

"Um..." Elrohir glanced around, and I gaped at him.

"You're kidding me. What the hell are you doing involved with the mob!" I demanded.

"Well, we needed to change identities every twenty years!" Elrohir said defensively. "And that's not exactly as easy in the twentieth century as it was back in Minas Tirith for you."

"Hm, I suppose not. Still, it strikes me as risky." I said.

"It would be, if they didn't know that Kari and I could beat the crap out of anyone and everyone in their organization." Elrohir said with a sigh, looking out the window mournfully. Realizing he was thinking about Kari again, I grabbed Ecthelion, Gil-galad and Glorfindel and ordered them to go get our stuff from the truck. We didn't have much, just some clothes and weapons, but the weapons in particular took up about six bags. We WERE dealing with five Elf-Lords, each at least over ten thousand years old, who had been collecting weapons all their lives, after all. Elladan I sent to his brother, and they were soon standing in a corner of the main room talking quietly, while Calenda was drafted to help me take stock of what was in the kitchen - essentially, cockroaches - and to arrange the baggage that the other three Elf-lords brought in.

When all the baggage was in the apartment, Ecthelion started equipping himself, needing only a little help from the rest of us - he and Glorfindel wincing and demanding we get a weapons rack while we were out after Calenda and I unceremoniously dumped their weapons on the floor - and soon, Ecthelion and Elrohir were heading out to meet Elrohir's mob contact, and I gave Glorfindel a kiss before taking Calenda and Gil-galad with me as I headed out to buy furniture.

Several hours later, a very aggravated Gil-galad dragged Calenda and I back to our apartment. We had gotten all of the furniture we needed, and gotten the pizza needed for supper...but I'd used the opportunity to introduce Calenda to the joys of driving your significant other mad by shopping. It was actually a stretch for me, since I didn't like shopping all that much, but I figured it was something Calenda needed to know.

"Your wife took lessons from Morgoth, Glorfindel." Gil-galad growled as we walked into the apartment.

"Really? I thought it was rather amusing." Glorfindel replied with a grin - he had been watching occasionally through my eyes, since he and Elladan were rather bored in the apartment, all by themselves, and we'd wanted his opinion on the weapons racks. Gil-galad muttered something, then made a dive for the bags of weapons on the other side of the room, only to be stopped by Calenda grabbing onto the back of his shirt and asking him sweetly if he'd like to supervise Elladan and Glorfindel as they unloaded the furniture. Since the only true cure for the misery of being taken shopping is to pass that misery on to others, Gil-galad gleefully agreed. Of course, this arrangement eventually resulted in a wrestling match in the hallway, and soon Gil-galad was helping as well as 'supervising'.

We had all the furniture in the apartment and arranged by the time Elrohir and Ecthelion returned. Glorfindel and Gil-galad were just finishing arranging the weapons on the weapons racks, in fact, while Calenda, Elladan and I were sitting on our new(ish) couches, snacking on pizza while I explained things that they'd seen since they came to this world. Glorfindel and Gil-galad were, naturally, eavesdropping on that particular conversation, but we all stopped short when Elrohir and Ecthelion walked in the door.

"Well?" I demanded after a moment of silence.

"Nothing on Kari precisely." Ecthelion answered for Elrohir, glancing at the elf warily. Elrohir himself was looking extremely tired and worn-out, and just collapsed onto one of the couches, his feet landing in Elladan's lap.

"There's a few new bodies hidden in alleys, though." Elrohir muttered.

"We did find out that all but one of the government agents who kidnapped Kari, and tried to kidnap Elrohir, were not from LA." Ecthelion added.

"So we need to track down the one that was from LA." I said.

"Except his identity's been changed." Elrohir growled.

"Well, we'll track him down, one way or another. Can you at least get a picture of him?" I asked.

"Probably." Elrohir said with a sigh, heaving himself somewhat upright and snagging a slice of pizza. He took a bite, and then made a face. "Fruit does not belong on pizza." he said, and went about picking the pineapple off his pizza.

"Hey! If you don't like the pineapple, have a slice of the pepperoni!" I said indignantly.

"Too much effort." Elrohir said through a mouthful of pineapple-free pizza.

"And it's not too much effort to pick all the pineapple off your current slice?" I asked, arching an eyebrow. Elrohir grunted and tossed a piece of pineapple at me. "HEY!" I yelped, "This is a new-ish couch! Don't throw food at it! Or people sitting on it!" Elrohir just threw another piece of pineapple at me. I muttered, crossed my arms, and sulked. Glorfindel, of course, chose that moment to come over to the couch and sit on me. A brief wrestling match later, I was half-sitting on Glorfindel while he tried to catch pieces of pineapple that Elrohir threw our way in his mouth. Once Elrohir actually started aiming, they did fairly good. I only had to chuck one out of every six or eight pieces back at Elrohir.

"Y'know, if we keep on like this, we're going to need to get a broom and a mop." I observed as yet another piece of pineapple bounced off Elrohir to land on the floor - my aim hadn't improved much in the past several millennia.

"Wood floors." Elrohir said. "No mop." I snorted.

"Fine then. We'll get a vacuum and be done with it." I said grumpily.

"What's a vacuum?" Elladan asked with a puzzled look on his face, and I launched into an explanation. Which got only minorly sidetracked by Elrohir and I discussing the punniness of vacuums sucking. The explanation inevitably brought about more questions, and the evening soon turned into night as Elladan and I answering everyone else's questions about the world today. We had tried to explain some things to them before we came over - like cars and telephones - but the majority of things they really needed to see first before we could explain them adequately.

----To Be Continued...with Glorfindel in leather pants! (which is, of course, the only truely important part of the next chapter)----

-Authors Note-  
Well, for those of you that may not have noticed, the summary for the story has changed...went from advertising as a sequel, to actually summarizing what's happening in the story. Go me! Though I had to shorten the summary severely, due to and their stupid summary-length rules. -sniffle-

Anyways. I hope everyone enjoyed this chapter, and thank you to all of you who reviewed the last chapter, especially those two who didn't(Duke Storm)/can't(Ohana) sign in, and so I didn't reply to their reviews. -poke Duke Storm- Sign in next time, ye font of armament information.

And now...cyber-popcorn for everyone! Enjoy, and I'll see you all next chapter! Or when I reply to your reviews, if you submit a signed review. peer

Namarie,  
-Crimson Starlight


	7. Chapter 6: Plans

-The Games of the Gods, Book Two: Playing the Game-

-Disclaimer-  
Nothing belongs to me besides the characters of Rachel and Kari, and sometimes I wonder about them. The rest belongs to the brilliant genius that was JRR Tolkien...or reality.  
-Further Disclaimer-  
I have nothing against the FBI, nor am I implying anything about the type of people they hire by what I write about them in this FanFiction. If anything, I'm making fun of them cuz of just how darn awesome I think they are. -eyeshift- OK, maybe that last part isn't exactly correct...but only because the RCMP already occupy the Darn Awesome Government Policing/Investigative/Whatever Organization spot. (Horsies! Whacky uniforms! Whee!)

-6: Plans-

We stayed up remarkably late, considering we were basically talking in the dark, since we had no light bulbs. Everyone was still up rather early the next morning, though. Elrohir, Elladan and Ecthelion, being the three that were sleeping in the main room, were, not surprisingly, the first ones up, closely followed by Gil-galad and Glorfindel. Calenda and I followed at a later time, with me being the last to get up, just as the sun cleared the horizon - or would have cleared the horizon, had we been able to see it in the middle of LA. I made a face as I found everyone breakfasting on cold pizza.

"Oh Valar, how could you, Elrohir?" I said. "Cold pizza, yuck...that's disgusting." The rest of the group looked at each other in puzzlement, obviously having just followed Elrohir's lead and not seeing what was wrong with eating cold pizza.

"It's a matter of taste, Rachel, as you well know, and besides - I tried the stove. It's currently in one of it's 'off' stages." Elrohir replied sternly. I shuddered.

"Whatever. I'm going to go find a smoothie or bagel shop or something and buy some DECENT breakfast food." I said, heading for the door.

"Mm, better idea." Elrohir said, standing up. "Take Calenda, Elladan, and Ecthelion with you and make a morning of it. Buy a clock, some lightbulbs and lights, and other miscellany, and come back at lunch with more food."

"Excellent idea. Hmm, how do Elves handle Iced Caps?" I asked.

"Not as bad as pop, but it will still make you rather hyper." Elrohir admitted. I snapped my fingers.

"Damn." I said. "Ah well. Come on, you three. Let's go." Elladan and Ecthelion, having heard tales of shopping with me from Gil-galad, looked at each other warily. "Oh come on, I just want to get this stuff and get back here. No torture shopping this morning." I said with a roll of my eyes.

"Aww." Calenda said with a pout.

"Sorry Calenda, but I hate shopping as it is. I just figured you should learn Significant Other Torture Shopping." I said with a shrug. A few moments later, my group of four were out of the house and off to shop for electronics. We returned at lunch with a clock, cell phone for me, vacuum, lightbulbs, and a few floor lamps. That afternoon, Elrohir and I left everyone else at the apartment and went out computer shopping - because we knew we'd need one soon. Elrohir had tried contacting a few other people he knew that morning, but they seemed to either be out of the country, or avoiding him. He knew a computer hacker, however, and figured that, if all else failed, he could get him to hack into the government database.

Come evening, Elrohir and I returned with not only a computer, but a fridge, microwave, and supper in the form of KFC. We spent about an hour at the apartment after we had the fridge, microwave, and computer all set up, before Elrohir took Ecthelion and Gil-galad and went out on the town again, and I took Calenda and went out grocery shopping. Not surprisingly, Calenda and I returned before Elrohir and his group again, and I set about making some goodies out of the microwave cookbook I'd bought at the grocery store.

"We have a picture, and a location." Elrohir announced cheerfully when he, Ecthelion, and Gil-galad returned at around midnight. Ecthelion and Gil-galad immediately went over to the weapons racks and started removing all their weaponry.

"Ooo! Lemme see the picture, and where's the location?" I asked, holding out my hand as Elrohir walked over to the couch. Elrohir reached inside his coat and pulled out an 8 by 11 inch photo, obviously taken at a distance, that showed a non-descript FBI agent standing in front of a grocery store.

"Not much to go on." I said disappointedly. The picture wasn't even in colour.

"No, but we do now know that he, since his identity change, frequents a club about twenty minutes from here called the Steel Rainbow." Elrohir said.

"The Steel Rainbow? What the purple monkey kind of a name for a nightclub is that?" I asked, looking at Elrohir incredulously. He shrugged.

"LA's a big city - lots of nightclubs. They're probably running out of names." he said. "Anyways, I figured we could go buy some clubbing clothes tomorrow, then visit the club tomorrow night."

"I want to come on one of these trips." Glorfindel put in. I chuckled.

"Getting tired of watching the world through my eyes?" I asked with an affectionate smile.

"Just a bit." he said.

"He has cabin fever." Elrohir said dryly. I whipped my head around to look at Elrohir, my eyes wide. He grinned back at me.

"'And now though we're all here, we're not quite all there'?" I questioned, and Elrohir nodded. I laughed, and we both started singing the song 'Cabin Fever' from the Muppets version of 'Treasure Island'. By the end, we were on the floor, laughing our heads off.

"Oh Valar, we need to show them some sort of Muppets film." I said when I could finally speak.

"They won't get it. You need to know the original before the Muppets version becomes funny." Elrohir said with a chuckle, hoisting himself off the floor and onto one of the couches. I followed him.

"True. Alright, WE just need to see some sort of Muppets film, then." I said. We then returned our attention to everyone else, to find them looking at us funny.

"What!" Elrohir and I demanded at the same time, then burst out laughing again.

"Well, at least they're not depressed." Elladan said dryly, obviously referring more to his brother than to me.

"We're one step closer to finding Kari than we were before! Why would we be depressed?" I asked, then went over to the computer and started playing with it, seeing if the wireless internet we'd signed up for was working yet - the computer people had said it might take up to 24 hours (though they found it quite amusing that instead of asking them to come install it, we brought our computer to them). After we'd brought the computer back, we'd actually banned anyone but Elrohir or I from touching it, since we didn't even want to guess how badly they could screw it up without even knowing what they were doing.

"Aha!" I declared happily as I discovered the internet was working, then started searching to find a specific site.

"What are you doing?" Elrohir asked curiously after a moment.

"We need music." I declared. Everyone else in the room, remembering the brief foray into modern music in the truck, winced. No one made a move to stop me, however, and I soon pulled up an internet radio station. Great Big Sea's 'When I Am King' started blasting over the speakers.

"Aragorn's theme song!" Elrohir exclaimed with a grin. I giggled.

"Exactly what I called it." I said, then peered at Elrohir. "Did Kari tell you about that?"

"Maaaybe." Elrohir said, doing his best to look extremely suspicious. Thus followed an hour or so of goofing around with the radio. Elrohir and I did our level best to play a sample of every type of music we could find, including trance and karaoke, but eventually we all needed to turn in for the night. We could have managed with no sleep, but Elrohir and I knew clubs, and knew that we should all be in top form and alert tomorrow night.

The next morning was much a repeat of the last in terms of the order of who got up first - though thankfully, not in breakfast, which we actually had cereal and toast for now (the toast being made in the oven, which was now in it's 'on' stage) - and then it was strategy time. We needed to decide what to do with Mister Agent when we found him, besides get the information we needed. Elrohir was all for killing the man, of course, but the rest of us quickly vetoed that idea, since if our agent went missing, the government would probably realize we were onto them and take steps to ensure our capture, Kari's continued imprisonment, or both.

"But we can't really trust him not to tell anyone if we let him live." I said with a frown. "Between patriotism being what it is, and humankind's newest bad habit of selling their deepest secrets for the right price, our Agent is likely to tell SOMEONE that we grabbed him for one of those two reasons."

"How about if we leave him with somebody Elrohir knows and send a note to the government saying he's indisposed?" Glorfindel suggested. Elrohir frowned, and I grimaced.

"Doesn't really work that way anymore, Glorfindel." I said. "Unfortunately."

"I thought as much, but there should be a way to do a similar thing nowadays, yes?" Glorfindel asked, arching an eyebrow, and I glanced over at Elrohir. He gave me a thoughtful look.

"Emergency vacation." he finally said, and my eyes lit up.

"Where to and for what reason?" I said with a grin.

"Tibet, because he's had a spiritual crisis of faith." Elrohir smirked.

"What if he's not religious?" I inquired.

"Informant says that's how they found him - he refused to change churches." Elrohir said with a grin. "Though they wouldn't give me the name of the church - apparently they have something against us accosting the agent on holy ground - or rather, having the mob accost the agent on holy ground."

"Churches? As in Christian ones? Why would he go to Tibet to solve a crisis of faith if he's Christian?" I asked, arching an eyebrow.

"Well, they didn't specify Christian or non." Elrohir said with a shrug. "Maybe he's having a crisis of faith as in thinking of switching over to Buddhism?"

"I like. I assume you have a friend in Tibet you can hand him over to?" I asked.

"Oh, I know these monks, way out in the middle of nowhere -"

"Tibet is almost entirely composed of the middle of nowhere." I interrupted.

"The middle of the middle of nowhere, then." Elrohir said, making a face at me. "Anyways, they're really very curious about the outside world, wanting to understand how and why we don't think the same way they do. I think it's a requirement to join the monastery, wanting to know how the Western mind works, since every time I've gone there in the past 200 years they've tried to pick my brain apart. They kept me there for over ten years last time I dropped by, and gave me an open invitation to return any time."

"But will they hold someone against his will?" Glorfindel with a frown.

"Well, if we do things right, it won't necessarily be against his will." Elrohir said with a small smile. "And besides, he's out in the middle of nowhere - unless he's been traveling to a lot of odd places, he won't know the countryside around him. I find it hard to believe that any FBI agent would be dumb enough to try and find his way back to civilization without knowing the way. I hear they like to hire SMART people."

"Smart people who kidnap random elves." I pointed out.

"Yes, well, I only said I HEAR they like to hire smart people. The people I heard that from might not be as reliable as I thought." Elrohir said with a chuckle. "The question is, how are we going to get the agent over to Tibet?"

"I don't supposed you ever learned how to fly a plane?" I asked. Elrohir made a face.

"Sadly...yes, yes I did." he said. "Though every time I do it I wish I never had. The problem will be getting our hands on a plane. I think it would just be easier to book a commercial flight, to be honest, though I suppose I'll have to go with him to ensure he gets to the monastery."

"We should probably all go." I murmured. "In everyone else's cases, if only for the experience if nothing else."

"But that will mean more delays in Kari's rescue." Gil-galad felt obliged to point out.

"Yes, but I'd rather take the time and have the rescue go off without any nasty surprises than to get into Area 51 and find the entire US military waiting for us." Elrohir snapped, then immediately apologized.

"No need to apologize." Gil-galad said with a half-smile. "You're under a strain, we all know that."

"It's more the fact that I've spent too long among humans." Elrohir grumbled.

"Y'know, we've turned into quite the human-bashing group." I pondered.

"Well, they're so SHORT SIGHTED. It's aggravating." Elrohir complained, then he paused, and he and I looked at each other.

"I feel old." we said at the same time, then chuckled.

"OK, so we find this agent, get him to tell us his secrets, then willingly go to Tibet, and plan a rescue for Kari while going to and from Tibet with afore mentioned agent. Then, of course, we carry out said rescue plan and go home." I summarized.

"It sounds so ridiculously simple that way." Elladan said with a wry smile.

"Doesn't it?" Elrohir mused. "Ah well. Who's going to come with us to the club tomorrow in an attempt to track down our dear agent?" That conversation soon excluded everyone but Elrohir and I, as we began speaking in half-sentences, giving people funny glances, and collapsing into fits of giggles (yes, Elrohir giggled, too) as we imagined various members of our group in different 'clubbing' situations.

In the end, Elrohir and I decided on Glorfindel and Gil-galad, while Elladan, Calenda and Ecthelion would stay at the apartment. We wanted to be able to call them for back-up if necessary, but a look at a map showed that the Steel Rainbow was farther away than we'd thought - meaning that not only would the three of them not be able to get to us fast enough to count as 'back-up' but they'd probably get lost trying to find us, even with Calenda and Elladan's connections to Gil-galad and Elrohir.

At any rate, in the end, Elrohir decided that it was safe enough to leave the apartment alone for one morning, and we took everyone out shopping for clubbing clothes for those that were going out that night. This was partially to just get everyone out of the apartment, and partially as torture for Glorfindel and Gil-galad. Torture, because none of them really had a clue what 'clubbing' was, or what clothes were required for it - though they found out soon enough as Elrohir and I went straight for the clothes that everyone else had walked by, assuming it was either underwear or for streetwalkers.

And I didn't even make the trip pleasant for Glorfindel by letting him see what I picked out - I took only Calenda with me to find the clothes, then got Elrohir to come and give a guys opinion of them - his response being some dramatic speech in old English that basically amounted to, if he and I both hadn't been married, he'd have jumped me. My shopping for my outfit took less time than it took Elrohir to get clothes for Gil-galad and Glorfindel, of course, but after finding my clothes I also needed to go buy make-up, and so Calenda and I only met up with the guys again right before we were heading back to the apartment. Due to the seating arrangements in the truck, this meant that the only way Glorfindel could bug me about my outfit was mentally, but he gave up when I started reciting various geometric formulae in my head.

After that, we basically lazed around the apartment all afternoon - not hard once I rediscovered internet games, and the others curiosity kicked in and they started asking questions about the modern world. Eventually, around supper time, Elrohir and I gathered everyone together and explained to them what going 'clubbing' meant - something we'd purposefully neglected to mention until now. Glorfindel and Gil-galad seemed a little upset about it all for awhile, until I assured them that if they just told people they were taken and were only there accompanying a friend, they should mostly be left alone. I added the 'mostly' very quietly. Then, we had some supper, messed around for a bit more, and those going got ready.

Which resulted in a few minutes distraction for the couples, since Glorfindel was looking particularly yummy in some very tight black leather pants and a half-open green button-up shirt - and I'll readily admit to being the reason said shirt was half-open. And Gil-galad was equally good-looking in some silver pants and a sparkling blue t-shirt. Calenda, of course, gave me a good thwap when I oogled her husband, but it was only fair, since all the guys were now staring at me in utter shock. A little jean miniskirt and a purple lace shirt over a black bra will do wonders, especially when accompanied with a careful make-up job. By the time we left for the club, it was well after nine.

As soon as we came within sight of the club, Elrohir and I realized that there was one slightly useful piece of information about it that Elrohir's informant had left out. Between the literal steel rainbow over the door, the dress of the bouncer at the door, and the couple we saw walk in holding hands, we didn't really need the small add-on to the clubs sign to tell us that the Steel Rainbow was a gay bar and dance club. Elrohir and I glanced at each other as this fact registered with both of us, and I quirked an eyebrow, tilting my head slightly towards the back of the truck, silently asking if he wanted to tell Gil-galad and Glorfindel. Elrohir considered, then grinned evilly and shook his head.

"We can tell them after they get hit on a few times." he said under his breath as he parked the truck. I chuckled quietly, amused. Glorfindel and Gil-galad, meanwhile, continued sitting in the back of the truck, oblivious to the modern meaning of the word 'gay', simply assuming that the club was a particularly happy and carefree place. Well, they were oblivious right up until we stopped ten feet from the door, and I, feeling somewhat guilty, warned them to be ready for anything.

"Like your description of 'nightclubs' didn't already prepare us for that?" Gil-galad asked dryly.

"Yeah, well, our descriptions were only for the most 'normal' of nightclubs. This could be one of the...not so 'normal' ones." I said carefully, and when I glanced over at Elrohir, he gave me a slight pout before grinning to show he didn't mind me sort-of warning Gil-galad and Glorfindel. At any rate, having now thoroughly worried Gil-galad and Glorfindel, I continued on into the club, nodding cheerfully to the bouncer as I went in. Never hurts to be nice to bouncers.

Glorfindel and Gil-galad, of course, figured out that this was one of the 'not so normal' nightclubs right away - I could tell from the looks on their faces the moment they entered the club behind me that they knew something was up. Elrohir and I, of course, noticed their looks and cheerfully told them to go have fun, then disappeared into the crowds before they could demand an explanation. Elrohir and I ended up by the bar, where we both ordered drinks and sat chatting as we scanned the faces of everyone in the club - and, alright, watched with amusement as Gil-galad and Glorfindel tried to make their way through the club to us.

:Rachel, what in the Valar's name is going on: Glorfindel finally asked in annoyance after the third guy attempted to drag him off to the dance floor.

:It's a gay club, for people who prefer having relationships with their own gender.: I replied promptly. I saw Glorfindel start in surprise that I'd actually told him. :And since you're a nummy Elf Lord, every guy in this club is going to want to get his paws on you.:

:Wonderful.: Glorfindel growled.

:See if you can find Mr. FBI Agent down there.: I requested innocently, giving Glorfindel my most angelic smile when he shot a glare my way. Elrohir glanced sideways at me.

"Glorfindel finally asked what was going on?" he asked, and I nodded, grinning.

"I told him, then told to look at his admirers very closely." I replied.

"Hm. I suppose I should probably go tell Gil-galad now, too." Elrohir said with a sigh.

"Not necessarily." I said, looking over at Elrohir in surprise - only to find him already gone.

"So you come here often?" I heard from my other side, and I turned to find a sexily, and scantily, clad woman smiling at me.

:To do after we get out of here: kill Elrohir.: I sent to Glorfindel as I smiled back at the woman and started talking to her.

:Serves you right.: Glorfindel muttered back.

:Hey, I warned you...sort of.: I said defensively.

:VERY 'sort of'.: Glorfindel replied with a mental sticking out of his tongue, and then I had to pay attention to the lady hitting on me.

----To Be Continued...with a cheap flea and roach ranch!----

-Authors Note-  
Eeek, I'm sorry! I missed my Tuesday update, and then I had to work, and after work, I'm not too good at anything more than 'sit back and veg out'...which, sadly, updating this FanFiction doesn't count as. Yes, it does, amazingly, require thought to write and update this story. Gasp, shock, horror. -grin- Luckily, however, today I gave in and got myself a mocha on my way out of work, so now I'm superhyperactiveawakeandraringtogo! Um...yeah. Me and coffee mix interestingly.

Anyways. This was a fun chapter. It's one of the group of scenes that I thought up way before I even started writing the story - before I'd even decided to do a sequel to TGotG - that eventually made me decide to write a sequel.

And! It's minus freaking 50 degrees celsius out here with the wind chill! In Febuary! I hate my weather.

Now...hm. Thank you once again to all my reviewers - each and every one of your reviews is very much appreciated. And to my readers in general, remember, if you review and want a reply, be sure to sign in. Or leave your email and specifically ask for a reply - sorry, but I won't reply to non-signed reviews unless explicitly asked to.

And I'm off! See y'all in the next udate - which may be this Tuesday, or next Friday or Tuesday, depending on how inspired I get. And...various other factors.

Namarie!  
-Crimson Starlight 


	8. Chapter 7: Ameson

-The Games of the Gods, Book Two: Playing the Game- 

-Disclaimer-  
Nothing belongs to me besides the characters of Rachel and Kari, and sometimes I wonder about them. The rest belongs to the brilliant genius that was JRR Tolkien...or reality.

:A really MESSED UP version of reality...:

Hey, back in your box, sarcastic voice of unspecified gender!

-7: Ameson-

An hour after we entered the club, our quarry had yet to arrive, and the constant come-ons by guys were starting to have adverse affects on Gil-galad and Glorfindel's psychological stability. Finally, Elrohir grabbed them both and removed them from the general area of the dance floor, leading them to where I was sitting, now alone, at the bar.

"Time for a little drink." Elrohir said, and then promptly ordered three of the strongest alcoholic beverage the bar served - a drink unique to the club, named the Insider Acid.

"A 'little' drink?" I asked, arching an eyebrow.

"Well, it is rather weak compared to mirovur." Elrohir said, handing Glorfindel and Gil-galad their drinks - which, to the amazement of the barman, they downed in one gulp.

"Everything's weak compared to a drink that's almost pure alcohol and has been sitting around for several centuries." I observed.

"True." Elrohir admitted. "Anyways. Doesn't look like we're going to get a bite. Should we go and come back tomorrow?"

"No." Gil-galad answered for me, and I turned to find him intently watching someone near the entrance to the club. All of us immediately - and oh so intelligently - looked in the same direction. When I realized what we were doing, I immediately turned back the bar, and told Glorfindel to do the same.

"Looks like him." I said cheerfully.

"Yep." Glorfindel said, and then chuckled slightly. Gil-galad looked at us in confusion.

"It's a little suspicious to have us all turning people down all evening, then suddenly focus on one guy that walks in, don't you think?" I said, arching an eyebrow, still smiling, acting as if I was explaining what was funny to Gil-galad.

"Oh. Right." he muttered. "I'm not used to this...at least with Sauron it was simple. You could tell his minions at a glance."

"That's OK. Now, we need to get you and Glorfindel drunk - at least by human standards. Or at least a little tipsy." I said, and ordered two more Insider Acids. I gave Elrohir a nudge, and he took my meaning, having noticed that Gil-galad and Glorfindel had been getting more attention than him on the dance floor, and we started a slightly-louder-than-normal conversation about how Glorfindel and Gil-galad were hopeless and they'd never find boyfriends the way they were going. We then proceeded to force them to drink two more Insider Acids - which should have, by human standards, had them rip-roaring drunk, but had only affected their Elven constitutions a little. After that, we shoved them out onto the dance floor, and sat back to watch.

It didn't take long for things to happen. The word of these two delicious, single men - after we'd told Gil-galad and Glorfindel what type of club it was, we told them to claim to be alone and single - had apparently spread throughout the club, and within five or ten minutes of them returning to the dance floor, the Agent had approached Glorfindel.

"Likes blondes, apparently." Elrohir commented.

"He's probably going for the long hair, actually." I said. "He looks like he likes to be the man in a relationship."

"Whatever the reason, it's good. At least now you can coach Glory on what to say." Elrohir replied.

"True." I said with a chuckle, just as a frantic mental call from Glorfindel about how to dance with a guy came my way. Gil-galad soon drifted back to the bar with us - after being snagged for a few dances himself - and together we watched as Glorfindel hit it off with the agent. Glorfindel relayed information he gleaned to me, and so we discovered that the agent's current name was Kenny McCarry, and his cover story was that he worked at an accounting firm. Of course, I was required to give Glorfindel similar information to give to Agent McCarry - so Glorfindel ended up being Finn Rogers, who was in the publishing business, something McCarry wasn't likely to know much about, while I knew bits and pieces.

"How're we going to get from point A, being now, to point B, being getting our agent to tell us everything he knows about Kari, anyways?" I asked Elrohir quietly.

"Get him to leave the club with Glory, and then ambush him." Elrohir replied, as if it was the most obvious thing in the world.

"And how are we going to do that?" I asked.

"How much alcohol have you had?" Elrohir asked me.

"A fair bit." I replied, eyeing him warily.

"Enough to make you drunk by human standards?" he asked, tilting his head to one side, and I nodded.

"Good, so have I. Let's dance." he said, grabbing me and heading towards the dance floor. Gil-galad stared after us in surprise. He wasn't half as surprised as me, however - especially when Elrohir started grinding with me. I grinned once I figured out what Elrohir was doing, however, and replied in kind. When nothing had happened after a couple of minutes, Elrohir went one step further and started putting his hands where they had no place going, especially in public. Right when he was getting desperate enough to risk Glorfindel's wrath by trying to kiss me - I was already exerting all my mental pressure to keep Glory from attacking Elrohir, repeating over and over again that it was for the greater good and I'd make it up to him later - one of the club's bouncers tapped Elrohir on the shoulder and politely suggested that he stop, or at least move it to a less public part of the club.

Elrohir, of course, immediately replied with a rude gesture, and when the bouncer insisted, Elrohir started ranting about discrimination. The bouncer only truly got annoyed when Elrohir started using the word 'fag', however, and less than a minute after Elrohir first used that word, he found himself on his ass outside of the club. I followed him, pretending to be in a snit, and flashed the entire club both middle fingers before I exited the door. Inside, I could hear the club owner getting on the speakers - the club being small enough that the DJ had stopped the music at the commotion - and apologizing to everyone before the music started up again.

:And now, you will suggest that this place isn't all that entertaining anymore and ask Kenneth McCarry if he would like to go for a walk, because you know this nice little coffee shop just around the corner.: I told Glorfindel, just as Gil-galad, confused, exited the club.

:But...I don't: Glorfindel protested.

:And? We need to get him out of the club.: I said, then turned to Elrohir. "Lead the way. Glorfindel's suggesting they leave."

"Right, this way." Elrohir said, and jogged off to the corner. Gil-galad and I followed, Gil-galad still confused and without a clue as to what was going on. He got the idea, however, when Elrohir and I hid ourselves in the shadows of the street, and hid himself as well.

:Is this coffee shop left or right: Glorfindel asked a moment later.

:Right.: I replied, and about a minute later, Glorfindel appeared around the corner, walking beside the FBI agent. We waited until they were past us, and then Elrohir and Gil-galad emerged and, in a few quick moves, had Mr. McCarry on the ground, unconscious. Glorfindel immediately shuddered and edged away from the unconscious man, eyeing him warily.

"Grab his wallet. If it doesn't have his FBI ID in it, we'll need to go ransack his place." I said, and Elrohir complied.

"Nope, it's got it." he said, holding up the FBI ID card. "Real name is Corey Ameson."

"Right. I'll go get the truck." I said, and dashed off. A short while later, I pulled the truck up alongside, and we hoisted Mr. Ameson into the back and drove off. Elrohir, meanwhile, searched Ameson for bugs or trackers, and when he didn't find one, suggested that we make for a hotel.

"What type?" I asked innocently from the drivers seat, making sure my innocent expression was seen by those riding in the back with our dear, unconscious secret agent, and Elrohir gave me a weary look.

"The cheap, no-questions-asked, kind." he said.

"Right! Cheap flea and roach ranch coming up." I declared, and in the rearview mirror, I saw Elrohir shudder. I smirked, and then set about finding a cheap hotel. About half an hour later, when those in the back were starting to get uneasy about Agent Ameson waking up, I finally found one, and fifteen minutes - and no questions - later, we had Agent Ameson tied to the only chair in the hotel room.

"Glorfindel, I believe you should have the honors." Elrohir said, coming out of the bathroom with a pitcher of water, handing it to Glorfindel, who grinned before gleefully splashing the Agent. Two pitchers later, Agent Ameson groaned and cracked open his eyes.

"Welcome back to the land of the conscious, Special Agent Corey Ameson." I quipped, causing his eyes to fly open, a panicked expression crossing his face. Really, though, what did he expect, carrying his FBI ID around in his wallet? He scanned the room quickly - all the while wriggling in an attempt to determine which of his hidden weapons we'd left him with. He stopped, however, a flicker of recognition crossing his face as he spotted Elrohir.

"What's going on? Who are you people?" he demanded.

"To be extremely cliché, we are going to be your worst nightmares if you don't co-operate with us." Elrohir said, his voice dangerously low. Ameson eyed him, and I could almost see him closing up.

"Agent Ameson, I suggest you take his words to heart." I hissed, leaning forward. "Not only have you kidnapped his wife, but he is much older and much more traveled than he seems. He knows torture techniques that even the worst butchers you can think of have never even thought of. And he knows how to heal you up afterwards so he can start all over again." Ameson snarled at me, and Elrohir reached behind the agent and did...something. I don't know what he did, and I'm not sure I ever want to, as when Elrohir withdrew after only a few seconds, the Agent's face was pale, his expression one of pain. His whimper was barely audible, and it took him almost five minutes to recover enough to be able to focus on anything.

I grimaced, thinking of the irony even as Glorfindel pointed it out to me - here we were using torture when we were trying to rescue Kari to prevent HER from being tortured, should anyone in the FBI have, sadly, fallen that low. I could almost justify it by convincing myself that of COURSE someone had fallen that low, but try as I might, it didn't really work - the convincing or the justification.

"Now, I need you to tell me everything you know about the capture and imprisonment of Kari Perethil..." Elrohir said, pulling me out of my thoughts, and his smile was more evil than Sauron could ever have achieved when he had a mortal form.

"I don't know much!" Ameson insisted, whimpering slightly.

"Tell us what you do know, then." I asked.

"Ah - it was some clerk at headquarters who discovered it. They were bored and going through files, and spotted Kari Perethil's forged birth certificate." Ameson said shakily. "We did a full investigation, and discovered not only that all her documents from her younger years were false, but that her 'husband'," here he nodded to Elrohir, who growled at the obvious quotes around the word 'husband', "Also had false documents."

"If you want to remain pain free, I would suggest not implying that Kari and Elrohir aren't actually married." I said dryly. "They are, in fact, soul mates who have been married longer than you could imagine."

"Oh, I don't know about that." Ameson muttered, and when Elrohir made a move towards him, he hastily qualified his remark. "I mean about the time!" Ameson relaxed slightly as Elrohir moved away. "We discovered documents recording Kari and Elroy Perethil's presence in the civilized world going back over three hundred years." I glanced at Elrohir, but chose not to comment on his choice of name as he glared darkly at the Agent.

"Damn, knew I should've worked harder to convince Kari to let me burn down a few more record buildings." he muttered. Ameson frowned, but wisely didn't comment.

"OK, so that's how you found out about them." I said. "How did that turn into kidnapping?"

"Well, it started with simple surveillance." Ameson said. "We held some stake-outs, took some pictures of their associates using telephoto lenses - it was all coming up to nothing until last Christmas, when we hit the jackpot." Elrohir let out a hissing breath, and Ameson smiled somewhat ironically at the Elf. "You know what it was."

"The snowball fight." Elrohir growled. "We went prancing about on top of the freshly fallen snow that we should have fallen right through." Ameson nodded.

"I was the one that spotted it, which was why I was kept on the case when the government decided that the situation had become top secret and classified." the Agent said. "We stepped up surveillance, and discovered the pointed ears and tendency to glow at night. Not to mention the extra speed and strength that they demonstrated when we staged a robbery."

"I always thought there was something fishy about that." Elrohir said with a frown. "But I thought it might've been someone else trying to see if we'd slacked off any." Ameson shrugged.

"After we gave our final report to our superiors, they sent out a special team ordered to bring you both in for questioning and medical examination." the Agent said. "I was the only one, once again, allowed in on the operation, and that was only so I could ID the targets."

"One of those 'targets' was my wife of over five thousand years, who was going, along with me, to shortly be long gone from your world." Elrohir snarled. Ameson just gave Elrohir an ironic look.

"Medical examination?" I interrupted, and Ameson nodded.

"They wanted to determine whether or not we were dealing with humans, and if we were, how they came to be so changed." the Agent said. I glanced worriedly at Elrohir.

"I don't suppose you ever..." I trailed off as he nodded, wearily.

"We don't register as human according to our DNA." he said flatly.

"Damn." I cursed, then turned to Ameson. "So what was the plan if Kari turned out to not be human?" Ameson shrugged, now looking slightly sick.

"Most of us didn't want to think about that, and therefore didn't ask." Ameson said.

"I take it you were one of the ones that didn't want to think about it." I observed. Ameson grimaced and nodded. "Well, you can relax, we're not for-runners of an alien invasion or anything. We're not even aliens. We were here before you." Ameson gave me a 'yeah, right' look, and I just shrugged. Let him believe what he wanted.

"Where is Kari being held now?" Elrohir asked. Ameson shrugged.

"I don't buy that. Why would your identity be changed if you didn't know something of value?" I said, tilting my head to one side. "Like, say, where Kari is being kept."

"I don't know." Ameson stubbornly insisted. Apparently he'd reached the limit of what he was willing to tell without further persuasion. Elrohir started forward, a gleam in his eye, but Glorfindel beat the younger elf to it, a truly terrifying expression on his face that he could have only learned from a Balrog, while a quick mental brush revealing that he was doing this so Elrohir wouldn't have it on his conscience later. Unlike Elrohir, however, Glorfindel didn't even touch the Agent - he just leaned close to Ameson's ear and spoke very quietly for almost a minute, as Ameson kept getting paler and paler and paler.

:I think I, sadly, finally found a use for Orc and Nazgul attacks.: Glorfindel said with a sigh as he pulled away.

"Area 51." Ameson mumbled quietly once Glorfindel had moved a safe distance away. The Agent was, at this point, clearly terrified, though even as I watched, I could see him slowly getting a grip on his emotions.

"So, Agent Ameson, where is the fabled 'Area 51'?" Elrohir asked before Ameson could fully recover, and what control Ameson had instantly disappeared again.

"Uh...I have no idea." he squeaked out, eyeing Glorfindel warily. "Only the head of the FBI and the top agent know where it is!"

"What about the people who work there?" I asked.

"When working there, they live on the base. And when they go there, they disappear at night in a helicopter and aren't seen again until their tenure at the Area is up - and while they're sworn to secrecy about everything concerning the Area, some discrete questioning has revealed that no matter what, it always takes the same amount of time to get there." Ameson said with a shrug. Elrohir and I both watched him intently as he spoke, looking for any sign that he was lying. In the end, our conclusion was the same as the one Glorfindel gave me when Elrohir and I both nodded in satisfaction - Ameson was telling the truth insofar as we could tell.

"And this is a long shot, but anything else you think we might need to know?" I asked dryly.

"Uh, if I don't contact the office tomorrow they'll come looking for me." Ameson, surprisingly, volunteered. I let my surprise show on my face.

"Wow." I commented, then turned to Elrohir. He looked back for a moment, then sighed and rolled his eyes.

"OK, so MAYBE the FBI MIGHT hire SOME smart people." he admitted, and I grinned before turning back to Ameson, who was looking confused.

"So now there's the question of what to do with Agent Ameson during the next day and how to keep the FBI from coming suspicious." Glorfindel mused. I glanced at him, confused, since we'd already planned this out, and then it dawned on me - this was part of making Ameson go willingly to Elrohir's friends in Tibet.

"Well, personally, I'd love to give him a nasty gash on his arm and drop him in shark infested waters with a pail of hardened cement attached to his feet. I've always wondered what the chances in that situation are of getting eaten before you drown." Elrohir said, a nasty gleam in his eyes. Gil-galad whacked the - relatively - young elf over the head, beating the rest of us to it.

"It is past time you went to Valinor to recover from your stay among mortals. You have become far too violent." the High King said with a frown, and Elrohir grimaced as he rubbed the back of his head.

"And who just hit me upside the head?" he asked, then ducked again, quickly, as Gil-galad took another swing at him.

"Not in front of the Agent, boys." Glorfindel said dryly, and Elrohir and Gil-galad looked over at him in mock innocence.

"We're not going to drop him in shark-infested waters with cement shoes on, anyways." I said sternly, seeing Ameson getting worried that no one had refuted Elrohir's suggestion.

"It's not like we could kill him, anyways, since the FBI will come looking for him." Glorfindel pointed out. "He's said as much himself."

"And with the fuss we made they'll have little to no trouble finding us - or at least our descriptions." Elrohir concluded with a sigh.

"If you let me go, I won't tell anyone. I swear!" Agent Ameson spoke up suddenly, speaking quickly, and then recoiling in fear as all of us turned our attention to him.

"There is absolutely nothing you can swear on that would make us believe you." I said dryly.

"You humans these days will sell your greatest secrets if the price is right." Elrohir said mildly.

"Not even my life?" Ameson squeaked out, clearly terrified.

"No, not even your life." Elrohir replied with a vicious grin.

"But, if you're willing to do that...how willing would you be to phone in an emergency vacation to the office?" I inquired curiously.

"Er - very willing." Ameson said, a note of hope creeping into his voice as he looked at me.

"Excellent." I said, then turned to Elrohir. "How about we stick him in a crate and mail him to Tibet?" I suggested innocently. "Didn't you mention you knew some monks there?"

"Indeed I do. What a wonderful idea, Rachel." Elrohir said with a smirk. "And as long as he's as smart as you seem to think and doesn't try to escape, he should survive and eventually be able to return to America again." Elrohir grinned maliciously. I shook my head.

"You have spent FAR too long in this world." I stated.

"Indeed I have." Elrohir said solemnly. "So has Kari. That is why we were trying to go to Valinor. If not for Agent Ameson's little friends, we would have made it, too."

"I know, I know." I said with a sigh, then turned to Ameson and gave him a thoughtful look. He looked somewhat less terrified than before, though he was clearly still frightened and wary.

"You're - er - not actually going to stick me in a CRATE, are you?" he asked tentatively when he saw me looking at him. All of us looked at him blankly for a moment, and then, suddenly, we all collapsed into various forms of laughter.

"No, Agent Ameson," I said between giggles, "We aren't going to put you in an actual crate."

"Though one can survive such a journey in comfort if they have to." Elrohir said with a snicker. "I know, Kari did it once."

"She did? Why?" I asked curiously.

"Well, we'd been doing things on opposite sides of the world for a couple decades, and Kari decided to send me a birthday present. Of herself." Elrohir explained calmly, making it sound like someone mailing themselves around the word in a crate as a birthday present for their significant other was completely logical.

"I suppose if you live long enough in the human world you do eventually do EVERYTHING." I mused, then shook my head. "Anyways. Getting Ameson from here to Tibet." Elrohir nodded and turned solemnly to Ameson.

"We're going to leave you here tonight - with Gil-Galad and Glorfindel guarding you - and then tomorrow morning, we're all going on a little trip to Tibet." Elrohir explained carefully. "Before we go, you're going to phone in an emergency vacation due to a spiritual crisis. You're not going to stop by your apartment, and you're not going to be allowed to say anything other than what we tell you to. Is this understood?" Ameson nodded rapidly.

"I am entirely in favour of anything that results in me keeping my life, even if that life is kept in Tibet." he said sincerely.

"See, smart." I told Elrohir reprovingly.

"We'll see. Words are cheap - if we get him to the monastery in Tibet WITHOUT him trying to escape or his FBI buddies showing up, then I'll admit to him being smarter than he looks." Elrohir said with a grin. "Now, we'd best be getting back to the apartment. Plans to make and all that."

"Actually, Elrohir, would it be too much to have Elladan come and guard with Gil-galad?" Glorfindel asked blandly. For a moment, he and Elrohir locked gazes, and something that I didn't catch passed between them. I looked at Glorfindel curiously, but his mind was surprisingly closed off from mine. I started worrying that maybe I should've explained more clearly to him what he was walking into in the club, even as Elrohir nodded, accepting Glorfindel's suggestion.

"Gil-galad, think you can keep Ameson in one piece - excuse me, one place - until Elladan gets here?" Elrohir asked the High King, who smirked at the Agent - causing Ameson to grimace and edge away from him. Well, as much as he could considering he was tied to a chair, and any hint of him trying to move the actual chair would likely result in about eight different bladed weapons being pressed to his throat or pointed at his heart.

"I think I can manage. After all, I have lots of wonderful stories that I haven't told anyone yet. Like what it feels like to have Sauron's sword jabbed into your gut, up into your ribcage, and then twisted, before being flung hundreds of feet to land in a bloody mess that, thankfully, takes only a few moments longer to die." Gil-galad grinned.

"Well there's not many listeners for a tale like that in Valinor." Glorfindel said dryly, then turned back to Elrohir and I. "Shall we go?"

"Let's." Elrohir said, and out we went. We jumped in the truck and headed back to the apartment, where we found Elladan already waiting outside for us. Apparently Elrohir had used whatever mental connection the twins had to tell Elladan that he was needed. So, since Elrohir needed to drive Elladan to the hotel where Gil-galad was now staying, it was only Glorfindel and I who entered the apartment. Calenda and Ecthelion started asking questions the instant we entered, of course - but Glorfindel didn't even slow down for them.

"Ask Gil-galad." was all he said, with a pointed look at Calenda, as he hauled me into our room and closed - almost slammed - the door. Now thoroughly worried, I was opening my mouth to start apologizing to Glorfindel, when I abruptly found it otherwise occupied. Very confused, I simply responded to Glorfindel's kiss, and when he pulled away, I let my confusion show on my face, even as my insides started going melty from the look he was giving me. I vaguely wondered if Glorfindel was taking me up on my offer of 'making it up to him' a little earlier than I'd planned (I figured before we left I'd borrow Elrohir's credit card again and rent the most expensive room in the most expensive hotel in town and spend the night there with Glorfindel) but when Glorfindel explained, I realized that while this COULD be taken as making it up to Glorfindel, it really wasn't, and so I could still go ahead with my plans (which I was immensely happy about...after that day in the Lothlorien hot springs with Glorfindel oh-so-long-ago, I REALLY wanted to get Glorfindel into a hot tub).

"In the course of a few hours, I have had my sexuality questioned by no less than three dozen men, been unable to correct a single one of them due to the need of a greater good, even had to lead one of them on, and furthermore, I have had to watch another Elf dance with my wife in a way only I should be allowed to do." Glorfindel growled, then kissed me again. :I'm feeling the need to assert both my sexuality and my claim.: he continued mentally.

:Fine by...uh...: I trailed off as Glorfindel started doing something interesting with his tongue. :What was I saying:

:Absolutely nothing.: Glorfindel informed me with a mental smirk as he picked me up and carried me to the bed.

After that, coherent thought, at least on my end, pretty much ended.

----To Be Continued...with Aviophobia!----

-Authors Note-  
This chapter is cheerily dedicated to the original romantic pairing of TGotG, before Glorfindel butted his way in - that pairing being Rachel and Elladan (OK, so Elladan wasn't available for this chapter, but still, Elrohir is the next best thing). Yes, this was supposed to be a TwinFic, but Elladan just didn't measure up in the end, so I went with Glorfindel instead. You can see evidence of it right up to the end of Chapter 28 in Book One, when Rachel leaves the Hall of Fire without Elladan.

In other news, sorry for the delay, but I had some serious troubles with this chapter. For one thing, it was just hard to write, and get right. It wasn't until I got a brain spurt at 11pm last night that I managed to get it touched up and finished off to my satisfaction. Also, I'm in the middle of a week and a half almost straight of work. The only day I've had off since the 21st was yesterday. On the plus side, however, I now have my own computer, in my room, so when I get brain spurts at eleven at night, I can actually do something about them now, since I can't use the main computer in the house after 10pm.

Yep...and that's it for me for today, I think. Oh, except for a note that my next update might be awhile in coming, too. I'll try to get it up next Tuesday, but, well, I may get distracted. -smirk-

So, until my next update, May It Not Be Long In Coming, thank you to all my readers, and special cyber cookies on top of thank yous to all my reviewers, and I'll see you soon!

Namarie,  
-Crimson Starlight


	9. Chapter 8: Transport

NO NEW CHAPTER. SEE NEW AUTHOR'S NOTE AT BOTTOM. 

-The Games of the Gods, Book Two: Playing the Game-

-Disclaimer:-

Nothing belongs to me besides the characters of Rachel and Kari, and sometimes I wonder about them. The rest belongs to the brilliant genius that was JRR Tolkien...or reality.

-8: Transport -

The next morning, it was a very smug Glorfindel and a very happy, dazed me who emerged from our room for breakfast. Calenda either didn't notice or ignored our looks, while Ecthelion and Elrohir exchanged smirks. I managed to pull myself down to earth enough to start discussing plans in more detail with Elrohir, however, and it was soon determined that Elrohir and Glorfindel were going to spend the morning out hiring some 'protection' for our apartment while we went to Tibet, while Ecthelion and I went to check up on Ameson and his two guards, and book plane tickets.

"Oh, he's doing fine." Calenda informed us smugly when I announced where Ecthelion and I were going. "Though Gil can't quite remember when he last saw a human that particular shade of white." I rolled my eyes.

"OK, make that, Jack and I are going to go RESCUE Ameson from his guards." I said wryly.

"Well, at least he won't give us any trouble phoning in his emergency vacation." Ecthelion said with a chuckle, only stumbling slightly over the modern words. It was a good thing Elves had, as a general rule, very good mental capabilities, allowing them to adapt more quickly than a human would. "Speaking of which, do you know what you want him to say?"

"Um..." I blinked, completely clueless. Elrohir, just getting ready to leave, sighed and pointed to the counter, where a pad of paper with writing on it rested.

"I wrote it last night while you and Glorfindel were sequestered in your room." he said with a grin.

"Yay! Wonderful purple twin!" I said with a smile, practically bouncing over to the counter. I quickly read over the speech Elrohir had written. "Too long and stilted." I declared, then grabbed the nearby pen and started crossing things out and re-writing sections. Elrohir gave an exasperated sigh, then shook his head and said his goodbyes. Glorfindel didn't go so calmly, of course, having to come over to me, pluck the pen out of my fingers, turn me around, and give me a kiss that left me struggling to remember why he just gave me a pen, and most especially, where on earth he thought he was going. A mental nudge from Glorfindel as he ducked out the door, fortunately, restarted my brain, and with an annoyed 'harrumph', I went back to editing Elrohir's 'speech'.

Finally, after about half an hour of re-writing, I deemed the resulting message acceptable, then said goodbye to Calenda, instructing her not to open the door to anyone but one of us - to which she rolled her eyes and replied 'Yes, Mother' in a very sarcastic sort of way. Some days, being a mom just plain sucked. Anyways. Ecthelion and I headed off, arriving at the hotel without incident (well, as long as you don't count Ecthelion's horror over the chihuahua we saw, and my almost accident when, upon spying said chihuahua, I declared 'yo quiero Taco Bell' and collapsed into an unexpected giggle-fit). At the hotel, we found that Ameson was indeed an unnaturally pale shade of white for a human. I gave Elladan and Gil-galad reproving looks.

"And just WHAT have you been telling him, hmm?" I demanded.

"Oh, nothing much." Gil-galad said innocently - too innocently.

"Orcs." Ameson managed to squeak out, his eyes wide, as he looked at me.

"Ahhhh." I said with a sage nod. "Only believe half of what they said. They both have a mad on for the creatures. Now! I have your little speech that your going to tell the people at FBI headquarters." I held the piece of paper out to him, and he read it over once, then frowned.

"Um, you might want to change that last line." he suggested, then immediately flinched as all the males in the room turned glares on him. I just arched an eyebrow.

"Why?" I asked.

"Well, that particular phrasing could sort of kind of bring the entire FBI down on you looking for me?" Ameson said, an interesting combination of fear and hope displayed on his face.

"What, is it code from 'I'm in trouble, come find me' or something?" I asked in surprise, and he nodded vigorously. I stared at him for a moment, then burst out laughing. Eventually, given all the weird looks I was getting, I calmed down and declared, "Only Elrohir and I could stumble across such a phrase by accident." Ameson shrugged and gave a tentative smile, which quickly disapeared into abject terror as Gil-galad have him a deadly glare. "Enough, Gilly. We don't need him so terrified he can't speak, or they hear his emotions across the line. Now, Ameson, what's the number?" Ameson blinked and looked up at me in surprise.

"You...want me to give you the number?" he asked incredulously.

"Yes, is there a problem with that?" I asked patiently.

"Well, no, but considering how you were going on about not being able to trust me last night, I'm surprised you'd trust me to not give you the phone number for the elite special forces division or something." he said truthfully, then hurried to add, "Not that I would!"

"Certain things require a certain amount of trust." I said with a shrug. "Besides, it seems to me that you know now that it's in your best interests to co-operate."

"That I do." Ameson said, glancing at Gil-galad and Elladan, then rattled off a phone number. I had him repeat it, slower this time, as I wrote it down. I dialed the number using the hotel room's phone, then held it up to Ameson's ear. To my surprise, he didn't start right in on the speech, but there was nothing I could do without causing suspicion as he started flirting with whoever was on the other end. Then, after a couple of minutes, he said his little speech, made a few excuses, and said goodbye. When I hung up the phone, everyone in the room silently turned to look at Ameson, who shrunk in his chair.

"Monique has been my friend for years, and our flirting is a running joke between us. She would've been suspicious if I hadn't flirted with her for awhile!" Ameson finally snapped defensively.

"You could've warned us." I said angrily. "I TOLD you to stick to the speech we prepared!"

"Well, I didn't know she'd be on the phones today until I heard her voice." Ameson said defensively. "And if you knew there was a possibility that I'd have to ad-lib, would you have phoned at all, or just set off for Tibet without getting me to phone in?" I sighed.

"Should've let Elrohir kill him." Elladan said, his manner making it clear that he'd be happy to kill the agent on his brother's behalf.

"No, what damage is done, is done." I said. "Let's just get him into the truck and find another hotel to hold him at." So we spent about two hours finding a different hotel to stay at - as far away from the first one as we could get and still be within easy traveling distance of our apartment - and then I left Elladan and Ecthelion to guard Ameson as I took Gil-galad back to the apartment. We had a little argument with Calenda about letting us in - she, of course, decided to be smart and question my identity. Gil-galad eventually sent her some sort of mental message that made her open the door. The type of message was revealed when, upon entering, Calenda and Gil-galad disappeared into their room much the same way as Glorfindel and I had disappeared the other night, leaving me to close the door and sit down at the computer to begin booking plane tickets.

Elrohir and Glorfindel arrived back about an hour after I finished booking the tickets, and then we dragged Calenda and Gil-galad out of their room to begin packing all personal items up again. Elrohir and I included the computer tower in our packing, just in case, and then we threw everything into the truck, even as two thug-ish looking men showed up and asked to speak with Elrohir. A few quiet directions and the exchanging of keys later, the two thugs disappeared into the apartment, and we all piled into the truck.

"What makes you think they won't steal everything and run?" I asked Elrohir as we headed for the hotel with Ameson, Elladan and Ecthelion.

"I'm paying them almost double of what everything in that apartment is worth. And they only got $1000 of it, each, ahead of time." Elrohir said.

"Ah, money. The way to a man's loyalty nowadays. Mostly." I said sagely.

"Not really." Elrohir said. "Having 'A Cause' is more of an incentive for loyalty than money these days, as per always."

"Mmm...no, I think if anything, they're tied." I pondered.

"Can we go already?" Calenda asked impatiently. Elrohir and I, having snagged the front seats again, looked back at Calenda in surprise, then at each other.

"'Are we there yet?'" We said in unison, and as Calenda sat back to sulk, we sniggered and Elrohir started up the truck. After I corrected Elrohir on exactly which hotel we were going to, we went off, and several hours later, our little group arrived at the airport.

"I just thought of something." I said with a frown as Elrohir parked. "We don't have passports." Wordlessly, Elrohir pulled a stack of passports out of his pocket and began handing them out to various people. "Wow, you were busy this morning." I mused.

"He's had people working on them since our first night here." Ecthelion revealed as he took his, and I glanced at Elrohir in surprise. He shrugged.

"I had a feeling we would have to leave the country." he said with a secretive smile. When I arched an eyebrow, he looked pointedly at Ameson, who was being 'escorted' by Gil-galad, Glorfindel, and Ecthelion. I shrugged, and we went off into the airport. I'd get the reasons for his 'feeling' out of him later.

Even with Elrohir's passports, I was BEYOND amazed by the time we managed to get into the air. The ease with which we'd gone through security had been...simply astonishing. I hadn't gotten through security that easily since I was in my early teens - before September 11th, in other words.

"Well, Elladan and I may have sort of picked up a few things from Grandmother." Elrohir said innocently when I commented on it.

"You didn't!" I exclaimed, then immediately quieted and shrunk down in my seat as I got a few reproving stares from other passengers. When they had all turned their attention elsewhere, I turned back to Elrohir and hissed, "Tell me you and Elladan didn't mind-whammy airport security!"

"It was hardly a mind-whammy!" Elrohir sniffed. "Neither of us have anywhere near Grandmother's skill at telepathy. We just...soothed their nerves a bit while we were around. And we'll both have headaches tomorrow as thanks for our trouble, especially if we continue doing it all the way to Tibet, as I plan to." I frowned.

"So you went to all the trouble to get passports, and you're not even trusting them now?" I inquired.

"It's not so much that I don't trust them, as that I'd rather be on the safe side, considering what's at stake." Elrohir said, with a meaningful look, and I realized he was right - despite any moral objections I might have to impairing airport security's ability to do their job, Kari was the most important thing here. So I nodded and turned my attention to Glorfindel, who was staring fixedly at the seat in front of him, hands gripped on the chair arms so tightly his knuckles were white.

"Enjoying yourself, Glorindel?" I asked pleasantly.

"I hate flying." he ground out, and I arched an eyebrow.

"How can you hate it already? We just started the flight, and this is your first time." I pointed out.

"Oh, I've been 'flying' through the air before. It wasn't pleasant then, and this is bringing back those unpleasant memories." Glorfindel stated, his voice very carefully kept even.

"Ah. Oh. Right." I murmured, remembering how Glorfindel had REALLY died - most people thought it was the Balrog that had killed him, but if one managed to get Glorfindel to talk about it, they'd find out that he'd actually died because the Balrog had pulled him off balance and sent him tumbling down the mountainside - something guaranteed to kill even the best of warriors. "Hmm." I said thoughtfully, looking at Glorfindel, and then turned to Elrohir and informed him that he was going to help me distract Glorfindel for the rest of the trip.

"What? Why?" Elrohir asked, startled.

"Because flying doesn't agree with him. Now, distraction!" I ordered. Elrohir just looked at me like a deer caught in headlights for a moment more, and then leaned around me and started talking to Glorfindel about something or another as I began fiddling with my seat so I could poke my head back to check on the other members of our party - Elladan and Ecthelion were sitting on either side of Ameson behind us, and then Gil-galad and Calenda behind them (Various seat changes with other passengers had resulted in us having our nice block of seats together - it was actually surprising how accommodating other people were when you asked very nicely if they'd mind switching seats so you could sit with your husband/daughter/son-in-law/other relation).

In the end, I ended up convincing everyone, even Ameson, to help me keep Glorfindel distracted from the fact that we were flying. Ameson was actually the most help, as his form of distraction was asking questions about Glorfindel's life, which Glorfindel then had to concentrate on to talk about. Ameson's questions were, of course, obvious digs for information, but since they worked so well at distracting Glorfindel, I decided not to stop him.

After we landed in Shanghai, however, I did take Ameson off to the side, along with Ecthelion and Elrohir, and had a very pointed conversation about what he 'should and should not' do with whatever information he gained while helping distract Glorfindel. Ameson readily agreed to all our 'suggestions'.

And, of course, it was in the Shanghai airport that I finally remembered my internal translator - and only after a small amount of confusion on my part, too! It started when Elrohir began looking lost. I naturally asked what he was looking for - our gate, as it happened - and he went to show me the symbols that would signify our gate, when I just looked around and went, "Isn't that it over there?" Elrohir gave me a weird look, but let it lie, and off we went. Then, of course, came the over-eager salesman, who had determined that I wanted to buy some nifty little gadget that had who-knows-what uses.

"Hey, bugger off already, will you? I'm not interested." I finally said in annoyance after the salesman had followed us - well, me, specifically - for about twenty feet. The salesman, ever smiling, made his apologies and left. I, of course, kept walking - until the mental feeling of distance between Glorfindel and I made me look behind me, and I found all my companions stopped in their tracks, back where I had told the salesman off. I stalked back.

"Hey, he had it coming, alright? No one has the right to be that pushy even if they only get paid in commission and have a wife and five kids." I stated, thinking they were surprised at me telling the salesman off.

"Oh, no one's disputing that." Elrohir said dryly. "It's just that none of us knew that you spoke Chinese."

"I don't." I replied, arching an eyebrow. "I speak exactly two languages - English and Kari's and my made up language. If you count Pig Latin, I speak three languages."

"Liar." Elladan accused. "You've spoken Common, Sindarin, and Quenya for millennia."

"And Dwarven." Gil-galad added, grimacing only slightly as he remembered the time I'd insulted one of his 'advisors' in Dwarven, only to discover that said advisor happened to know Dwarven. I frowned at the three of them - the twins and the High King - for several moments before memory of my internal translator finally came rushing back. And close on that memory's heels came the realization that Manga came from Japan and China primarily. I ignored the expectant people in front of me, awaiting an explanation, and began scanning for the nearest news stand. If I was in a position to read authentic, untranslated Manga, I wasn't going to pass it up.

Unfortunately, Glorfindel got wind of what I was doing - sometimes it's annoying, having your significant other able to read your thoughts - and before I got more than a few steps towards the nearest news stand, he darted forward and wrapped his arm around my waist, thereby restraining me without actually looking like he was restraining me. I, naturally, ruined the look by struggling against his grip.

:Authentic Manga! In it's original language: I whined mentally.

:You need to explain to everyone else about our internal translator.: Glorfindel said sternly, not even bothering to ask what I was on about now.

:That can wait! Manga: I insisted as Glorfindel, feeling his grip loosen, wrapped his other arm around my waist.

:No, it can't! Because if you disappear, they're going to want ME to explain: Glorfindel replied, a grimace coming across in his mental voice as I began prying at his fingers, trying to get them to let go.

:So? You're good at explaining tings! I'm good at finding and reading authentic Manga! So why not both of us do what we're good at: I asked, sounding as pitiful as I could, while giving Glorfindel my best puppy-dog eyes.

:Because it's YOUR gift, therefore YOU should explain it. Besides, I don't want to.: Glorfindel declared, not caving in the slightest at my look.

:But -:

:NO.: Glorfindel was firm this time, and I realized I wasn't going to move him - figuratively or literally. I sighed and stopped trying to get away. Glorfindel, sensing from my mind that this wasn't simply a trick to get him to loosen his grip so I could get away, relaxed his grip, and we turned back to the group with smiles on our faces. They were, naturally, giving us extremely freaked out looks - even Calenda and Gil-galad. Though Elrohir had a slightly suspicious tinge to his freaked out look - he probably had an idea what I had been trying to get to.

"You people are weird." Ameson murmured under his breath finally, breaking the silence. We all turned to look at him, and he looked back defiantly. "What? You are!"

"True enough." Calenda agreed after a moment more, and then all attention returned to me.

"So, Rachel, care to explain how you can speak six languages where you claim to only be able to speak two?" Elrohir asked, and I sighed.

"When Kari and I first got zapped back to Middle-Earth, we found that we could instantly understand and speak any language - save for Black Speech - even though we only ever spoke, heard, or saw our native language, English." I said. "We didn't notice at first, but I eventually discovered this 'internal translator', as well as how to turn it on or off. I haven't had need to pay attention to it for such a long time, however, that I just forgot about it - plus I didn't know it would do modern languages."

"So where did this 'internal translator' come from?" Elrohir asked curiously.

"Near as I can tell? It's a gift from the Valar, though I've never gotten around to asking them about it." I said with a shrug. There was a moment of silence from our little group.

"So you FORGOT about a gift from the Valar?" Ecthelion asked, arching an eyebrow.

"Hey, you know me." I said defensively. "And besides, I think it's meant to be forgotten about."

"Well, at least someone else will speak Tibetan." Elrohir said dryly after another short, silent moment.

"Indeed." I replied, then turned to Glorfindel. "Now can I go get Manga?" Glorfindel opened his mouth to reply, but at that moment, they called our flight. I looked westwards and said 'Why me?', and then Elrohir and I began hurrying everyone through the airport to our gate.

I couldn't tell whether or not Elrohir and Elladan 'soothed nerves' as we boarded the plane, and I decided not to ask as we got in the air again, heading for Beijing. From Beijing, we flew to Chengdu, and from Chengdu, finally, to Lhasa, Tibet. It was...odd to have spent all the travel time in planes and airports, and then suddenly step out into the middle of Tibet, which was very much different from the city we'd started in. Elrohir and I, being the only ones that spoke Tibetan, quickly agreed that, since Elrohir knew his way around, he could lead the group, while I'd stay with everyone else and translate - not to mention keep them out of trouble. At any rate, Elrohir managed to find accomodations for the night without much trouble, and then arranged for supplies for a hike to be delivered there the next morning. It would have been that day, but even us Elves were pretty much walking dead after our flights - Gil-galad actually had an arm around Ameson's shoulders, keeping the poor agent upright as he stumbled along with us.

Eventually, Elrohir led us into a hotel-type establishment, where we were led to our rooms, and all of us save Glorfindel promptly collapsed into the sleep of the dead. Glorfindel didn't crash because, on our last flight, the males had discussed and decided to keep a watch. I would have objected to their not including Calenda or I, who they knew could fight perfectly well, but I was dead tired, and they were willing, so I let it be. Calenda seemed to be of the same opinion.

I woke up close to fourteen hours later, before most everyone else, and promptly went and found food. Well, to be precise, I went and found Nam-kha, AKA, The Very Friendly Kitchen Man, and he, in turn, found me food. And spent most of my meal chuckling over how I shoveled it down. Not to mention the wise-cracks about how Tibet was supposed to be the starving third-world country, not America. Of course, once I was done breakfast, my mischievous streak decided to make an appearance, and I had Nam-kha fetch me the most fragrant piece of food the kitchen made. He was confused, but obliged me, and then - since I had been too hungry on my way down to the dining hall to pay attention to where I was going - he led me back up to our little party's rooms.

I'll give Glorfindel credit, he had excellent reflexes - Nam-kha jumped about a foot when Glorfindel suddenly went from sleep to fully awake and snatching for the food in my hands in one second flat. But Glorfindel and I haven't been able to surprise each other since about the fourth year after we were married. Distract? Yes. Surprise? No.

I dodged Glorfindel's snatch and dashed out of the room, Nam-kha - having caught on to the game - only inches behind me. Nam-kha shut the door behind him, but I knew that wouldn't stop Glorfindel for long, so with a quick wink for Ecthelion, who was standing guard and looking quite amused, I dashed into the next room, which happened to house Elladan and Elrohir. Nam-kha, this time, didn't follow, and the loud laughter coming from outside the room explained why.

At any rate, with Nam-kha laughing loud enough to wake the whole hotel, and the very delicious smelling food in my hands, it's no wonder that Elladan and Elrohir woke up. And, of course, I don't have the inside scoop on their brains, so they managed to surprise me, and snatched the food away. Let me tell you, there is nothing quite like darting into a room for safety, only to be pounced by two naked, identical male elves, who then snatch your food away and commence having an entirely ununderstandable conversation - or possibly argument - in what can only be termed TwinSpeak. I really don't know what else to call it...I don't recall ever hearing them do it before, but it was the oddest thing. They spoke in half sentences or broken sentences, leaving out words or phrases, sometimes replacing the words with gestures, most of the time not. It also consisted of significant looks - and ended in a brief arm wrestle, which Elrohir won. Then they finally settled down, Elladan munching happily on the biscuit-type food. How him losing had resulted in him getting the food, I don't know, and frankly, I was slightly too creeped out to ask.

"Sooo, you found a source of nourishment?" Elrohir asked cheerfully, turning to look at me. I stared at him for a moment.

"I think I'm going to take my chances out in the hall." I said, and then followed through on that plan, abruptly dashing back out into the hall. Glorfindel was, of course waiting for me, an evil gleam in his eyes - but it went away and was replaced by surprise when I dashed behind him and whimpered.

"Rachel?" he asked with confusion - and a little worry.

"Elladan and Elrohir are scary-evil-weird in the morning!" I whimpered. Silence, save for Nam-kha's now-quiet laughter, fell on the hallway for several seconds.

"Did she just admit that Elladan and Elrohir are too weird for her?" Ecthelion asked slowly from the end of the hallway, disbelief clear in his voice.

"I think she did." Glorfindel said, sounding shocked.

"Only on Tibetan mornings, though." I clarified from behind Glorfindel.

"It's still more than I ever thought I'd hear you admit." Ecthelion said dryly.

"Yes, well, shh!" I said. "Spaghetti." Glorfindel and Ecthelion just looked at me with these exasperated 'what now?' looks on their faces. I grinned, having regained my footing on the Plane of Weirdness. "So, who wants to wake up Gil-galad, Ameson, and Calenda?"

"No need." Ameson said grouchily from beside Ecthelion, and I noted with surprise that he was sitting huddled in the corner under a blanket.

"What're you doing out here?" I asked him curiously.

"Hmm...correct me if I'm wrong, but Calenda is your daughter, right?" Ameson asked, tilting his head to one side, and I nodded. "Then it's better you don't know." I frowned, then glanced at Glorfindel, wondering if he got what the Agent was getting at. Judging from his odd look, a cross between a smirk, annoyance, and nausea, he did - and just seeing the look on his face helped me figure it out. Of course, Glorfindel, having figured out just what his daughter was up to, immediately went and banged very LOUDLY on Calenda and Gil-galad's door.

"Fuck off!" came Gil-galad's voice, quite clearly, from the other side of the door. Glorfindel turned to me and arched an eyebrow.

"What!" I demanded. "I didn't teach him the word, I swear!"

"He is apparently very easily corrupted by the modern world, then." Glorfindel said dryly, and then banged again on Calenda and Gil-galad's door. Directly after his fourth bang, right when he was going to bang again, a very annoyed Calenda opened the door.

"What!" she demanded, very deliberately not hiding the fact that she was wearing nothing under her robe.

"Oh, nothing." Glorfindel said pleasantly, then turned around and walked back over to me. Calenda stared at him in shock.

"Gil-galad, my dad's been replaced by a Balrog. Come vanquish him?" she said finally, twisting around so she could speak back into her room. There was the sound of rustling behind Calenda, and then suddenly she stepped aside and shoved the door open. A throwing knife came whizzing by her and just missed Glorfindel before embedding itself in the wall. By the time all of us in the hall, having turned to look at the dagger, looked back at Calenda and Gil-galad's room, the door was closed again, and neither my daughter nor son-in-law were anywhere to be seen. Ecthelion, Glorfindel and I all looked at each other - and then burst out laughing, just as Elrohir and Elladan emerged from their room. Nam-kha, not understanding what was said, had been somewhat worried, especially when the knife came flying out of Calenda and Gil-galad's room, but soon came to laugh with us. Ameson just smirked drowsily in his corner, having had his, indirect, revenge. Elladan and Elrohir, of course, wanted to be let in on the joke, and by the time we'd recovered from our laughter and explained it to them, Calenda and Gil-galad emerged, looking thoroughly annoyed with the lot of us.

"Please tell me you have found food, thus excusing at least a small part of what you just did." Gil-galad growled as he and Calenda were confronted with five grinning Elves, a smirking FBI agent, and an uncertain, but still amused, Tibetan.

"Rachel has!" Elrohir supplied. "She woke Elladan and I up with it." Gil-galad looked at Elrohir in surprise, then his gaze slid over to Glorfindel, who was, noticeably, the only elf in the hall that wasn't fully dressed - he hadn't had time to do much more than pull on his pants before giving chase to me, after all. Glorfindel, of course, nodded in my direction as confirmation of the unspoken question. Gil-galad and Calenda glanced at each other, then back at me.

"You realize you're going to experience every unpleasant way there is to wake up over the next several weeks, don't you?" Calenda asked.

"Oh, probably." I said, waving my hand through the air. "But it was worth it. And why am I getting blamed for waking you two up, anyways? That was all Glorfindel."

"Well, we'd have to wake Glorfindel up to get to you, anyways." Gil-galad said with a shrug. Glorfindel sighed.

"The things I get dragged into." he said with mock despair, looking westward.

"Don't even TRY to pretend you didn't enjoy it." Ecthelion said dryly. "We know you too well." Glorfindel chuckled.

"Ah well. I'm going to go finish getting dressed, then perhaps we should all go downstairs for breakfast?" he suggested, and everyone quickly agreed. Of course, I decided that I could have a bit more fun, and tried to follow Glorfindel back into our room to, ahem, distract him and thus delay breakfast for the others after having woken them up so they could have it. Note the 'tried' part. Elrohir and Ecthelion grabbed my arms to keep me in the hall even as Glorfindel darted away, shutting the door very quickly, and sending me a mental 'STAY'. I sighed.

"It's horrible when everyone knows you too well." I said to Nam-kha in Tibetan, and he laughed. Elrohir, the only other to understand, chuckled as well, but declined to let the others in on the joke when they asked what was so amusing.

At any rate, Glorfindel emerged fairly quickly - he didn't even stop to braid his hair, so it was hanging loose - and we all tromped down to the dining room for breakfast. Of course, since I'd already eaten, Nam-kha didn't get a table setting for me, so I spent the entire meal annoying my fellow travelers - and snitching food off Glorfindel's plate. And Elrohir's. And Ecthelion's. And Calenda's. Elladan, Ameson, and Gil-galad I left alone, though - Ameson I didn't know well enough, Elladan could be very possessive about his food, and Gil-galad had brought more of his throwing knives with him and eyed me dangerously every time I got close to him.

Once we were finished eating, we thanked Nam-kha, and Elrohir headed out to find the supplies he'd arranged for our hike - which ended up taking him exactly as long as it took to open the hotel door and go three steps out, as everything was being delivered personally. Never mind that Elrohir hadn't asked for it to be delivered, nor told any of the merchants where we were staying (especially since he hadn't known at the time). Needless to say, Elrohir was quite surprised, especially when the merchants cheerfully helped split everything up into manageable bundles for each of us to carry - well, each of us but Ameson, who we weren't stupid enough to give his own pack of supplies. He may have gone along with us so far, but none of us forgot for more than a few moments that he was there as our prisoner. At any rate, I watched with amusement as Elrohir, in dazed surprise, directed the merchants as to where to go, and did his best to keep them from hauling our things down from our rooms and packing our backpacks for us. Then, spotting Nam-kha off to one side, watching with equal amusement, I sidled over to him.

"So, did you know about this?" I asked him conversationally, still watching the scene before me.

"Indeed. I told them where you and your friends were staying." Nam-kha replied equally conversationally.

"May I ask why?" I inquired.

"You may." Nam-kha replied with a hint of amusement in his voice. When he didn't say anything further, I rolled my eyes and chuckled.

"WHY did you tell them where we were staying?" I asked, turning to look at Nam-kha. He didn't reply for a moment, simply watching the others thoughtfully, and then slowly turned to face me.

"Because we could not let so many First Ones pass through our lands without giving them the proper honor." Nam-kha said carefully. "It would bring dishonor on us, and shame our families for generations." I couldn't help it, I gaped at Nam-kha for several moments. Then I grabbed his arm and hauled him off into a secluded corner.

"How do you know?" I demanded, my voice low, though not threatening.

"It was not I, but one of our monks." Nam-kha replied in a low voice. "Some of them have the gift of seeing the life force of those around them, human or animal, and one such saw Honoured...Elrohir?" Nam-kha paused with a glance in my direction, obviously asking if he'd gotten the name right, since Elrohir was currently using the name Harold (don't ask me why). I nodded in confirmation, and Nam-kha continued. "One of the monks with the Sight saw Honored Elrohir when he first came to our land many, many years ago. He saw how Honored Elrohir's life force was as old as the stones, and that it had no end, no matter how far forward he looked in it. The monk recorded what he saw, and ever since, monks with the Sight have watched new arrivals in our lands carefully, looking for the First One. None had ever dreamed to see seven First Ones at the same time, however. Truly, we had thought Honored Elrohir and his wife to be the last."

"They were." I said slowly, digesting what Nam-kha had said. "But others without your respect have captured...Elrohir's wife," I hesitated over what to call Kari before continuing, "And he called us back from the Undying Lands to help him save her." Nam-kha looked horrified that anyone would do such a thing.

"Truly, I cannot believe that any of my countrymen -" Nam-kha started, but I quickly cut him off.

"No no, it's no one from your country. Ameson, the mortal we travel with - it is his fellows who have done this." I explained. "We do not blame them, but in order to not warn them that we have discovered that they are responsible, we have to take Ameson somewhere secluded and safe. Honored Elrohir knows of a monestary where we hope to leave him."

"Oh." Nam-kha said, and the look he gave Ameson then was a strange mix of hostility, pity, and suspicion.

"Listen, Nam-kha - whatever you do, do not tell any of this to anyone else." I said sternly.

"I will tell no one." Nam-kha said solemnly.

"And if other travelers come looking for us, please, just stay out of their way." I said. "I don't know what lengths they'd go to to get the information out of you, and I'd rather not have you find out the hard way."

"I will guard your secret with my life." Nam-kha said, bowing his head slightly.

"No, not with your life." I said sternly. "There's no need for you to put your life on the line for us - just stay out of their way." Nam-kha just bowed again, and then slipped out of the corner. I called after him in the vague hope that he'd listen to me, but in the end, I knew he wouldn't. Sighing, I returned to the main group to find the others currently laughing and joking over Elrohir's continued fluster. Glorfindel, however, sensed the difference in my mood as soon as I stepped close, and he broke away from the conversation immediately, looking concerned as he put his arm around me and pulled me close.

:What is it, Rachel: he asked softly in my mind, and I replayed my conversation with Nam-kha to him.

:Should Ameson's friends come looking for him, Nam-kha's life will become very unpleasant.: I said with a sigh.

:Perhaps, but we do not know that this FBI will come looking for Ameson right away, and beyond that, it is Nam-kha's choice.: Glorfindel said soothingly. :Each of us choose our own paths, and Nam-kha has chosen to make his run parallel to ours for a time.:

:Doesn't mean I like it, though.: I grumped, and Glorfindel chuckled mentally.

:Only the insane, evil, or unfit like hearing that there are people willing to die for them.: Glorfindel said. :Turgon frequently snapped at the Chiefs of the Houses of Gondolin when they would make plans to have their best men - or they themselves - near him when battle was expected. We didn't even dare suggest it to Gil-galad...and, well, we all know how that turned out. So we tried it again with Estel, but he became downright unruly when we would try to protect him.: A touch of amusement followed that last thought, along with the brief image of a young Aragorn shouldering his way in-between two Elves to make the killing blow on an orc the Elves had obviously been protecting him from. I couldn't help but chuckle slightly at that.

:Then I'm in good company, I suppose.: I said, then with a mental caress and kiss, returned my attention to the others as the merchants finished getting everything ready for us. I made sure to thank each and every one of the merchants personally, and Elrohir, confused, did the same at my prompting. The others made similar motions of thanks, though their thank-yous were more general, as they didn't know the language. Then, finally, we settled our packs on our shoulders and set out. The merchants, supposedly just going along with us to their shops, escorted us to the edge of the city, never mind that we went in the opposite direction from the hotel as the airport, and all their shops were between the hotel and airport.

This, of course, caused much comment among everyone else, and once we were out of the city, I felt obliged to explain to them all what I'd learned from Nam-kha. Elrohir was, naturally, quite stunned, and yet at the same time, admitted that he'd known on some level that they knew about him and Kari - he'd always felt more at ease in Tibet than anywhere else, acting more like himself than he did anywhere else. And so began our first full day in Tibet.

----To Be Continued...with the end of 'Lord of the Rings' that you never heard from Tolkien!----

-Authors Note:-

Ehm, sorry for the loooooong time between updates. There are many reasons for this. The first week after my last update, I hadn't written the chapter. The second week, I was thoroughly and unashamedly distracted by the wonderful guy known to you all as Duke Storm, who came up for a visit. The third week, there was an...interesting trend at work, with people not knowing when they were supposed to be there - half the people didn't show up when they were supposed to, or showed up when they weren't supposed to. The fourth week, in protest against the stupidity of the staff running it, everything in the store decided to break down at once - including the till - while what seemed like half the city decided they wanted to buy from us.

The fifth week after my last update - also known as two weeks ago - I finally managed to finish writing the chapter...only to realize that I forgot something, and that I didn't really need the guide I originally saddled our friends with. So I re-wrote the chapter. Then, while switching files from my old shared computers to my new, personnal computer that I don't have to share with anyone, I accidentally over-wrote the re-write of the chapter. I sulked for a few days about doing this, and then I finally re-rewrote the chapter. Only to discover that my new computer didn't have a word processing program on it besides notepad and wordpad - which, while nice, don't have a spellchecker to catch my stupid typos. So I spent a few days finding one of those, and finally, today, finished the chapter.

So that's the story of my last month and a half. We won't even mention the fact that, as of last Friday, four of the seven staff at our store went on vacation, leaving just three of us to run the store, sometimes for a twelve-hour long day. Whee? Yeah.

Anyways. Sorry for not replying to any reviews for the last chapter - I assure you, each and every one is appreciated. I may go through and reply to some of the ones with specific questions in them over the next few days, but I won't be responding to all of them. Likewise, I don't think I'll be able to respond to every review from now on, due to time constraints. It took me close to, if not more than, an hour to post a chapter before, since I was replying to all the reviews for the previous chapter before I did so, and I just don't have the time for that anymore, sadly. As I'm writing this, in fact, I have a little over an hour before I have to go to work, and I have about six different things I need to do between now and then. (including eat)

Yeah. That's the story of my busy life. On the amusing side, while I was transferring things between computers, I found two random, half-finished FanFictions from different fandoms that I'd completely forgotten about...I mean, literally forgot about. I can't even remember the plot I planned for them, and spent half an hour trying to figure out if they were actually mine or something somebody else wrote, until I recognized something that was unmistakably my sense of humour. Heh.

Now, I'm going to end this stupidly long Author's Note. I hope you all enjoyed the chapter - and please, review! All reviews are appreciated, and I'll be thinking up something to do as thanks instead of replying to each and every review.

Namarie,

-Crimson Starlight

-Authors Note the Second:-

Sorry for no new chapter, but I don't actually have another chapter, and since doesn't allow author's-note-only chapters anymore...well, you get the idea. Anyways. Any of you who have access to my LiveJournal will already know what I'm about to say, so, for your entertainment, random 'Glorfindel slogans' produced by The Advertising Slogan Generator (www . thesurrealist . co . uk / slogan . cgi):

"It's a Beautiful Glorfindel." "No-One Does Chicken Like Glorfindel." "Go On, Get Your Glorfindel Out." "Stimulation for Body and Glorfindel." "Just One Glorfindel - Give It To Me!" "Make Room for the Glorfindel." "The Glorfindel Effect." "I Wish They All Could Be Glorfindel Girls." "Think Once, Think Twice, Think Glorfindel." "Easy, Breezy, Beautiful Glorfindel."

And now tht that's done, on to what I have to say.

Two weeks ago, I woke up to prepare the next chapter of this story for upload...only to find my computer making clunking noises at me and demanding a boot disk to start up. Further investigation revealed that my computer had suffered a catastrophic physical hard drive failure (not my words for it, but apt, nonetheless). Now, due to the fact that I got a second hard drive recently, I DO have my computer working again, but the hard drive with ALL my data on it is currently sitting in my closet. (We won't even mention what happened to my back-ups)

The ONLY way I can get the data off that hard drive is to pay $1000+ (Canadian) to have it shipped to someplace in Ontario, where some highly trained people are going to take it into an ultra-clean room, take it apart, pull the data discs out, and put them in a different hard drive, one specially made to handle random hard drive data discs being dumped into it. And even then, there's no garauntee, though the guys at the computer store say there's a good chance that the data can be retrieved.

Now, I don't have the thousand dollars right now, but I'm working on it. Still, it's going to be several months at the least before I even send the thing away. And since the cost increases the quicker you want it done, it will probably be another little while - perhaps a few months, perhaps less, I haven't asked about times yet - before I get the data BACK, assuming they can retrieve it. As soon as I get the data back, however, you will get your update. Or, if I get fed up, I may rewrite the chapter for you. Big if there, though - I've already re-written this particular chapter three times, and it's becoming a matter of principle to get it back and post it.

So, essentially, what I'm saying is this: Don't expect an update before the end of the year.

It's sad, it's depressing, but there it is. Maybe I'll be able to post as a Christmas/Yule/whatever present for everyone. We'll see.

Until then, remember to back up your stuff!

-CS


	10. Chapter 9: Tibet

-The Games of the Gods, Book Two: Playing the Game-

-Disclaimer-  
Nothing belongs to me besides the characters of Rachel and Kari, and sometimes I wonder about them. The rest belongs to the brilliant genius that was JRR Tolkien...or reality.

-9: Tibet-

We spent most of our first day of travel in silence, talking only occasionally as we walked along. Ameson was, at all times while we walked, sandwiched between any two random male members of the party - guarded, as it was. He seemed to find this infinitely amusing, and spent most of the day grinning or snickering to himself. He reminded me of Captain Sheridan from the beginning of a Babylon 5 episode I'd seen once, to be honest. And it was just as weird in person as it had been on the show.

The rest of us, I think, were just getting used to being out in the wilderness again. Oh sure, we were on a rough road for most of the day, and there were signs of habitation around most of the time - though they dwindled as the day went on - but Tibet had a natural feel that had long since disapeared from all but the most remote spots of North America. And as Elves, we revelled in that feeling. It was...odd for me, since the only places I'd ever been since becoming an Elf had had that respect for nature. Even Bree. Calenda found it odd, as well. Neither of us had really noticed the lack of nature or wilderness until we found ourselves back in it.

When the sun began to set, Elrohir started looking around for a place to camp. We, of course, asked him why he wasn't looking for a farm house to stay at, and he gave us some odd explanation that, I think, consisted of Ameson trying to escape and wanting to sleep under the stars again. At any rate, we ended up camping outside that night. Most of us crashed right away, not even caring that the ground was rocky, but Glorfindel, Ecthelion, and, surprisingly, Ameson, claimed they weren't tired and stayed up, talking softly, while the rest of us slipped into Elvish sleep. I have no idea how late they stayed up, only that they were the ones to wake everyone the next morning, seeming as energetic as the rest of us.

The next day was much the same as the first, only with more talking. We'd gotten used to being back in a natural land once again, and now were beginning to talk bout it, and other lands of the past, as we walked. This, of course, naturally brought us to wondering what had happened to the other races of Middle-Earth, Hobbits in particular.

"You don't want to know." Elrohir said gruffly when we asked him. There was a moment of silence as we all looked at him, and he sighed. "OK, maybe you do." he grumbled. "There was an earthquake. The Shire fell into the ocean, along with the Grey Havens."

"Oh, how cheerful." I said with a grimace.

"I told you you didn't want to kow." Elrohir said defensively. "Just be glad I didn't tell you what happened to the Dwarves." We walked in silence for a few more minutes, and then Elrohir sighed and looked back at all our expectant faces. "Fine, I'll tell you."

"Excellent." I said.

"As depressing as it likely is, it would be nice to know." Glorfindel said with a sad smile.

"The Lonely Mountain turned out to be a dormant volcano, which erupted due to the same earthquake in which the Shire and Grey Havens were lost. Moria was over-run with orcs again before the Dwarves there used some of Saruman's explosive powder to collapse the mines rather than let the orcs take over again. Happened to end the orcs along with the Dwarves, so I suppose some good came of it." Elrohir stated flatly. "The Hobbits and Dwarves that weren't in their homelands when they were destroyed eventually either died out or married taller people, so that their bloodlines died out. The monstrous races like trolls and orcs just sort of disapeared over the years. I think without a master mind like Sauron, Morgoth, or Saruman to watch over them, they fought themselves into extinction." There was a moment of silence.

"Well, so much for a happy ending." I said with a sigh.

"I just wish I could've seen them." Calenda said with a shrug. "The tales you all tell about the Hobbits and Dwarves make them seem very fun and interesting."

"I second the wishing I could've seen them." Ecthelion said.

"I thought you were one of the older ones?" Ameson asked in confusion.

"I am, but I died before the Hobbits and Dwarves were really discovered." Ecthelion said with a shrug, and then shot a glare at Glorfindel. "And unlike SOME people, I wasn't picked by the Valar to return to life, and Arda, early."

"Not my fault. Totally NOT my fault." Glorfindel insisted.

"Oh, so you didn't bother Mandos repeatedly with questions about being dead until He got tired of you and practically forced Manwe to let Him send you back?" Gil-galad asked.

"No, of course not." Glorfindel replied with a sniff of indignation.

"That's not what Mandos said." Gil-galad said, arching an eyebrow, and Glorfindel gave him a startled look.

"When did He say that?" Glorfindel asked.

"When I was dead and asked Him why He hadn't gotten sick of me annoying Him yet." Gil-galad stated. "Which was sometime after my twelfth escape attempt."

"You tried to...escape...from the Halls of Mandos?" Elladan asked, arching an eyebrow.

"It was something to do." Gil-galad said with a shrug and a grin. "Anyways. Mandos told me that He had been annoyed by the master and was now immune to all forms of annoyance by anyone else."

"Aha, so He never actually said my name!" Glorfindel said.

"Well, then I asked Him who this 'master' was, and He gave me your name." Gil-galad continued. "Then He shoved me into some type of cosmic hole and let me spend the next little while climbing out..." Gil-galad, for some reason, smiled fondly at the thought.

"He lied." Glorfindel said after a pause. All the Elves looked at him.

"You realize what you just said, right?" Ecthelion asked dryly. Glorfindel frowned.

"Ok, He didn't lie." Glorfindel said, then eyed Gil-galad. "Which leaves only one other option. Gil-galad is lying." Thus commenced a brief skirmish in which Gil-galad and Glorfindel ended up pulling their swords out and having a little duel as we went down the path. The rest of us ignored them, except for Calenda and I, who were doing our best not to giggle. I failed spectacularly when Glorfindel lifted some 'Princess Bride' and 'Zorro' lines from my head and started saying them outloud. They made absolutely no sense in this situation, of course, but that just made them funnier, especially once Gil-galad started replying with old, First Age battle cries. We eventually had to stop and let Gil-galad and Glorfindel finish their strange little duel as Elrohir joined me in collapsing onto the ground with laughter. It was the 'My name is Inigo Montoya. You killed my father. Prepare to die!' line from Glorfindel, done in the proper accent, that did it.

The duel, of course, ended in a draw, as Glorfindel and Gil-galad both managed to slip past each others defences at the same time to put their swords at each others throats. They both looked surprised for a moment, and then grinned.

"You win!" Gil-galad conceeded.

"No, you win." Glorfindel contradicted.

"I said it first - you win!" Gil-galad insisted.

"You're a High King - YOU win!" Glorfindel countered.

"And I'm you're son-in-law - you win!" Gil-galad said, then paused and mused out loud, "That still sounds wierd."

"You have no idea." Glorfindel replied. "You win."

"No, you win." Gil-galad insisted. He and Glorfindel locked gazes then and had a short staring contest. It ended with both of them blinking at the same time. Gil-galad frowned, and Glorfindel arched an eyebrow.

"We win." they said in unison, then sheathed their swords and turned back to the rest of the group.

"OK, I knew Gil-galad was weird from Father's stories, and I knew Glorfindel had to be somewhat weird to put up with you, Rachel, but that has to be the only time I've ever seen them both truly ACTING weird." Elrohir said, turning to me. "And I have to say, it's disturbing."

"So are you and Elladan in the morning." I replied dryly. "Now, shall we move on?" And so we did. The rest of the day continued in a similar light-hearted vein, though I doubt any of us, especially Ameson, forgot why we were there and what we were doing. But we chose to ignore it that day, and so, on the surface, it seemed as though we were just a group of friends travelling through rough wilderness.

In the evening, Elrohir found us another outside camping spot - outside this time because the closest house was another hours walk away, and the sun had already set. We made a quick little camp, then ate supper and settled down. Ameson went to sleep almost immediately, but us Elves stayed up talking for awhile longer. Elrohir's tale of the end of the Hobbits and Dwarves have brought up old memories, and we all spent several hours reminicing. Eventually, we all got depressed enough that we decided it would be best for us to go to sleep, before one of us Faded. That brought a sour laugh from most of the group before we turned in, Elladan staying up on watch.

The next morning, we were much more somber as we set out. Well, everybody else was. My somberness lastness just long enouh for the sun to come out and shine down on us, lighting up the day, making birds sing and little animals scurry around. In other words, everybody else resisted the cheeriness of the day, while I could not. Neither could Ameson, apparently, though he hadn't really been somber to begin with, and was slightly confused as to why we all were, having missed our conversation the night before. At any rate, since he was the only other cheerful person in the group, I decided to go over and talk to him.

"Hi." I said cheerfully as I walked up beside him.

"Hello." Ameson replied, smiling slightly. Then he glanced at everyone else, leaned towards me, and asked in a stage whisper, "Whose dog died?" I chuckled.

"No one's. We were just playing 'Do you remember...?' last night, and it's got everyone depressed." I replied.

"Everyone except you." Ameson pointed out.

"Yes, well, I am unable to resist the cheeriness of the day." I said with a shrug. "Plus, I thoroughly enjoyed Middle-Earth while I lived there, knowing that one day, it would fade away."

::Liar. You didn't know it would fade away until Elladan brought that message from Kari!:: Glorfindel accused in my head, a hint of amusement and teasing in his mental voice.

::Not true! I knew it would fade away somehow, become something different than what it was. I just didn't know it was going to become the world I came from.:: I replied.

::Right.:: Glorfindel said, sounding only half convinced. His mental voice held more amusement and teasing now, as he could feel the truth behind my words. In response, I dashed over to him and pinched his butt - causing him to yelp - before returning to Ameson.

"What was that about?" Ameson asked, puzzled.

"He was being annoying." I replied sagely.

"How? He was just walking along!" Ameson protested.

"Well, Elven couples who are especially close can develop a sort of telepathy between themselves." I replied, honestly rather surprised that we hadn't mentioned this to Ameson before. "It's how Elrohir knew who had Kari - before he left for Valinor, she woke up once long enough to give him a mental message."

"Oooh." Ameson said, a variety of emotions crossing his face at this news. "So can he hear anything from her now?"

"No, and I try constantly to get through to her." came Elrohir's voice from ahead. Ameson jumped.

"Right, Elven hearing." he muttered, then frowned thoughtfully, looking slightly disturbed, as well, as he looked around at the landscape.

Of course, then I realized that I'd successfully depressed the only other cheerful person in the group, which was not what I intended. So I wracked my brains trying to think of a way to lighten the mood. The only thing I came up with was a question that was dying to be asked, anyways, so even though it wasn't necisarily cheerful, I figured I'd ask it anyways while I tried to think of something more cheerful.

"So, when ARE you going to try and escape?" I asked. Ameson looked over at me, startled, and I gave him an innocent look. I could almost SEE everone else's ears pricking up, waiting for Ameson's answer.

"Oh, I wasn't thinking of it at all, actually." Ameson replied finally, smiling slightly. I gave him a 'how stupid do you think I am?' look. "No, I'm serious." he insisted. "After all, it's not very smart to pull an escape attempt unless you know you can succeed, and if you know you can succeed, you aren't TRYING to escape, you ARE escaping. So either I never see an opening, and don't bother escaping, or I find a way to escape, and you never see me again. Either way, I am not TRYING to escape at all." I blinked at Ameson, and then giggled. Within moments, my giggle had turned into full-fledged laughter that eventually required me to sit down.

"No offence, Elrohir, but I think I like the FBI." I declared once I had finished laughing. Everyone was now, of course, looking at me as I sat on the ground, but I didn't much care. The absurdity of the situation - where I was, what I was doing, and with whom I was doing it - had momentarily become too much to hold in.

"As far as I'm concerned, you can like them all you want, just so long as you help me get Kari back." Elrohir said dryly, then grinned evilly. "Then SHE can tear strips out of you for liking the FBI." I snickered.

"Too true." I said as I stood and we started walking again. "Which means my apologies Ameson, but your organization shall remain on my hit list until further notice."

"No need to apologize." Ameson replied. "I understand perfectly." I giggled again, then, seeing the mischievious twinkle in Ameson's eyes, I decided to go walk by Glorfindel before I ended up laughing so hard I needed to sit down again. I had apparently successfully cheered Ameson up. Which was just as well, as halfway through the afternoon that day, it started to drizzle.

By evening, we were all soaking wet, and Elrohir had to find us an unoccupied cave to sleep in for the night. Unfortunately, we woke early the next morning to discover just WHY the cave was uninhabited - it flooded in rainstorms. And rainstorm is what the drizzle had become. Elrohir made a displeased noise when he saw that.

"I hate walking in the rain." he said.

"Well, shouldn't we just find another cave to hole up in until it stops, anyways?" I asked curiously.

"No, knowing Tibet, the storm could last for several days, and I don't want to waste the time. Besides, we're only a day or two from the monestary." Elrohir said, then turned to Ameson. "And we have a soaking wet mortal who's likely to catch a cold no matter what, but more likely to catch pnuemonia if we wait for the storm to end without drying him off."

"So nice to know you're thinking of me." Ameson mumbled, currently huddling in Ecthelion's sleeping bag, which was the driest of the lot. Even then, it was still damp, and the end was just plain soaking wet, having fallen in a puddle overnight.

"Well, let's get going then, shall we?" Elrohir said, starting to pack up all our wet belongings. "The sooner we get going, the sooner we can get to the monestary and get warm and dry." That made us all speed up our packing, especially Ameson.

The pace we set for walking that day, along with the rain and eentual thunder and lightning, made it impossible to talk much, except for between Glorfindel and I, or Calenda and Gil-galad. So I spent the day paying only partial attention to the world around me, most of my conciousness turned inwards, where in our minds, Glorfindel and I were walking along the beaches of Dol Amroth, talking about anything and everything, especially the events of recent days.

::You know, sometimes I never quite understood where you were coming from, Rachel, even when I could look into your mind.:: Glorfindel commented at one point. ::But seeing your world - I have begun to understand.::

::We are all the product of where we grew up, I suppose.:: I said with a shrug.

::And where you grew up is so much more complex than where I did, that it makes you more difficult to understand.:: Glorfindel replied.

::I suppose, but sometimes you can be just as difficult to understand.:: I said. ::I was only able to adapt so well to your way of thinking because I know the world you come from, I know the tales, and I've met the people. Someone from my world who hadn't would find it as difficult figuring out where you were coming from as...well, as any of the hobbits would find my world.:: In our minds, San Fransisco flickered into view around us, with the four hobbits from the Fellowship standing on a street corner, looking around themselves in utter confusion. We chuckled as our mental landscape flickered back to Dol Amroth. We moved on to other topics, then, only pulling our attention back to the rainy landscape around us when Elrohir suddenly darted into a nearby hole of blackness, stating that we were stopping for the night.

Following Elrohir, the rest of us discovered that the hole of blackness was, in fact, a cave, as unihabited as the last one, though much much drier. Ameson, upon entering the cave, found a boulder to curl up against and just sat there, shivering, until Elrohir and Elladan started a fire. Then the bedraggled agent moved next to the fire and started muttering under his breath. We all chose to ignore the fact that we could hear each and every insult he hurled at us under his breath. Elladan, in fact, pulled out a welcome surprise. None of us even really noticed what he was doing until the wholesome scent of athelas filled the cave, and then we all whirled with exclamations of surprise to see him giving Ameson a tea of some sort, the steaming bowl with athelas leaves floating in it sitting by the fire. Only once he was sure Ameson whad the tea did Elladan turn to us.

"Father took a plant of it with him when he left for Valinor. He gave me a few leaves before we left." Elladan stated. "I figured now was as good a time as any to use some of them."

"Certainly cheers things up. But I thought athelas only healed in the hands of a true Numenorian king?" Calenda asked curiously, glancing at the cup Ameson was holding.

"It does. That's just cammomile tea." Elladan replied with a grin, and Calenda chuckled.

"Silly me, of course it is." she said, and then most of us set about spreading our wet sleeping bags out in the hopes they'd dry before we had to crawl into them - Ameson and Elladan were the only ones who didn't help in the endeavour, and that was because Ameson was, well, still recovering, and Elladan was cooking supper. Supper, some sort of stew, was ready surprisingly quickly, and we all ate ravenously. Once we were done, even us Elves were ready for a good night's sleep, but our sleeping bags were still unpleasantly damp, so we stayed up for awhile longer. Ameson, of course, passed out in Ecthelion's sleeping bag - which was still the driest, apparently Ecthelion had a hidden talent for keeping camping gear dry - immediately after finishing eating. Once he was good and thoroughly out, Elladan carefully went and checked the man's temperature.

"He hasn't caught anything yet, but another day and night like this and he will." Elladan declared with certainty as he returned to the fire.

"We'll reach the monestary early tomorrow." Elrohir assured his brother. Then talk turned to other things, and eventually, all of us but Gil-galad - who was on watch - crawled into our still-damp sleeping bags and slept until morning. Ameson was the first one up the next morning, after Glorfindel, who took over from Gil-galad half-way through the night, and to my surprise, the agent managed to cook us a fairly decent breakfast.

"You can cook...decently!" I said, not bothering to hide my surprise as I took a bite of the food on the plate Ameson had handed me when I'd dragged myself over to the fire. I was the second - technically third - one up that morning.

"Well I DO have my own house, with no other roommates." Ameson said dryly. "Learning to cook is kind of a requirement in that situation."

"Not really." I said dryly, and Ameson blinked, then chuckled.

"No, I suppose you're right, it's not." he said. "Regardless, I wanted to be a chef when I was younger, and took the appropriate courses and had the appropriate jobs right up until my third year of university."

"And what happened in your third year of university?" I asked curiously.

"Due entirely to my drunken, partying roommate, I missed the deadline for getting into most of my classes, and had to take whatever I could get, which happened to be a lot of logic and science courses. Also, my friend talked me into taking a martial arts course, and I managed to - entirely accidentally - lay out the black belt teaching the course on my second day. And when I say 'lay out', I mean unconcious with a broken nose and no clue on either side as to why he didn't see my punch coming." Ameson said with a chuckle. I joined him in laughter before turning my attention to the meal.

It really was very good, a fact which I shared with Calenda and Elladan the moment their eyes focused and it was clear they were awake and getting up. I actually tried to get seconds, but Ameson beat me off with a spoon, saying I could have seconds once everyone else had had firsts. And when I say 'beat me off with a spoon', I mean literally. Heaven knows why, but Elrohir had packed a long-handled wooden spoon, and when I tried to get seconds, Ameson rapped me across the knuckles with it. Of course, that isn't exactly sufficient to discourage me, so I went for it again, and recieved another rap before he whacked me on the butt as well.

"Glorfindel!" I whined at that point. "Our prisoner is beating up on me!" I turned to the elf that I sometimes called my husband, only to find him shaking with silent laughter. "Traitor!" I declared after gaping at him for a moment, then tried once more to get seconds. This time, when Ameson started whacking me with the spoon, I tried to get Calenda and Elladan to help, but they both declared that they were too busy eating this WONDERFUL food to help me. Even without looked at them, I could see their amused smirks. They actually started sniggering by the time Ameson stopped whacking me with the spoon, which wasn't until I was cowering in fear on the other side of the cave, huddled against the same boulder Ameson had been when we first entered the cave the night before. The fearful look on my face turned out to be too much for Glorfindel, as his silent laughter turned explosively unsilent shortly after that, and that resulted in everyone else waking up with a start. Of course, they all stared, disconcerted, at the situation presented to them - me cowering against a boulder, Ameson standing threateningly over me, brandishing a spoon, while Glorfindel laughed hysterically.

"It's too early in the morning to even try." Ecthelion declared, turning away from the scene, then hauled himself out of his sleeping bag and went over to the fire to help himself to breakfast. With a last, warning look, Ameson went and joined him. I tentatively followed as Elrohir and Gil-galad followed Ecthelion to the fire.

"This is good." Ecthelion said in surprise as he had his first bite.

"Yes, it is. And you will never guess who made it." Calenda said with a smile.

"Who?" Ecthelion asked with a frown.

"Ameson." I said with a smirk as I returned to my seat by the fire, though I was watching Glorfindel somewhat worriedly - he was still in silent convulsions of laughter, both physically and mentally. I couldn't get ANYTHING coherent from him. So at first I missed Elrohir freezing, fork full of food halfway to his mouth.

"Ameson cooked this?" Elrohir asked with a frown, and I nodded as I looked at him curiously. "You...let our prisoner cook breakfast? Tell me you at least watched him?" I blinked.

"I was asleep." I said, somewhat confused.

"So you have no idea what he might of put in it?" Elrohir pressed, and I blinked again, then realization lit my face as I finally realized what Elrohir was getting at - he was afraid Ameson had poisoned the food. I frowned and looked at Ameson, only to see him chowing down on his own platefull of food, seemingly not paying attention to the conversation. The way he was very obviously chewing and eating his food, however, showed that he was, in fact, listening, and proving Elrohir's suppositions wrong in his own way.

"Well, he's eating it too, so he can't have put anything bad in it." I pointed out. "I'm not dead yet, anyways. Though Glory might be if he doesn't stop laughing soon. It wasn't THAT funny." I glared at Glorfindel, who was now just snickering quietly as he sat on his rock. At my pointed comment and look, Glorfindel looked up at the rest of the group, and after lifting the topic of conversation from my obliging mind, he decided to step in on behalf of Ameson.

"I watched him the whole time he made it. He didn't put anything but food in it." Glorfindel stated.

"Yes, well, if he hid a talent for cooking, how do we know he isn't also hiding a talent for sleight of hand?" Elrohir inquired suspiciously. Ameson snorted.

"Trust me, sleight of hand, I'm no good at. The FBI won't let me do undercover work because I suck so badly at it. The last time I tried, some seven year old kid, who wasn't even in on the test, spotted me." the agent said dryly.

"So you say." Elrohir said with a frown.

"Sheesh, Elrohir, nothing bad has happened so far. And do you really think Ameson is going to poison us when we have limited food and there's a rainstorm going on out there that only you seem to know your way through to the nearest shelter?" I asked, also frowning now. Elrohir muttered discontentedly, but eventually agreed that it made no sense for Ameson to poison us right then and there. Then, he rounded on Glorfindel.

"And why exactly were you watching Ameson cook instead of standing watch? Not that you ever STAND watch - you're always sitting." Elrohir said.

"I was watching our prisoner closely. And why stand when you don't need to?" Glorfindel asked, smiling innocently. "All that gets you is sore feet, something that you get enough of on any trip requiring a watch."

"Here here!" Gil-galad and Ecthelion piped up, then returned to eating.

"Didn't you once tell us that a warrior must be alert and ready for action at all times, and that they could not be that while sitting?" Elladan put in at that point, frowning slightly.

"Young, inexperienced warriors cannot be alert and ready for action at all time while sitting." Glorfindel clarified. "Warriors like me, however, can."

"So what, once you gain a fifth digit in your age, you're suddenly allowed to sit on watch?" Elrohir asked with a frown.

"No, brother, once you gain a fifth digit, you're not just allowed to sit down, you HAVE to sit down, since you're so old and feeble." Elladan corrected with a smirk. Glorfindel, Gil-galad, and Ecthelion exchanged glances.

"You two hold, I'll get the spoon." Glorfindel stated, and suddenly Gil-galad and Ecthelion were diving for Elladan and Elrohir, while Glorfindel fetched the spoon from Ameson. He then had to wait while Gil-galad and Ecthelion subdued Elladan and Elrohir before he whacked both of the twins - hard - on their backsides with the spoon, at which point they were let go. Glorfindel pondered the spoon for a moment.

"I suddenly see the appeal of Boromir's shield, Rachel." he said, flashing a grin in my direction.

"FINALLY! It only took...what? Several THOUSAND years?" I muttered, and Glorfindel chuckled. The rest of breakfast continued in the same sort of mood, all of us steadfastly ignoring the pouring rain outside, and the fact that we'd have to go out in it very soon. We actually lingered in the cave much longer than we should've, but since Elrohir assured us that the monestary wasn't all that far away, we didn't feel much of a rush. Ameson, especially, seemed to appreciate the extra time spent in the cave.

But eventually, Elladan put the last log of firewood we had on the fire, and we realized we needed to pack up and go. So we did, setting out into the rain with no few grumbles from everyone involved. Elladan and Ecthelion kept close to Ameson as we went, all too aware that even for us Elves, visibility in the rainstorm was horrible, making it a perfect time for Ameson to escape. Ameson hardly seemed up to escaping, however, huddled in his coat, trying to make himself as small as possible while he walked as fast as he could go.

The rest of us were similarily miserable - there wasn't much talk even between Glorfindel ad I, and I suspect Gil-galad and Calenda didn't talk much, either. Therefore, we were all happy when Elrohir suddenly made an abrupt turn, and thick wooden doors loomed up out of the rain, a large, monestary-like building behind them. Elrohir had to bang on the door heavily for several minutes before someone finally opened it, and then the monk that did so only opened it a crack at first, until he saw Elrohir's face. Then the door opened all the way, and we were hustled inside while the monk called for his fellows to get warm baths and food prepared for us. Even as the monk was shutting the door behind us, several more important-looking - or at least more enlightened-looking - monks showed up to greet Elrohir. I noticed the eyes of one of the monks near the back widened perceptibly as he took in the group, and I knew that he had the Sight Nam-kha had spoken about.

I didn't pay much attention as Elrohir exchanged pleasantries with the monk that seemed to be in charge, only caring once we were shown to a large dining hall, given seats near a large fireplace, and given large platters of warm food to eat. We all dug in and ate heartily, even Ameson, who had started to sniffle. We finished our meal before the monks could finish heating enough water for warm baths for us, so we sat and talked instead. Elrohir revealed that we'd stayed a little longer in the cave than we'd thought this morning, and it was actually evening now. None of us really cared, and so he turned his attention to Ameson for a moment.

"So I guess you shan't be escaping after all." Elrohir said.

"Apparently." Ameson muttered, then let out an explosive sneeze. There was a sprinkling of laughter, and then we let the poor agent be, until the monks came and told us our baths were ready. Then Calenda and I took charge of Ameson, who seemed to be worsening, and got him to his bath. A few quick words from me explained the situation to the monks, and they soon brought all sorts of things to help someone who was sick. Within an hour, we had Ameson tucked into a nice warm bed, out cold due to a natural cold-curing and sedative herb mixture the monks had turned up. Only then did Calenda and I go have our own baths, and finally crawl into bed with our husbands. For being a monestary, the monks were surprisingly accomidating towards two married couples.

----To Be Continued...with the man wanted for crimes in almost every country of the world!----

-Authors Note-  
BLAAAAARG. After many, many troubles involving not only my computer, but work, as well, I'm back - for one chapter. The next chapter for this story is NOT finished, and is currently not being written on, either. This is partially due to NaNoWriMo, but mostly due to lack of interest. Methos, Jack O'Neill, and John Sheppard keep kidnapping me and putting evil crossover plots in my head. And we won't even mention the various characters from Harry Potter that occasionally try to drag me down into THAT FanFicdom...

Anyways. The point is, I have no idea when the next update will be. I'll try and make it sooner rather than later, but until further notice, this story is, sadly, on hiatus.

-Crimson Starlight, off to find a well-shield bunker to hide in... 


End file.
